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An apology to biscuits & gravy from Japan

Posted on 6/13/26 at 10:56 am
Posted by hawgfaninc
https://youtu.be/torc9P4-k5A
Member since Nov 2011
63926 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 10:56 am

quote:

USA. A breakfast counter. The waitress recommended the biscuits and gravy, and when the plate arrived, I thought something had gone wrong in the kitchen.

I say this with shame. The dish looked like a construction site after rain. Pale mounds. Gray ladle-fall. Speckles I could not identify.

In my land, the eye eats first. A meal is arranged like a garden. This meal was arranged like weather.

"Is it… finished?" I asked, carefully.

"Honey, that's what it looks like."

The man beside me was already eating his. He did not look up. "Just try it."

I am a man who has charged hillsides at dawn. I raised the fork. I tried it.

I must now formally apologize to the biscuits, the gravy, the waitress, the kitchen, and the entire breakfast tradition of the American South.

It was magnificent. Warm. Peppered. The biscuit drank the gravy the way a field drinks rain — THAT is why it is shaped like that, you fool — and every mound I had insulted was a soft fold of comfort that my homeland, in eight hundred years, never once thought to invent.

"Well?" the waitress asked.

"I judged it," I confessed. "By its appearance. I am ashamed."

"Everybody does, hon."

Everybody does. A national dish that forgives you for doubting it. It expects the doubt. It waits for you on the other side of it.

Do not judge the gravy by its face. Judge yourself, for hesitating.

I order it every Saturday now. I no longer see the construction site. I see only the garden.

It was a garden the whole time. The eye must be trained.

Posted by WheyCheddar
Member since Aug 2024
1608 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 11:39 am to
Redneck goop. Biscuits and gravy suck.
Posted by LemmyLives
Texas
Member since Mar 2019
16641 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 2:29 pm to
quote:

Redneck goop.

You probably eat cheese curds, heathen.
Posted by Raoul Stimulato
Hale Bopp Comet
Member since Sep 2022
2387 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 5:51 pm to
quote:

Biscuits and gravy suck


Someone had to say it.
Posted by X123F45
Member since Apr 2015
29877 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 7:11 pm to
quote:

You probably eat cheese curds, heathen.


If you're north of I10 you're a Yankee to me... But cheese curds get a pass. A delicious squeaky pass.
Posted by tiggerfan02 2021
HSV
Member since Jan 2021
4200 posts
Posted on 6/13/26 at 10:08 pm to
Cheese curds are great. So are biscuits and gravy.

The poster you are replying too is an idiot.
Posted by HeyCap
Member since Nov 2014
1098 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 3:41 am to
I’ll take biscuits and gravy any day over nattõ.
Posted by USEyourCURDS
Member since Apr 2016
12941 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 8:57 am to
quote:

You probably eat cheese curds, heathen.


HEY!

Posted by MobileJosh
On the go
Member since May 2018
1337 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 9:19 am to
quote:

If you're north of I10 you're a Yankee to me..



That's because you're a stupid uncouth mongrel of a fat frick with no sense of geography or history.
Posted by sgallo3
Lake Charles
Member since Sep 2008
27497 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 9:20 am to
If you dont like biscuits and gravy you havent ever had them properly made. Which is weird because they arent hard to make.
Posted by marcus3000
Member since Jan 2018
979 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 1:23 pm to
Takes like this remind me how far the F&D board, and TD in general, has fallen.
Posted by Chucktown_Badger
The banks of the Ashley River
Member since May 2013
37299 posts
Posted on 6/14/26 at 2:00 pm to
Every time I consider biscuits and gravy I’ll ask if the gravy is homemade. If not it’s an automatic no.
Posted by riverdiver
Summerville SC
Member since May 2022
3035 posts
Posted on 6/15/26 at 7:03 am to
quote:

Redneck goop. Biscuits and gravy suck.


You obviously haven’t had good biscuits and gravy.
Posted by jchamil
Member since Nov 2009
19622 posts
Posted on 6/15/26 at 10:19 am to
quote:

Redneck goop. Biscuits and gravy suck.


Damn, man card taken for admitting you can't properly cook biscuits and gravy
Posted by GoCrazyAuburn
Member since Feb 2010
41409 posts
Posted on 6/15/26 at 10:35 am to
His posts have been great. His chips and salsa one was pretty hilarious too.
Posted by Havoc
Member since Nov 2015
39387 posts
Posted on 6/15/26 at 2:58 pm to
That’s excellent
Posted by X123F45
Member since Apr 2015
29877 posts
Posted on 6/16/26 at 5:07 am to
quote:

That's because you're a stupid uncouth mongrel of a fat frick with no sense of geography or history.


Look everyone, a Yankee.
Posted by HueyLongJr
Member since Oct 2007
1091 posts
Posted on 6/16/26 at 12:00 pm to
No true japanese can react with confusion to anything served in the US. Japan is a food freak show from top to bottom.
Posted by Jmcc64
alabama
Member since Apr 2021
2267 posts
Posted on 6/16/26 at 7:31 pm to
don't sleep on Grits and Gravy. especially from kansas city
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