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SwampBandit
LSU Fan
Livonia, La
Member since Jun 2016
1496 posts

Parent Problems looking for advice
I am not doing this for no sob poor me stuff I am seriously wanting to know everyones input.

I am a married man in my upper 20's with a 3 year old daughter. I grew up in a very abusive household with a mentally and physically abusive father. My parent divorced when i was 10 however my dad stayed controlling my mom and I and he still does. After the divorce he never moved on which leaves me, my wife, and my kid the only people he has which leads to him bugging us all the time. When my child was first born he would see her once a week however he would still complain that it wasnt enough time. Prior to my child being born he got in a fight with me in front of my mom and Fiance at the time and said he was going to kill me, he has wished me and my wife would get in wreck with our unborn child, the list goes on... Our previous incident caused me and my wife to push him out pretty much and not let him around however he says we are crazy and that it is wrong that he is my daughters grandfather.... In these last few months i have noticed myself in a better mood because he im not letting him stress me out about time with my daughter...With all the things he has done from my childhood till recently he doesnt deserve to see me or my daughter in my eyes but am i wrong for that?

Sorry for the long story but i know somebody on here has to have went through similar problems


patnuh
LSU Fan
South LA
Member since Sep 2005
3104 posts
 Online 

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Tell him to hit the bricks.


MSMHater
Houston Astros Fan
Houston
Member since Oct 2008
20078 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
quote:

he doesnt deserve to see me or my daughter in my eyes


all that matters.


NoHoTiger
LSU Fan
Be nice to TigerPox
Member since Nov 2006
42828 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Your job as her father is to keep her safe from everyone. If you think he's capable of harming her in any way, keep her away.
This post was edited on 3/8 at 3:09 pm


tke857
UTEP Fan
From Where They Make Gumbo At
Member since Jan 2012
12088 posts
 Online 

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
You're the parent and you get to decided who interacts with your kid.

Your Dad sounds like a POS sorry to say. Prob best you keep him at an arms length (or more).


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730
1999
Maryland Fan
Where I be
Member since Oct 2009
18682 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
i wouldn't let him be with her unsupervised. not with that history.


geauxfortwo
LSU Fan
Livin the dream
Member since Jan 2018
316 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
speaking from experience, he's had his chance, time to cut bait


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670
Ash Williams
LSU Fan
South of i-10
Member since May 2009
14313 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Why would you want that man in your child's life?

Tell him to stay the frick away and if he tries to keep coming around get a fricking restraining order.


Dam Guide
New Orleans Saints Fan
Nooga
Member since Sep 2005
10301 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Cut him out if he can't be respectful. Deal with him on your own terms instead of letting him dictate them. He is not entitled to spend any time with his granddaughter, that is your and your wife's choice how much he gets to see her.


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270
lnomm34
USA Fan
Louisiana
Member since Oct 2009
10427 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
quote:

Prior to my child being born he got in a fight with me in front of my mom and Fiance at the time and said he was going to kill me, he has wished me and my wife would get in wreck with our unborn child, the list goes on and on


quote:

however he says we are crazy


The frick?


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90
GermantownTiger
LSU Fan
Member since Jan 2015
2678 posts
 Online 

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Profess your love to him


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47
rpr4695
LSU Fan
Member since May 2013
1164 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
I think your father proves that parental respect is earned. You’re not wrong.


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170
L S Usetheforce
LSU Fan
College Station
Member since Jun 2004
20572 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
If your dad said that shite....you should invite him over for a man to man conversation. Cook some steaks, beat his arse to a pulp and then let him know who runs shite now.

After this happens, he will respect you and you and your family can live in harmony.


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212
kingbob
LSU Fan
Sorrento, LA
Member since Nov 2010
43954 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
It's called a restraining order. You can get one that still allows limited supervised visitation rights.


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51
SwampBandit
LSU Fan
Livonia, La
Member since Jun 2016
1496 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
quote:

all that matters.


Yea im just tired of the text with the poor me shite and i dont know how much longer i got and so on. I told him i could fricken die this evening that im not living my life assuming he might be about to die to feel sorry for him and give in...

Im literally in the process of selling my house to get away because we cant even sit outside without feeling like he will pass by and he lives fricken 20 minutes away


GeorgeQGlass
Texas Fan
Austin
Member since Oct 2017
183 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
Leave him the frick out. Your kid doesn't need to be around all that shite. Nothing good will come of having him around her.

What exactly is he going to provide?

Tell him to get bent and stay the frick out of your life.


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101
Saskwatch
Ole Miss Fan
Member since Feb 2016
4443 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
I would tell him the GTFO and file some kind of restraining order. Grandparents aren't owed that time with YOUR child.


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50
lordguill
New Orleans Saints Fan
Member since Dec 2005
27289 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
This man’s presence in your life serves absolutely no purpose, and in fact, is completely detrimental.

Cut him loose.


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120
deeprig9
Georgia Fan
Near Athens
Member since Sep 2012
28989 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
My wife threw her dad out of her life around age 20. Reconnected age 30, forgave. Age 35, had to throw him out again.

He’s never met our kid either and probably never will.

It helps that he moved out of state, but going to family functions on that side of the family has to be coordinated so he won’t be there, which means we hardly ever see them, which is a shame because I like them.


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110
VABuckeye
Ohio State Fan
Oak Hill, VA
Member since Dec 2007
21629 posts

re: Parent Problems looking for advice
If your dad is a piece of shite it's ok for you to tell him he's a piece of shite and move on with your life. The fact that he's still your father doesn't change what he is or what he did.


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