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Question to the parents of the OT…do you discipline each of your children differently?
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:14 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:14 pm
This is obviously for those that have more than one child.
While the rules should apply the same to each kid, is the amount of discipline given to each kid based strictly on the behavior of the child?
Or do you discipline each kid the exact same, no matter how bad they are?
While the rules should apply the same to each kid, is the amount of discipline given to each kid based strictly on the behavior of the child?
Or do you discipline each kid the exact same, no matter how bad they are?
14
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:15 pm to SPEEDY
Yes. I only hit my 4 month old. My 2 year old runs the house.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:17 pm to SPEEDY
I modulated the discipline to the offense. The kids who did the worst stuff caught more hell. Of my four kids, one got a true arse whipping and one got two of them. The other two never got more than a slap on the hand. I had three girls and a boy. Of course it was my son I had to whup twice. Little fugger!
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 4:18 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:17 pm to SPEEDY
I don’t mean to be, but i’m harder on my son than my daughter. Mostly because I want to toughen him up. Also, she’s got me wrapped around her finger
She just knows my weak spots better and plays them to her advantage.
She just knows my weak spots better and plays them to her advantage.
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 4:34 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:18 pm to SPEEDY
Yes. I'm naturally harder on the boy. But mom makes up for it by being harder on the girl.
Dad's and daughters, man. We can be such pushovers sometimes.
Eta: fr33manator gets it.
Dad's and daughters, man. We can be such pushovers sometimes.
Eta: fr33manator gets it.
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 4:19 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:18 pm to SPEEDY
Having two kids has taught me, over time, that each kids responds and reacts differently.
So yes, the forms of discipline we use for each child are different, because we have learned that what is impactful for each child is different.
Our older child, we get a better adjustment from her when we take away experiences - you can't go out tonight, you can't go to the mall on Saturday, etc. She could care less about losing her phone, her laptop, etc.
Our younger child, we get a better adjustment from taking away things - you have lost your ipad, you have lost your switch, etc. She could care less about not being able to go somewhere.
It's taken a number of years for us to understand this.
So yes, the forms of discipline we use for each child are different, because we have learned that what is impactful for each child is different.
Our older child, we get a better adjustment from her when we take away experiences - you can't go out tonight, you can't go to the mall on Saturday, etc. She could care less about losing her phone, her laptop, etc.
Our younger child, we get a better adjustment from taking away things - you have lost your ipad, you have lost your switch, etc. She could care less about not being able to go somewhere.
It's taken a number of years for us to understand this.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:20 pm to LSUFanHouston
Have 4 children. Can confirm what LSUhoustonfan said.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:20 pm to LSUFanHouston
Yes, I never hit my son, but do spank my teen daughters if they get out of line...
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 4:21 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:22 pm to fr33manator
quote:
I don’t mean to be, but i’m harder on my son than my daughter. Mostly because I want to toughen him up. Also, she’s got me wrapped around her finger
He’s going to resent you for that shite
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:24 pm to Joshjrn
Do discipline them differently, but only because they deserve it. One rarely falls out of line. The other one multiple times a day.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:25 pm to SPEEDY
i disciplined both kids (boys) incredibly different.
i could have beat the ever loving hell (i did not) out of my oldest and it would never budge on his behavior. i ground him from things, but moreso as punishment than discipline. it's not overly effective. he's an illogical teenager who has thought he was smarter than me since he was born. discipline for him is making him have a conversation and figure out where he was wrong and why he should apologize or change course.
my youngest is a people pleaser and spanking in his younger years and grounding is very effective.
they each can get away with and punished for different things based on their overall behavior and personalities.
e.g:
- if my youngest ever says "shut up" i'm not as likely to discipline him because he doesn't have a mean bone in his body and doesn't speak rudely ever. i know he's joking.
if my oldest says it he's immediately going to be in trouble because he's a smartass and doesn't say things jokingly.
- if my oldest leaves his room a mess, i'm going to make him clean it up, but it's not going to be a heavy punishment because he's good about cleaning up after himself as a general rule and i very rarely have to say anything about it.
my youngest never cleans up after himself and is more likely to get punished because he leaves messes regularly.
i'm not saying i am letting either get away with that behavior, but both of them have some leeway based on their personalities.
i could have beat the ever loving hell (i did not) out of my oldest and it would never budge on his behavior. i ground him from things, but moreso as punishment than discipline. it's not overly effective. he's an illogical teenager who has thought he was smarter than me since he was born. discipline for him is making him have a conversation and figure out where he was wrong and why he should apologize or change course.
my youngest is a people pleaser and spanking in his younger years and grounding is very effective.
they each can get away with and punished for different things based on their overall behavior and personalities.
e.g:
- if my youngest ever says "shut up" i'm not as likely to discipline him because he doesn't have a mean bone in his body and doesn't speak rudely ever. i know he's joking.
if my oldest says it he's immediately going to be in trouble because he's a smartass and doesn't say things jokingly.
- if my oldest leaves his room a mess, i'm going to make him clean it up, but it's not going to be a heavy punishment because he's good about cleaning up after himself as a general rule and i very rarely have to say anything about it.
my youngest never cleans up after himself and is more likely to get punished because he leaves messes regularly.
i'm not saying i am letting either get away with that behavior, but both of them have some leeway based on their personalities.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:28 pm to SPEEDY
I discipline them the same. Kinda have to, in my opinion. but as they grew and my understanding of their very different natural personalities grew, I'd find ways to make sure the one who was more prone to get in trouble.. get in trouble with me before getting herself in trouble. If that makes sense.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:30 pm to MSMHater
quote:
Dad's and daughters, man. We can be such pushovers sometimes.
When they start crying we just want to make it stop.
The worst is when they get down on themselves.
“I’m a bad child. I’m dumb. I’m stupid.”
It hurts to hear them say those things. Especially when you fussed them for something that wasn’t that big a deal, like “stop throwing socks by the shelf with all sorts of expensive things on it.”
Their reaction sometimes to being scolded…you’d think I beat them with an electrical cord.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:31 pm to SPEEDY
quote:
do you discipline each of your children differently
Defiantly, while the rules are the same we do discipline each kid differently.
My oldest son (17) can be hardheaded as crap, he refuses to to follow rules no matter what the consequences. He stays in trouble at school for stupid stuff. He has been this way since he was little.
My youngest son (13) thinks his sh%^ don't stink but he responds well with me just talking to him or taking his phone away. It never gets to the point that i have to lock him down for weeks on end like his older brother.
I did use corporal punishment when they were younger but i realized quick for one kid it just made him act worse and the other didn't need it to straighten up.
I also try to cut some things off with my older son before they get started. Most days i send him a text after i leave the house, just reminding him if he wants to go hang out with friend on the weekend i expect him to behave a certain way.
My oldest is very frustrating because he refuses to acknowledge that anything he does was him. It is always teachers dont like him or they are lying on him.
My youngest is very quick to acknowledge that he made a mistake and wants to make amends.
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 4:40 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:32 pm to Joshjrn
quote:
He’s going to resent you for that shite
He’s already made comments that make me worry. About how he knows she’s my favorite. Which isn’t true. Daddy’s just have different relationships with their kids of different sexes.
Now that we have cribbage to play our relationship has gotten better. We were missing some crucial bonding.
All I can do is try to be a better dad. I can’t get the lost time back.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:42 pm to bigtiger440
quote:
My oldest is very frustrating because he refuses to acknowledge that anything he does was him. It is always teachers dont like him or they are lying on him.
my oldest is a complete and utter a-hole at home at times and his teachers all say he is incredibly kind, funny, and a model student and leader at school.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:46 pm to SPEEDY
Depends on the situation. I talk to my 13 year old son like he's a grown man. I make sure neither of them are disrespectful and always treat people the same no matter the person's plight in life.
But the main rule is to not act a fool in public. I'll go seven levels of crazy.
But the main rule is to not act a fool in public. I'll go seven levels of crazy.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:47 pm to SPEEDY
quote:
do you discipline each of your children differently?
At first I thought that said “despise” and I had a long list. I don’t have anything for discipline.
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:51 pm to LSUFanHouston
quote:
Having two kids has taught me, over time, that each kids responds and reacts differently.
This... I have two girls with two completely different personalities and values...
Rules are the same for both.. Correctional measures vary based upon the individual
This post was edited on 5/3/22 at 8:16 pm
Posted on 5/3/22 at 4:53 pm to SPEEDY
quote:
do you discipline each of your children differently?
Yes
I have a 9 year old female devil and a 6 year old male angel.
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