re: Forbes: ‘Rise Of Skywalker’ Is The Worst ‘Star Wars’ Movie Ever

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Talks about the multiple reviewers all saying the same thing - basically "if you hated The Last Jedi, you'll like Fall of Skywalker" or "this movie sucks because it undoes all of Rian's fine work."

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I think they are trying to use reverse psychology to sell tickets to this dumpster fire of a movie.

It’s also weird that this many reviewers miss the biggest complaint about TLJ. That Rian Johnson shite all over the Luke Skywalker character. That problem can’t really be fixed at this point.

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They got a bunch of shills to say the same thing, that the new one sucks - because it sticks it to Big Bad Rian Johnson.

So you're supposed to react like that.

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So you think Disney paid them to give bad reviews?

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Somebody get this guy an account and get him in here!

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Displaced Buckeye, or whatever his name is, is chubbing up over this.

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two extraneous new characters seemingly meant to “no homo” Finn and Poe

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...in a galaxy far, far away, they've figured out how to correct that birth defect before the child is born.

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The way you really know is that they all claim that ROS is fan service, but I know of ZERO fans who wanted to see Palpatine again.

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With Rian killing Snoke, JJ probably didn’t have many other options than Palpatine.

I don’t really blame JJ for this movie, but he probably never should have accepted the job. There was absolutely no way anyone could make a coherent ending after what Rian did. Based on how Hollywood operates, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is a career killer for JJ if it doesn’t meet Disney’s revenue expectations.

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JJ will be fine. He'll go back to making his Cloverfield or Super 8 type movies. He's still a big director and will have plenty of opportunities moving forward after Star Wars.

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He signed a huge deal with Warner. He's got his pick of franchises to play with there.

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JJ was lazy and didnt want to put any effort into making something new

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i don't think this is true at all.

i think he planned on making the first movie of a trilogy and that those that came after him would have the same ideas about SW that he does. meaning mostly that it's not to be taken particularly seriously and it's mostly harmless fun that can be inspiring and moving.

Johnson wanted to make War & Peace but Star Wars and Disney panicked and asked JJ to pick up the pieces and he couldn't. However, there's no excusing him working with Terrio to write the script. Terrio is a major league hack.

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That problem can’t really be fixed at this point.

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At this point, no it can't. But JJ could have very easily have retconned Luke's death, and rebuilt the finish from there. Straight from the hip...

Luke didn't die at the end of TLJ, he just merged his physical presence with his force projection and poof he shows up in the cockpit of the falcon with the 6 remaining members of the resistance.

He then says something like "Chewie, set a course for New Alderan. We are going to need the New Republic Fleet."

The New Republic Fleet is commanded by Admiral Antilles who had kind of turned his back on Leia when it became public that Darth Vader was her father. You can retcon and make Raymus Antilles, who was the Captain of the Tantive Iv, and was murdered by Vader in A New Hope Wedge's father. Wedge agrees, they must go after the first order, but can't do it without direction form the Senate.

Leia and Chewie head to Bespin to convince Senator Calrissian to get the Seante to declare war.

While that is going on Kylo and his Knights of Ren are searching out a dark presence he felt in the Force. He fears Snoke has somehow returned. Instead he discovers Palpatine is still alive. Palpatine explains that he learned the power to cheat death, but never shared it with Vader. He transferred his life force into various hosts including Snoke, but has returned to his own body which his spirit influenced the midi-chlorians to create.

Kylo apprentices himself to Palpatine to become Darth Something. He gives Palpatine Snoke's ring which some how reinvigorates Palpatine.

Rey continues her training with Luke and Leia but the re-emergnce of Palpatine sends tremors through the Force which kill Leia. Luke is able to survive but is gravely weakened and sends Rey to face Palpatine, but stresses the lesson he learned on the Death Star, that only through compassion can the Sith be defeated.

Leia and Anakin start to reach out to Ben through the Force. Anakin urges Ben to return to the light before he suffers a fate similar to his own. Ben Mirrors Vader's language about it being too late for him.

Poe and Chewie and Wedge head off to destroy Palpatines fleet before it can get fully mobilized.

Rey shows up and is fighting the Knights of Ren, but is overpowered and captured by Kylo. Luke feels her pain, and goes to rescue her. Even in his weakened state he kills the Knights of Ren with ease.

He confronts the Emperor and Kylo as they try to turn Rey. Luke asks Kylo to return to the light using the same language Leia and Anakin had. Palpatine shoots lighting at Luke throwing him to the floor.

Kylo engages Rey and taunts her about how the power of the dark side will always prevail, and how weak Luke is. All through their duel Anakin is pleading with Kylo to stop what he's doing. As he overtakes Rey and Palpatine goads him to kill her the conflict boils over. Kylo throws his lightsaber down and attempts to attack Palpatine. Palpatine turns his lightning on Kylo stating that since he can't handle the power of the Dark Side maybe Rey can. Rey yells never and jumps in front of the lightning absorbing it with Anakins saber. Luke tosses his saber to Kylo who also begins to absorb the blasts.

Then Anakin emerges from the force and possesses Palpatine taking control of his spirit and dragging it into the netherworld of the force where dark side spirits can't exist. Palpatines body explodes.

New Republic fleet finishes off Palps fleet.

Celebration on New Alderon.

Show an epilogue with Luke teaching a clan of younglings with Rey and Ben instructing their own older padawans. Anakin, Obi-Wan, Leia, and Yoda all look on.

Yeah you lost me at the end of your fan fic there. And no Babu Frik? What’s wrong with you?