re: I see a lot of yall complain about women around here.

Most of them aren’t gay. Just divorced and mad as hell about it

Most of us love women but hate what modern women have become. Most women nowadays have adopted insane standards that even they couldn't meet.

As I talked about in the other thread, back in the 1970s, 1980s, 1990s, even early 2000s, if you were a guy who mildly had your shite together, you could get a woman. Nowadays, you'll just get laughed at and possibly on a viral TikTok or YouTube video calling you a creep just for asking a woman out in person. I still don't think many men (or women) who are 50 and over genuinely understand how much online dating and #MeToo changed that.

#MeToo made online dating the default. If you try to ask a woman out in person, you are flat out risking a harassment charge or to be a part of the next viral TikTok or YouTube video. Sure a woman could say yes, if you're in the upper 20%, but it's a much bigger risk than it was even 15 years ago.

Online dating has made it where 3, 4, 5 women absolutely expect to land an 8, 9 or 10 guy (preferably 9 or 10). Before online dating, people genuinely dated in their range attractiveness wise, online dating completely screwed that up.

Take me for example. Yes it's a hard topic for me. I'm 42, 5'7", in relatively good shape but only make around $75,000/year (I've started doing some door dash a few hours a week, nothing major, planning to get that up to $80,000/year). I own a 14 year old car that is fully paid off, I have no credit card debt, I have a 3 bedroom 2 bathroom townhome worth around $400,000 and besides that have around $150,000 in wealth between my checking account, CD accounts, investment account, Roth 401(k) and Roth IRA. I'm lower middle class but I live a decently good life and I feel I have a good personality.

But because I'm not 6 feet, because I don't make at least $150,000/year and because I don't look like a male model or a movie star, I am invisible to almost all women.

I think the point is there has to be some middle ground. Yes I'm lower middle class, but I'm not unemployed and still living with my parents. I'm completely in the middle looks wise, 5, maybe a 6 clean and dressed up. I'm not expecting to date some woman supermodel. I just want a woman who is kind, wants to be in a relationship (a true relationship where we support each other, not a modern relationship where the man and woman are competing with each other), no kids, has a good personality and is at least somewhat in shape. I don't even care if she is average or a little overweight, just not obese. And I feel like many guys in my position have similar realistic expectations.

Yet what are we offered? Women who are 100 lbs or more overweight. Women who expect a Man to bring a $150,000/year income into the relationship, while she works Part Time at Starbucks and has $25,000 in student loan debt. Women who have been divorced and have kids from multiple other Men, expecting the Man to clean up her mess.

Most of us Men who are in the lower 80%, we don't hate Women. We're just tired of their unrealistic standards. We're tired of the insane double standards. We're tired of being judged by our height and income, meanwhile Women expect Men to "accept her for who she is". We're tired of Women who are at our level not even giving us the time of day, leaving only Women who are broken in some way or have a lot of issues, expecting a Man to fix those issues. We're tired of those Women at our level, who are not better than us in any way, treating us like we're beneath them.

I don't hate Women. But I am incredibly frustrated at this point by most Women. Being 42 I feel like I'm in a no mans land of sorts. I don't know if I should just try to date my age (40 and up) or if I should go crazy younger (21 - 28). The 29 - 39 group of Women just seem hopeless at this point. And a lot of Men are feeling the same way.

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TheMagicMan

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Gotdam son. You need a wingman, stat

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Just come out of the closet already. It worked for me.

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Learning to love the feel of a penis in my butt was so liberating

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Just come out of the closet already.

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we aren't complaining that they don't have penises.

Glad you're happy. I have an interracial, inter generational partner half my age with no kids involved and we couldn't be happier. The heart wants what the heart wants.

Just my friendly advice as someone who’s 53 and navigating the dating
You are way too much up in your own head. $75k is decent scratch. I guarantee the guy that makes 50k thinks you have it made and the guy making 150 bemoans how easy the guys at 250 have it. 5’7” is tough but just fricking own it. Tons of dudes hitting outside their weight class
I could give you a laundry list of things that make me second guess myself
My advice - find a group - ideally a singles group but whatever - for something you’re good at or enjoy. A run club, a pool players group, a book club, volunteering for something. You’ll meet chicks for sure
Keep your chin up

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You are way too much up in your own head. $75k is decent scratch. I guarantee the guy that makes 50k thinks you have it made and the guy making 150 bemoans how easy the guys at 250 have it.

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The rich are always those making $5k a year more than you. The envy is ridiculous. Have confidence, and lead (not push around the woman, but lead) and you will 100% pull outside your "class."

Go to a QT (or the equivalent outside of TX), Home Depot, etc. and if OP sees a woman, "Hi ma'am, need help?")