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Started By
Message
re: Nike Employee That Sold To Heaven’s Gate Cult The Day Before Its Mass Suicide
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:21 am to HenryParsons
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:21 am to HenryParsons
I work in insurance, and have never heard of alien abduction insurance 
That sounds totally made up.
Kidnap and ransom insurance very much exists, so maybe it is a form of that.
There is obviously no way to know if someone was abducted by aliens. Not buying this part of the story.
That sounds totally made up.
Kidnap and ransom insurance very much exists, so maybe it is a form of that.
There is obviously no way to know if someone was abducted by aliens. Not buying this part of the story.
3
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:23 am to cas4t
quote:
I work in insurance, and have never heard of alien abduction insurance
That sounds
like a pretty lucrative business. As long as you get people to buy, you'll never have to pay out.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:25 am to HenryParsons
would wear
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:29 am to MorbidTheClown
quote:
alien abduction insurance
Who was the beneficiary of these policies if they all died?
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:31 am to LazloHollyfeld
quote:
Who was the beneficiary of these policies if they all died?
if they died but, weren't abducted by aliens. seems like no one gets paid. but, i'm no insurance guru.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:33 am to Giantkiller
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:42 am to HenryParsons
This kind of thing would be hard to pull off these days. Back then people just kind of minded their business more.
This post was edited on 7/28/23 at 9:43 am
Posted on 7/28/23 at 9:46 am to HenryParsons
Probably disappointed he didn't charge a little more since it wasn't going to be any repeat business.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:05 am to HenryParsons
If I wore those ‘sneakers’ (I hate that frickin word), I’d probably off myself too
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:20 am to HenryParsons
quote:
the Nike Decade, a running sneaker
The only people running in those didn du nuffin
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:31 am to HenryParsons
The Heaven’s Gate cult still has a website that is managed to this day. I’d say the guy who was chosen to stay back and run the website definitely won the raffle.
LINK
LINK
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:37 am to HenryParsons
quote:
42 alien abduction insurance policies.
Wut?
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:44 am to HenryParsons
quote:
They all went to a restaurant
Weren't there like 900 of them?
ETA: Nope, I was thinking of Jonestown.
This post was edited on 7/28/23 at 11:20 am
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:46 am to HenryParsons
quote:
They all went to a restaurant, don’t remember the name, wore the same clothes, and were very polite. All ordered the exact same meal down to the iced tea and peach cobbler for dessert. The manager of the restaurant even shook their hands as they left because they were such pleasant guests.
Anyone else else curious what kind of tip they left? When I waited tables we always hated working Sundays because the church crowd was notorious for the verbal tip, which is to tell you what a great job you did and then leave 10%.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 10:47 am to HenryParsons
Assault shoes.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 11:09 am to HenryParsons
These people also castrated themselves. Only after a botched castration lead to a death did they start having it done at a hospital.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 11:16 am to cas4t
quote:
Alien abduction insurance is a novelty insurance policy offered exclusively by the Saint Lawrence Agency in Florida since 1987. As its name suggests, it provides financial benefits if you’re abducted by an alien.
quote:
Alien abduction insurance offered by the Saint Lawrence Agency offers $10 million in coverage in the event that you’re abducted from planet Earth by an extraterrestrial (you can go ahead and have a chuckle now). To be clear, the policy is not for real.
quote:
Case in point: The insurance certificate includes coverage for multidimensional joy rides and sarcasm from immediate family members. You can also qualify for double indemnity coverage ($20 million) if any of the following occur: The alien insists on conjugal visits. The encounter results in offspring referred to as the “missing link.” The alien refers to you as a nutritional food source or “the other white meat.” You can provide proof of your abduction and return with a claim form.
quote:
According to an interview in Leader’s Edge with the Saint Lawrence Agency founder Mike St. Lawrence, getting a payout is virtually impossible, as it requires a signature from an onboard alien that participated in the abduction.
quote:
According to St. Lawrence, only two people have managed to file a claim successfully via exceptions. In the first instance, a cab driver from New York had been telling friends about his abduction his whole life and called the insurance agency to share the story. In the second instance, a train conductor from New York had sent an overexposed Polaroid picture with his claim, saying that the lighting in the UFO was bad. In both instances, the agency stuck to its payout terms, which is $1 per year for 10 million years.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 11:32 am to HenryParsons
quote:
Should I have known? Should I have said something or asked more questions?
Yes. No one asking “do these shoes make me fast?” and having a trial sprint should be cause for alarm.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 11:36 am to Funky Tide 8
quote:
Back then people just kind of minded their business more.
Now they just take out their phones and video everything.
Posted on 7/28/23 at 11:41 am to HenryParsons
The Heave’s Gate cult and mass suicide just reinforces how utterly fricking stupid and gullible people in this country are.
Can you imagine being conned into believing that shite and offing yourself by this lunatic.
Can you imagine being conned into believing that shite and offing yourself by this lunatic.
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