re: Spanking a kid--where do you stand?

Spanking is a two edged sword. If used with restraint and a lighter hand, it can be a helpful disciplinary tool. But if you spank at the drop of a hat, or if the hand becomes too heavy (or the belt), it can become a weapon of abuse.

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Spanking is trashy

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how about a bitch slap across your face?

I look at this way...the belt worked on me. So it can work on my child too. Never beat a child though. There's a fine line...are you whipping for discipline or are you beating for getting rid of your anger....if it's the latter...stop what you are doing, that's child abuse.

I can say I got my fair share of beatings (mostly my mom who had a bad temper) and my fair share of whippings (from my dad who was cooler headed).

Also, always explain to the child what they did wrong. You may think it's petty or unimportant, but that's the MOST important thing you can do.

Depends on the child. I have one nephew you could just say a couple of terse words to and he was almost instantly morose. He knew what he had done and it was bad.

The other one though...


The most important thing is knowing the child well enough to know if spanking is warranted or will even work.

To instantly rule it out in any scenario though, that's a poor (potential) parent.

I generally dont spank, but will whip that arse for certain infractions.

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Each child is different. It's about finding a balance for each child. And the best research as to what works and what doesn't work for children is done by their parents.

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I agree. My oldest received many more spankings than my second. Probably because I was a new parent. We have to learn also. Partly because he was more determined to have his way and was naturally into his interests.
Once we had company and were sitting outside. My youngest was riding his bicycle repeatedly through a puddle of water. I told him to quit. He did it again. I told if he did it again that I was going to spank him. He rode to the puddle then stopped and looked at me. I gave him the meanest most threatening look that I could muster. He proceeded to ride through again. I got up and gave him a spanking. Later I asked him, why in spite or my warning, the mean threatening look, he went ahead and did what I told him no to do. He said Daddy, I thought you were smiling at me. Communication!
My oldest sucked his thumb until he was two or three. I told him one day that if he quit I would buy him the toy, "Six million dollar man". He agreed, so I bought the toy. He quit sucking his thumb, but I noticed one evening that he was anxious to go to bed. After a few minutes I quietly went into his bedroom and sure enough he was sucking his thumb. I took the toy and told him I was taking for a couple weeks and if he continued sucking his thumb I was going to put it in the trash. In a few days I gave it back and he never sucked his thumb again.
Psychologists say that was the wrong approach. Maybe? Today he is an Electrical Engineer, married for twenty years to the same woman, two healthy children.

i say maybe only certain reasons. kids tend to act up a good bit sometimes, you cant be hitting them every time

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i think if you're to the point where you think it's necessary, you've already fricked up some fundamentals of child rearing.

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what if you’ve raised a Child who was a good little child his entire life but he gets into middle school/high school and hanging out with his friends and just being a teenager he gets more and more disrespectful and eventually decides to tell his mother to go frick herself or when she or you asks him to do something around the house he refuses and if you try to take something away from him like his xbox or tv and he just says no and Takes it away from you? I think there comes a point in time to where for boys anyway, they need an arse whupping from their parents or at least the threat has to be there they know if they push it too far or they’ll end up getting their arse whipped by someone else in the long run and it may not be someone who’s gonna stop after a few swats on the butt.

I always thought I'd spank my kids, but then I had kids and my perspective changed. I've spanked my oldest once when he was 4, and it turns my stomach to think about still today because I did so out of anger. Have never spanked my daughter.