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Posted on 3/12/26 at 11:50 am to fareplay
It’s not that bad. 5 kids.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 11:51 am to waiting4saturday
That’s crazy boss. How many generations of people helped you raise em
Posted on 3/12/26 at 11:53 am to fareplay
I found that the 2nd one is easier to raise because I have all this experience now. The hard part taking time for each individual kid, your wife and yourself.
In public, I have to know keep eyes on two kids. That can be stressful.
As they’ve gotten older, it’s been easier.
For reference, my kids are 2 years apart.
In public, I have to know keep eyes on two kids. That can be stressful.
As they’ve gotten older, it’s been easier.
For reference, my kids are 2 years apart.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 11:55 am to fareplay
If you’re not a troll, I feel for your kid.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 11:57 am to fareplay
Dude, I went from 2 to 4 overnight. If you have to ask, you wouldn't make it. You have to switch from man to zone when that happens and pray they don't realize they have the numbers.
This post was edited on 3/12/26 at 11:58 am
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:04 pm to Cosmo
quote:
Somehow the human race raised kids just fine for thousands of years while at the same time struggling to survive day to day
Division of domestic labor.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:07 pm to fareplay
quote:
Because shite costs less and people had more time back then. My wife and I both work full time jobs. Also for those saying oh just pay a nanny etc. you have any idea how expensive they are?
You never mentioned the cost as a reason why you don’t want a second kid, you expressly listed:
quote:
First one about to hit 2, wife says want second but I can’t imagine doing this again. Kids are so damn hard to raise and the future don’t look so bright these days.
Parents of the Ot with 2+, how hard was it
quote:
How is this possible? We’re in toddler stage and I have no time to think.
quote:
Wife’s pov is she wants kids to play together so can’t be too far age gap.
My pov is I want to retire and have a functioning adult brain
If you say you fear the financial strain a second child would have on you, that’s completely different than “I’m tired”.
Finances are why my wife and I stopped at 2. Also the youngest was out of diapers and frick going back to that.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:08 pm to fareplay
1 to 2 was more difficult than 2 to 3 for us.
It is an adjustment, but it isn't inherently more difficult. You know have to handle a toddler and still handle a newborn. Once you get into a rhythm, it is not bad. My kids are all under 8 so I do not have advice beyond that.
TL;DR - You seem to have doubts, which is normal, but make sure you sort that out before making your decision.
It is an adjustment, but it isn't inherently more difficult. You know have to handle a toddler and still handle a newborn. Once you get into a rhythm, it is not bad. My kids are all under 8 so I do not have advice beyond that.
TL;DR - You seem to have doubts, which is normal, but make sure you sort that out before making your decision.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:15 pm to fareplay
A comedian once said: having a second child is comparable to being in the middle of a lake drowning and someone hands you a baby.
I found it pretty damn funny, but I have to disagree. My second child( girl) was not planned, and I was scared as can be, but she is a blessing beyond my wildest dreams. I would definitely have another if me and my wife were young enough.
I found it pretty damn funny, but I have to disagree. My second child( girl) was not planned, and I was scared as can be, but she is a blessing beyond my wildest dreams. I would definitely have another if me and my wife were young enough.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:19 pm to fareplay
2 kids are easy, even at that age. 3 kids not terrible. I found going from 3 to 4, you realize your “me” time is at 5:30am-6:30am or after 9pm. And time with just you and your wife is extremely limited, but you need to carve out that time for both of you at least a few times a week.
Parenting is the hardest but greatest thing on earth. You learn as the days progress and adjust. Have to be selfless at many points, but if you have open communication with your spouse and keep your priorities in order, it can be very manageable.
Don’t let it stress you…embrace the chaos because you will miss it when it’s gone.
Parenting is the hardest but greatest thing on earth. You learn as the days progress and adjust. Have to be selfless at many points, but if you have open communication with your spouse and keep your priorities in order, it can be very manageable.
Don’t let it stress you…embrace the chaos because you will miss it when it’s gone.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:26 pm to fareplay
you never regret having the kid. Just remember that. It will be true no matter how many you have.
Speaking as a parent of 3.
Speaking as a parent of 3.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:27 pm to fareplay
quote:
My pov is I want to retire and have a functioning adult brain
Then the earlier you have kids the better. The longer you wait, the harder things get for retirement age.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:30 pm to Dragula
quote:Disagree completely
Buckle up, there’s a bigger jump going from 1 to 2 children than 0 to 1 child.
0 to 1 is the biggest change to your life you will ever experience. You go from no real stress of having to give up anything to living for someone else
1 to 2 was so much less of a life chance. 2 to 3 even less than that
Nothing is as dramatic as going from childless to having a kid
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:41 pm to fareplay
My wife and I have raised 6 and spread them out a bit. Ranging from 21 to 43 now. We are having 3 of them with their spouses and 3 grand kids home this weekend. It is awesome when we get to have this many home at one time! We had two playing baseball and one playing softball at the same time but were able to walk back and forth from games when they were playing. Fun times!
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:44 pm to fareplay
Wife and I always wanted a second child, but our first is on the spectrum and will probably live with us his whole life. He's not bad, just has some logic and critical thinking issues. It's been much more difficult than raising a normally progressing child.
We were afraid of having a second child that may be born autistic non-verbal or something worse. That may sound selfish, but I don't think I could handle a child like that after going through the first one.
It will be a major life regret though.
We were afraid of having a second child that may be born autistic non-verbal or something worse. That may sound selfish, but I don't think I could handle a child like that after going through the first one.
It will be a major life regret though.
This post was edited on 3/12/26 at 2:52 pm
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:47 pm to notsince98
quote:Very true. I was sweating when we found out we were expecting child #4. How are we going to afford this?
you never regret having the kid.
She’s 4 now and I can’t imagine life without her.
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:47 pm to fareplay
quote:
Wife’s pov is she wants kids to play together so can’t be too far age gap.
My pov is I want to retire and have a functioning adult brain
Have the second kid. Only children are never fully adjusted. No matter how well mannered and well raised, they are always a bit selfish... Based on your OP, are you an only child?
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:51 pm to Oilfieldbiology
quote:
Finances are why my wife and I stopped at 2. Also the youngest was out of diapers and frick going back to that.
Do you live in my house?
Posted on 3/12/26 at 12:53 pm to fareplay
quote:
How is this possible? We’re in toddler stage and I have no time to think.
Have two and you’ll realize what an idiot you are right now when you have even less time to think
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