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re: What would you do - encourage your child to have an extravagant wedding or take the money?
Posted on 8/3/23 at 9:49 am to SwampyWaters
Posted on 8/3/23 at 9:49 am to SwampyWaters
I'm glad the gf and I won't be having a big wedding (or possibly a wedding at all). We will be throwing a big party in possibly two states.
1
Posted on 8/3/23 at 10:25 am to SwampyWaters
quote:You are shite out of luck Swampy. If her parents are paying for a wedding that will have 125 at the damn rehearsal dinner alone, then they aren't the kind to scale down a wedding that will very likely have +500 people in attendance.
Her parents are paying for the wedding, but we still have some costs also. Have you seen how much a rehearsal dinner at a nice restaurant for around 125 people (they also like to drink) costs?
I'm just trying to get them to cut down on everything and save a lot of that money for something that will benefit them for many years.
Save up man, the groom's portion is going to take a bite out of your wallet.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 10:29 am to SwampyWaters
quote:Money, easily.
What would you do - encourage your child to have an extravagant wedding or take the money?
A standard wedding can be just as awesome and fun and whatever else you make it to be as an expensive wedding.
I essentially agree with everything you said but in this case, I think you sit them down and have a talk with them, put your opinions out there lightly and don't do the back and forth thing, but ultimately you don't push it and let them make the decision they want to make.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:32 pm to SwampyWaters
Pretty sad people are totally fine with pissing away their parents money. Even more sad the parents go along with it.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:38 pm to danilo
Take the money and put a down payment on a house. To hell with a big wedding. Total waste of money.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:41 pm to notiger1997
quote:
Last I heard the minimum for a respectable wedding in Nola and this area is around $30k.
Way low unless you're 75 guests or under or are having the reception at a place with plastic tables
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:43 pm to SwampyWaters
quote:
scale back their wedding and put a large amount of their allotted money in an account
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:45 pm to SwampyWaters
My son got married 2 weeks ago. Huge wedding. Here’s my advice, spend the money on a great band and nothing else will be remembered. People don’t even remember if there was food at the reception, because the band was great!
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:47 pm to Jcorye1
quote:
I'm glad the gf and I won't be having a big wedding (or possibly a wedding at all). We will be throwing a big party in possibly two states.
This is a contradictory statement.
The wedding ceremony costs next to nothing. The party is expensive because feeding a bunch of people is expensive as hell.
This post was edited on 8/3/23 at 1:48 pm
Posted on 8/3/23 at 1:52 pm to SwampyWaters
Selling the idea of it being "her day" is a scam like Valentines Day.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 2:04 pm to LouisianaLady
quote:
This is a contradictory statement.
The wedding ceremony costs next to nothing. The party is expensive because feeding a bunch of people is expensive as hell.
I'm not sure how you came to this conclusion. One, we won't get hit with the "wedding tax" since it's literally not a wedding. Two, I'm relatively sure we can have a decent sized party at friends houses with catering and limited alcohol selections for pretty cheap, or at most we can rent out one of the dive bars we used to frequent for a couple of hours or so.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 2:21 pm to Jcorye1
Well for sure you can do it cheap. Drop catering, DIY bar, etc. is all cheaper than a traditional wedding.
I just see people say all the time what you said, because they think the act of having a formal ceremony is where the $$$ comes from.
I just see people say all the time what you said, because they think the act of having a formal ceremony is where the $$$ comes from.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 2:27 pm to LouisianaLady
Take the money. Got married last year. Did most everything ourselves including decorating. Food was all donated or paid just cost. Jambalaya, low country boil, Jamaican jerk chicken, and raw oysters with fixings. I bought the booze. Got away with around 6k for 200 people. Lots of friends owed up to favors over the years. Everyone said best food and wedding ever. Grandma made the cake and it was devoured in minutes.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 5:23 pm to LouisianaLady
quote:
Well for sure you can do it cheap. Drop catering, DIY bar, etc. is all cheaper than a traditional wedding.
I just see people say all the time what you said, because they think the act of having a formal ceremony is where the $$$ comes from.
I get what you're saying, I also just assume people are going all out for weddings nowadays. We are two decently thrifty CPAs so yeah not spending big bucks.Posted on 8/3/23 at 5:34 pm to RT1941
They have a list of a little more than 300, but I'm trying to get them to narrow it down to 225 and they could save 15-20 thousand that could go in the bank. Like I said before, it's their choice but I know most young married couples struggle financially in the first few years, but they have a chance to start off with a solid foundation. We still have a while to go, so we'll see what happens!
Posted on 8/3/23 at 5:50 pm to SwampyWaters
Wedding. I’ve paid for 2 of them and don’t regret a cent of it. My daughters would agree.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 5:52 pm to SwampyWaters
Take the money. As long as it's an open bar, it doesn't need to be some crazy arse venue.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 6:05 pm to SwampyWaters
quote:
Her parents are paying for the wedding
Then it's really not your business. If you think they should be gifted money to go towards a down payment on a house, go for it.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 6:13 pm to 777Tiger
quote:
big weddings/receptions are a huge waste of money
The difference is some people can afford to waste it. Not all of us are poor.
Posted on 8/3/23 at 6:25 pm to SwampyWaters
quote:
They have a list of a little more than 300, but I'm trying to get them to narrow it down to 225 and they could save 15-20 thousand that could go in the bank.
Did the bride's parents give them a fixed budget, and tell them they can keep the excess if they spend less?
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