re: Prayers needed….any words of encouragement or advice.

Holy shite. That is awful. I’m not even sure what to say aside from try your best to keep your head up (easier said than done) and try to be as strong as you can for your kids. I’ve only been married for 3.5 years and I can’t imagine life without my wife and our son without her too.

I’ll be thinking about you and throwing some prayers toward you for sure. I can only hope time will help you deal with the grief you’re no doubt going through for a while.

As for posting, you do you. This place is a shithole sometimes but there is also a lot of honest compassion at times. And this place is actually fairly therapeutic for some people. So if posting this here and talking about it with strangers makes you feel better, then go for it and the people that don’t like it can frick right off. And you’ll also find that people here, while skeptical at times, they’re also pretty helpful to people who’ve fallen on tough times. Just ask Owlfan, as an easy example.

Damn, extremely sorry for your loss.

Your kids will need you more than ever, lean on those that love you.

May God bring peace to you & those children.

That is horrific; I am so sorry for what you have gone through and what you are faced with. I am praying for you and your children during this incredibly difficult time.

Praying for you and your children

I can’t imagine man. I have a 4 year old and another coming in a month or so. My wife is the rock in this whole deal. Get near family if you can. I can’t imagine doing this solo but you can. Your life is for those babies. YOUR KIDS ARE ALL THAT MATTERS. Stay in church. Find some sort of community. It takes a village is a saying for a reason. Good luck man. I wish I was closer to you and could help. If you ever want to talk/vent/want to visit the Florida panhandle hit me up. Weagletd@gmail

I’m so so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine losing my spouse. I’ll be thinking of you and your babies during these very hard times.

Please accept my sincerest Condolences...

Post away. There are people here that you can talk to... Nothing I can say right now will help. But whatever you do don't blame yourself or think what could have been. Take every day - day by day... You have a right to grieve.

First and foremost, I think everyone who has a beloved spouse deep down is terrified of the situation you’re going through. I know it’s something that can send me down an anxiety train just to think about so I’m so very sorry you’re having to experience the real thing.


I’ll only address some of the questions you posted because you brought them up, as normally I don’t say a thing to people in these circumstances. What can you say really? But for the purposes of your post, I’ll take a shot at it.


As a man of faith myself, it irritates me to no end to hear people tell others who have lost a loved one that they’re in a better place in the immediacy after the loss. Jesus knew he would resurrect Lazarus, yet still he wept. The pain is real. The sorrow is relentless and to simply try to comfort it away by “your wife is in heaven” to me, there are better options. Assuming your wife shared your faith and belief in God, she is indeed in a better place, but that’s a discussion for another time.


As for why would God allow such pain and suffering, there are certainly theological ideas we can kick around, but I think more important now is to point out that God hates sin & everything brought about by it including death, loss, sorrow, pain etc. He understands the pain and it gives him sorrow to see his loved children suffer through it. I absolutely understand being mad at him and I won’t at all lecture you on your grief, but I do still believe that even in this season, he is indeed near to broken-hearted and the crushed in spirit. You’ll certainly need community to get through this time, so your willingness to be open and at least post about it is encouraging that you’re open to said community, especially with the kids involved.

I’m incredibly sorry you and your family are having to go through this, and I do sincerely mean it when I say my heart aches for you and I absolutely have already prayed for your family before I even hit submit on this post. I just want to encourage you that you’re not alone, there is help and there is hope. I know there’s not much at all that can be said to ease the sting of the moment, so I’ll leave it simply at the fact that there is hope. There are people who will walk with you. There is hope for a brighter day. God bless you sir, and please don’t ever hesitate to ask for help.





Also, where are you located? I’m sure depending on where y’all live, someone can recommend a grief counselor in your area.

I am deeply sorry for your loss. You will have many people surround you to help you make decisions. Make changes slowly, and avail yourself and your kids to any counseling help you need. If you have a church, lean on the people there to help you and encourage you.

I have no wisdom to share other than God bless you and your family during this time.

Brother, I’m so sorry to hear this. My God bless you and your family through these trying times.