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Message
You ever discovered an immediate relative whom you weren't aware of? - Update on Page 6
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:29 pm
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:29 pm
My wife got me a 23&me kit for Christmas a few years ago. Back in February, I got the automated email from 23&me - You have new DNA relatives! Usually it's 3rd and 4th cousins I've never heard of, but I always check to see who it is, if I recognize the names, etc. but I was stunned to learn I have a 30 year old daughter.
I've had very profound emotions over this as has my wife, whose feelings don't exactly match mine. I've messaged the daughter, she was told a big story about who her dad was and we realized none of it's true. I'm a bit tempted to reach out to the mother but would probably do more harm than good at this point.
It's a weird set of circumstances. Situations like this with Ancestry.com & 23andme.com becoming so prevalent have created a cottage industry of people who facilitate connections or provide counseling because these discoveries can be really tough (I think my daughter is going through something over this discovery.) I've spoken to a counselor and the message is just be patient, go slow. Just wondering if any of yall gone through something similar?
I've had very profound emotions over this as has my wife, whose feelings don't exactly match mine. I've messaged the daughter, she was told a big story about who her dad was and we realized none of it's true. I'm a bit tempted to reach out to the mother but would probably do more harm than good at this point.
It's a weird set of circumstances. Situations like this with Ancestry.com & 23andme.com becoming so prevalent have created a cottage industry of people who facilitate connections or provide counseling because these discoveries can be really tough (I think my daughter is going through something over this discovery.) I've spoken to a counselor and the message is just be patient, go slow. Just wondering if any of yall gone through something similar?
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 5:38 pm
55
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:31 pm to Naked Bootleg
quote:
My wife got me a 23&me kit for Christmas a few years ago. Back in February, I got the automated email from 23&me - You have new DNA relatives! Usually it's 3rd and 4th cousins I've never heard of, but I always check to see who it is, if I recognize the names, etc. but I was stunned to learn I have a 30 year old daughter.
I've had very profound emotions over this as has my wife, whose feelings don't exactly match mine. I've messaged the daughter, she was told a big story about who her dad was and we realized none of it's true. I'm a bit tempted to reach out to the mother but would probably do more harm than good at this point.
It's a weird set of circumstances. Situations like this with Ancestry.com & 23andme.com becoming so prevalent have created a cottage industry of people who facilitate connections or provide counseling because these discoveries can be really tough (I think my daughter is going through something over this discovery.) I've spoken to a counselor and the message is just be patient, go slow. Just wondering if any of yall gone through something similar?
see this mother fricking shite right here......yea thats why i dont do the the DNA kit shite. frick all that!!!
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:31 pm to Naked Bootleg
quote:
I was stunned to learn I have a 30 year old daughter.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:32 pm to Naked Bootleg
Don't believe that DNA bullshite. It almost screwed OJ.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:32 pm to Naked Bootleg
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:32 pm to Naked Bootleg
quote:
You ever discovered an immediate relative whom you weren't aware of?
this happens to everyone who wins the lottery
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:33 pm to lsu777
quote:
thats why i dont do the the DNA kit shite. frick all that!!!
I don't even want to know
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:34 pm to Naked Bootleg
quote:
I've messaged the daughter, she was told a big story about who her dad was and we realized none of it's true. I'm a bit tempted to reach out to the mother but would probably do more harm than good at this point.
You just messaged a girl out of the blue to tell her you're her real dad instead of trying to contact the mother you banged first? I guess that's one way to go about it
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:35 pm to efrad
quote:
I was stunned to learn I have a 30 year old daughter.
1/2 page in and the usual questions have not been addressed.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:35 pm to Naked Bootleg
I work with a guy in a similar situation. He had no idea that he had a 10 year old daughter. The mom told some other dude he was the dad. When they got divorced they did a paternity test and boom..... he was not the dad. Mom contacted my co worker and after a test.... he was the dad. He's doing everything possible to have a relationship with the child. The daughter lives 4 hours away and he drives 16 total hours every other weekend to spend time with her.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:35 pm to Naked Bootleg
Details?
How old are you?
Is the mom an ex-gf or a one night stand?
You even remember her?
Did wife know about the mom previously?
What was the mom's story about your daughter's "dad"
Cmon baw
How old are you?
Is the mom an ex-gf or a one night stand?
You even remember her?
Did wife know about the mom previously?
What was the mom's story about your daughter's "dad"
Cmon baw
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:36 pm to Naked Bootleg
Definitely not wild about using those 23 and me services. But this isn't why.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:36 pm to jchamil
I’m sure that she received a similar notification from the DNA test service letting her know that she matched with someone close enough to be her father
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:37 pm to Naked Bootleg
No, I’m not trashy
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:37 pm to Naked Bootleg
My mom refuses to do this because she doesn’t want to find out she has half-siblings in Germany and France.
This post was edited on 10/14/21 at 1:37 pm
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:37 pm to terriblegreen
quote:
The daughter lives 4 hours away and he drives 16 total hours every other weekend to spend time with her.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:38 pm to Naked Bootleg
A. I would never do this 23&me shite.
B. How long have you and your wife been together?
B. How long have you and your wife been together?
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:38 pm to LSUisKING
Probably picks her up, brings her to his place, brings her back, and comes home over the course of one weekend
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:38 pm to teke184
Just know that whatever you are feeling and the emotions that you have, its probably 10 times that for your daughter.
Posted on 10/14/21 at 1:39 pm to Epic Cajun
quote:
B. How long have you and your wife been together?
31 years
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