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Message
re: Pondering Life With My Situation
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:57 pm to Joshjrn
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:57 pm to Joshjrn
quote:
If you’ve tried therapy and it didn’t work, I would consider trying a few more therapists. See if one clicks with you. If not, I might consider finding a life/career coach. I know people who swear by them, as a good coach will help you stay focused on goals and call you out on your bull shite when needed. Might help you find some direction and purpose.
And if all else fails, just focus on making at least one person’s life easier every day. That’s plenty enough purpose in life, if you let it be.
Anyway, no matter what you choose to do, I hope thinks are a bit less grey for you going forward. We only get one shot at this life, and I wish you all the best in yours
Good advice and I know I just need to do it. I've heard it all before. I'll admit though I disagree with the last part. I really hope we get more than one shot at life. I hope in my next life I'll have a better body. One can hope right?
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:57 pm to TheCoastalMan
(no message)
This post was edited on 7/5/23 at 9:49 pm
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:58 pm to TheCoastalMan
Do you go to church? If not give it a shot
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:59 pm to TheCoastalMan
Find a different doctor who will get to the root of your medical issues
Find a hobby & give dating a chance
Life is what you make it, 40 is too young to give up
I sincerely hope you get help & are able to find happiness
Find a hobby & give dating a chance
Life is what you make it, 40 is too young to give up
I sincerely hope you get help & are able to find happiness
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:59 pm to TheCoastalMan
Surrender yourself to the lord and let him guide you through this.
Praying for you brother
Praying for you brother
Posted on 7/4/23 at 7:59 pm to TheCoastalMan
What do you do that you actually enjoy?
Focus on that. frick all the rest.
ETA: And look into the indoor air quality at your house/work.
Focus on that. frick all the rest.
ETA: And look into the indoor air quality at your house/work.
This post was edited on 7/4/23 at 8:02 pm
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:00 pm to TheCoastalMan
Sending prayers. I hope you find healing and a will to live your life.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:00 pm to TheCoastalMan
quote:
Good advice and I know I just need to do it. I've heard it all before. I'll admit though I disagree with the last part. I really hope we get more than one shot at life. I hope in my next life I'll have a better body. One can hope right?
Hey, why not. If anything, that should give you more incentive. Most belief systems that believe in reincarnation judge what you do in this life in determining what kind of life you get in the next. Make this life everything you can make of it under the circumstances and build up that sweet, sweet karma
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:01 pm to StringedInstruments
Get a hobby, get in the gym as much as your illness allows try to get in the best shape of your life. Go to church, try being more social and find a support base.
Listen man, as somebody who has been around somebody who struggled with similar issues, your attitude is the most important thing. Be positive, be active. Life changes quickly, but you have to take the first steps.
Listen man, as somebody who has been around somebody who struggled with similar issues, your attitude is the most important thing. Be positive, be active. Life changes quickly, but you have to take the first steps.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:02 pm to Napoleon
quote:
I have some heart issues that keep getting worse.
Fearing a shortened life I separated from my wife so I can just travel and have fun.
No sense in being in a miserable relationship if I will never reach retirement age.
I've seriously considered this as well Just leaving my job and traveling as much as I can with my condition as I don't think I'll reach retirement age. Spend all my money and then go out.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:02 pm to TheCoastalMan
Everyone's life has value. Someone seeing you deal with your medical issues may have given hope to someone you don't even know. I've gone though a bunch of medical problems since February - indeed, seeing another doctor tomorrow. There are people who are dealing with far more serious problems. It keeps me grateful.
I agree with the suggestions that perhaps you move to a place which will be easier on your breathing problems. Get outside of yourself and help one less fortunate. You will appreciate your life more.
Prayer can't hurt and I'll say one for you. Best wishes.
I agree with the suggestions that perhaps you move to a place which will be easier on your breathing problems. Get outside of yourself and help one less fortunate. You will appreciate your life more.
Prayer can't hurt and I'll say one for you. Best wishes.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:02 pm to nolaTiger24
You make it sound you are certain you have no hope for your future. You'd be correct without Jesus.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:04 pm to TheCoastalMan
Be a man
Control your own destiny.
God bless your path
Control your own destiny.
God bless your path
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:04 pm to TheCoastalMan
Find something you can do for others with zero ability/expectation to return you the favor or pay you back.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:05 pm to TheCoastalMan
Sell everything, move to Thailand, and find you a hot Asian wife. Life will get better
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:05 pm to TheCoastalMan
Find what joy you can in life and fight. Fight like it’s the only shot you’ve got.
This isn’t the attitude you need. If you hate your job quit and find a new one, you don’t have a wife and kids so there is nothing else you need to support except for yourself. Keep your head up, find the good in life. Whatever that calling/hobby that may be.
quote:
if I want to move it it'll involve significant work that I really don't want to do
This isn’t the attitude you need. If you hate your job quit and find a new one, you don’t have a wife and kids so there is nothing else you need to support except for yourself. Keep your head up, find the good in life. Whatever that calling/hobby that may be.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:07 pm to TigerinSC
quote:
get out and get living. Get into some good hobbies and look for a release. Golf, fishing, shooting, bowling, hiking, jogging.
No. Hell no! This is what you are running from. This is a prescription for a meaningless life, and that’s what you already have. Start helping other people. This is what will make you happy.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:07 pm to TheCoastalMan
quote:
I've tried therapy but it's a lot of meaningless platitudes/exercises.
I had to go through multiple therapists before I found one that worked for me.
Good luck
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:07 pm to nolaTiger24
quote:
Get a hobby, get in the gym as much as your illness allows try to get in the best shape of your life. Go to church, try being more social and find a support base.
Listen man, as somebody who has been around somebody who struggled with similar issues, your attitude is the most important thing. Be positive, be active. Life changes quickly, but you have to take the first steps.
And maybe that's the worst part of all. I hate myself. I'm my own worst critic. I'm sure my mental health doesn't help my physical health. I just feel so defective. Like I'll always be different. Like I'll never be normal. I just feel like I lost the genetic lottery and internally yes I do whine and cry about it like I'm some kid. I know I shouldn't and I know there are people younger than me who have things like cancer, heart attacks, heart conditions, ALS, things that are scarier than what I have, but I just feel so alone and like I can't do this myself anymore. But unlike cancer or heart conditions there aren't really support groups for what I have. It's horrible when you're out somewhere and cough a few times and everyone looks at you like you have the black plague. I understand it but I feel powerless.
As an introvert I love being by myself by nature but I know it doesn't help me long term. I want to feel like some of my best days are still ahead of me and that my best days aren't all behind me. I guess I just feel like no one cares and the few people that would care (some family and close friends) I don't want to a bother to. Plus I live away from family so there's not much they can do and I'd never move back to where I'm from. I guess at the end of the day I need to figure out how to attack this thing instead of letting it define me. That's the thing, I feel like I'm so defined by my medical conditions now. I don't feel like I'm anything else anymore and that's what I need to defeat.
Posted on 7/4/23 at 8:08 pm to TheCoastalMan
A few times in life I felt in a similar situation.
Especially in that area, I still hung in there and am doing better today. I'm fortunate though to have had a unique career in the 90s and 2000s that I was able to land a woman 10 years younger than me and who is still a model. We have been together now for 8 years. Had I not put myself out there, people wouldn't have remembered me or found me interesting.
Sometimes look to your past for things you may have overlooked. That is part of looking forward, the ability to see/look in multiple directions. You probably appealed to more people than you give yourself credit for, especially when in a slump.
quote:
I'm single with no wife or kids to be responsible for. I used to think that's what I wanted but honestly it can get pretty lonely at times
Especially in that area, I still hung in there and am doing better today. I'm fortunate though to have had a unique career in the 90s and 2000s that I was able to land a woman 10 years younger than me and who is still a model. We have been together now for 8 years. Had I not put myself out there, people wouldn't have remembered me or found me interesting.
Sometimes look to your past for things you may have overlooked. That is part of looking forward, the ability to see/look in multiple directions. You probably appealed to more people than you give yourself credit for, especially when in a slump.
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