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Started By
Message
Only In Louisiana...
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:18 am
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:18 am
So, I'm coming home to the palatial Pimp compound in St. George having left a dear friend's home just before midnight last night- in the greater Raceland-Matthews megaplex region- and I had one of those uniquely Louisiana moments.
I took the swamp route through Kraemer-almost hit a startled owl-I'm in Vacherie at the main intersection and then you turn right on the road that connects you to the Mississippi River bridge. As I turn, I see the blinding blue lights of law enforcement and figure I'm headed into a DUI checkpoint. As I get closer-I can't see anything because I'm old AF and smell vaguely of moth balls and moldy cheese-and the cop waves me through. I look on the shoulder and see a damaged vehicle and wonder wtf happened when at that moment I see a 9-10 foot fully mature, squished and mangled alligator dead in the middle of the road. Not a juvenile-but a beastly Alligatoridae from the order Crocodilia-straight out of the Eocene epoch 37 million billion years ago. Damn thing looked like he was wearing a smile like Ed Orgeron at a poolside bikini party.
Which one of you baws ran over an alligator thinking you were going to visit my dearest Clotile after I left?
I took the swamp route through Kraemer-almost hit a startled owl-I'm in Vacherie at the main intersection and then you turn right on the road that connects you to the Mississippi River bridge. As I turn, I see the blinding blue lights of law enforcement and figure I'm headed into a DUI checkpoint. As I get closer-I can't see anything because I'm old AF and smell vaguely of moth balls and moldy cheese-and the cop waves me through. I look on the shoulder and see a damaged vehicle and wonder wtf happened when at that moment I see a 9-10 foot fully mature, squished and mangled alligator dead in the middle of the road. Not a juvenile-but a beastly Alligatoridae from the order Crocodilia-straight out of the Eocene epoch 37 million billion years ago. Damn thing looked like he was wearing a smile like Ed Orgeron at a poolside bikini party.
Which one of you baws ran over an alligator thinking you were going to visit my dearest Clotile after I left?
12
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:19 am to Lsupimp
quote:or Florida
Only In Louisiana...
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:20 am to Lsupimp
Not me, I would’ve flipped my Vespa
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:20 am to Lsupimp
a little early for this many pots isn't it?
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:22 am to Lsupimp
Your HS essay teacher would give you an A for your descriptive abilities.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:23 am to jizzle6609
quote:
my Vespa
Holy crap. Is it...You?
Also. frick Florida. Ain't no 61-year-old cajun bombshell in Florida named Clotile.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:33 am to kciDAtaE
Or Georgia
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:36 am to Lsupimp
I hit a gator trying to cross I-10 when I was on my way to LSU baseball at the Box from Metairie. It happened between LaPlace and Sorrento.
I think I made its head fly off.
I think I made its head fly off.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:40 am to Lsupimp
Why are you old folk on the road after midnight.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:49 am to Lsupimp
If the water's wet, there's gators in there.
It's about to be open season on gators in LA.
Fox 8
Then there's the St. Charles gator that took a bite out of crime.
Gator hunts DUI suspect
It's about to be open season on gators in LA.
quote:
State wildlife officials are preparing to launch a new recreational alligator hunting program as the number of nuisance alligators appears to be growing. The program begins at a time when the state’s alligator population is estimated in the millions.
Nuisance alligators are becoming increasingly common in the region. One interrupted a search for a missing swimmer in Lake Pontchartrain on Sunday. “I thought it was a bull shark,” said veteran rescue diver Mark Michaud. He said officials called off the search after encountering the alligator, estimated at more than 10 feet long. It is not clear whether the alligator caused the swimmer’s death.
Another alligator showed up in a Belle Chasse swimming pool over the weekend.
Fox 8
Then there's the St. Charles gator that took a bite out of crime.
Gator hunts DUI suspect
Posted on 6/11/26 at 9:58 am to Lsupimp
Had one there dead couple weeks ago when I passed thru that way.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:07 am to Lsupimp
quote:
Which one of you baws ran over an alligator thinking you were going to visit my dearest Clotile after I left?
Not me, I need the exercise so I walk there. The gators will leave you alone if you distract them by throwing meat at them. The rougarous though... there have been nights where dear Clotile has had to be bereft of my caring touch.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:13 am to Lsupimp
quote:
Which one of you baws ran over an alligator thinking you were going to visit my dearest Clotile after I left?
And it would have worked, too, if not for you meddling kids and that gator carcass.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:14 am to kciDAtaE
People don’t really travel through the Florida swamps like they travel through the Louisiana swamps.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:15 am to Bard
quote:
there have been nights where dear Clotile has had to be bereft of my caring touch
BARD= National treasure.
Clamdip ain't half bad either.
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:33 am to Lsupimp
quote:
greater Raceland-Matthews megaplex region
Did you pass through the new carwash?
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:50 am to CootKilla
At least gators are close to the ground....I just barely missed hitting an adult black bear at 60mph.....on my Goldwing. Seat still has a permanent crease from the pucker.
And fsck Wisconsin!
And fsck Wisconsin!
Posted on 6/11/26 at 10:54 am to Lsupimp
There are two things that do way more damage to a vehicle than you might expect.
A cow and an alligator.
Friend of mine totaled a new 2006 Duramax coming back from creole one night. The culprit? The alligator which hit the front axle perfectly and bent the frame, tranmssion mounts, transfer case mounts sheered off, and rear end was hit so hard the drive shaft stretched
A cow and an alligator.
Friend of mine totaled a new 2006 Duramax coming back from creole one night. The culprit? The alligator which hit the front axle perfectly and bent the frame, tranmssion mounts, transfer case mounts sheered off, and rear end was hit so hard the drive shaft stretched
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