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Started By
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Any of y'all been burned loaning a family member or friend money?
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:06 pm
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:06 pm
I am trying to talk my fiancee out of doing this. It's 9k to her sister for some dental work. She has asked for money before but never even in the ballpark of this much and I know she will never see it again. Her sister also went on two fricking vacations last year and has a vehicle she has zero business having. Share your horror stories if you have them
89
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:07 pm to Cregg
Sure. Not to the tune of 9 grand, but around half of that.
They're family. What can you do?
They're family. What can you do?
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:08 pm to Cregg
Have to treat this stuff as a gift or not do it all if you value the relationship IMO
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:08 pm to Cregg
Yep. When you make the decision to loan family/friends money you have to also make the decision to be at peace with not getting that money back. If you can't do that, don't loan them the money.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:08 pm to Cregg
quote:
9k
quote:
Her sister also went on two fricking vacations last year and has a vehicle she has zero business having
nope
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:09 pm to Cregg
If you want a family member to hate you... loan them money. It happens alot.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:10 pm to Cregg
The odds are not in your favor of recouping. Best to just consider it a gift. Approach it as, and communicate with the recipient as a loan though.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:11 pm to Cregg
Sign her rock chewing arse up for care credit.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:11 pm to Cregg
quote:
Her sister also went on two fricking vacations last year and has a vehicle she has zero business having.
Are you wealthy? If do give her the money, you wont see any back.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:12 pm to Cregg
quote:
I am trying to talk my fiancee out of doing this. It's 9k to her sister for some dental work. She has asked for money before but never even in the ballpark of this much and I know she will never see it again. Her sister also went on two fricking vacations last year and has a vehicle she has zero business having. Share your horror stories if you have them
Why can’t she put it on a credit card or finance plan through the dentist?
The sister has no problem doing the same for her vacations and high car payment . Guessing she didn’t ask to borrow money for her trips. Nah fam . If she was legit poor with no pot to pee in, I’d likely give it to her but her priorities are clearly out of whack
Tough shite
This post was edited on 2/7/26 at 4:13 pm
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:13 pm to Cregg
Is it emergency dental work? Like she has a broken jaw or lost her teeth in a wreck or could die if she doesn’t have it now?
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:13 pm to Cregg
What's 9k mean to you?
That should answer the question.
That should answer the question.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:15 pm to AgCoug
She can make better choices. Like trade in the car for something less expensive (ETA: and use the leftover cash to fix her rotten arse teeth.) She can also get a second opinion. And i bet even if you do decide to set this money on fire, she'll object to you going to the dentist and paying them directly.
And to the poster after you, it's not OP choosing to negatively impact the relationship over money, it's the sister.
And to the poster after you, it's not OP choosing to negatively impact the relationship over money, it's the sister.
This post was edited on 2/7/26 at 4:21 pm
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:15 pm to Gifman
Just know when you marry this woman, her sister will continue to ask for money. I had to put my foot down with my wife over two of her brothers who she “loaned” money to consistently. I finally had to tell them to kick rocks. She was very thankful that I did it because she could not say no. She is very kind hearted and wants to help, I told there is a difference between helping and being taken advantage of.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:18 pm to AgCoug
quote:
They're family. What can you do?
1. Tell them to eat shite.
2. Make fun of them for being poor.
3. Show them the cool new stuff you bought with your money
4. All of the above
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:18 pm to Cregg
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:19 pm to Cregg
Always follow Sonny’s advice…
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:19 pm to Cregg
Absolutely not. You dont borrow money from other adults. Use a bank or go without.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:20 pm to Cregg
We loaned both my mom and my wife's mom a couple grand each at various points. We didn't expect to get paid back and were cool with it.
Both those classy, beautiful women came with money in hand to repay.
Any other time it has been a relatively small amount and I forgot about it soon after giving it. Pretty sure none of those were paid back.
For 9k, I'd get something in writing. That's a bit over our forget about it threshold.
Both those classy, beautiful women came with money in hand to repay.
Any other time it has been a relatively small amount and I forgot about it soon after giving it. Pretty sure none of those were paid back.
For 9k, I'd get something in writing. That's a bit over our forget about it threshold.
Posted on 2/7/26 at 4:21 pm to Cregg
Probably everyone who has loaned family or a friend money has been burned.
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