re: Have your parents ever caught you doing anything sexual?

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I still remember like yesterday when she almost kicked my bedroom door off the hinges, held the statement in my face and screamed "Chlamydia!!!!".

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northshorebamaman

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Checks out.

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The very first time I had sex I caught chlamydia

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Da frick

Many of these have been fantastic. A couple spring to mind.

First, my girlfriend who was sixteen (I was fifteen) was dropping me off at home at about 10:30ish, and decided to give me blowie on the street in front of my house. We figured that my parents would have been long asleep, or at least watching TV, so it would be safe. Well, low and behold, I see some headlights approaching and I tell my girlfriend to keep her head down. Turns out it was my parents who were out of coffee and decided to pick some up. I walked in a few minutes later, and my dad said “I saw you in the car, but where was ________?” I made up some BS about her picking something up off the ground. We never discussed again.

Second, for some god unknown reason, and it being a cool night, a different girlfriend and I decided to go at it outside on a blanket, instead of risking it in the house or car. Well, being an idiot, I deposited my used condoms in a shrub in my neighbors’ yard. Mom got a call from the neighbor the next day (Baptist snitch). I had to walk out as a 16 year old and pick up my used condoms with my mom and neighbor watching. I was absolutely horrified and disgusted.

Yep. Cops rolled up while I was banging a girlfriend in the back seat. I had to get out of my car with noting on but silk boxers and my cock still partially hard. Four cops on the scene and they were all laughing

Girl friend and I went to the store while her parents were cooking one night .Parked at the family’s barn for a quickie. Walked in the house , parents and everyone looked at us like we were zombies. She started her period and I had blood up to my elbows and on my shirt. She had on white shorts covered in blood . We both turned around and walked out .

Ok. You win this thread

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Buddy and me snuck some girls back to his parents house. Sneak in through a window we unlocked because it was quieter than a mouse fart. Told me to take mine to the living room while he takes his to the bedroom. Family computer is in the living room... And his dad was butt naked, leaning back in the chair, and going to town with headphones on. Guy couldn't get his tightey whitey's on fast enough. He started screaming at me, the girl, ran to my friend's room and screamed at him. Next thing you know, the mom wakes up and there is an argument going on of us sneaking girls in vs well dad's watching porn cheating on you mom. Dad forgot to delete the video of the two chicks licking it up on his AOL page since he was to busy putting his underwear back on. Me and the girls snuck out during the yelling. Still is my best friend and see his mom and dad often

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Gold.

When I was 17 I had a g/f who’s sex drive was insane which was fantastic. Her parents weren’t home, but her little brother was in his room while were in the living room watching tv. I had athletic shorts on and she was laying with her head in my lap and starts giving me a bj. Shortly after her brother walks in and she covers my junk with her hands/head and acts like she’s sleeping. Brother walks over to the recliner, sits down, and starts watching tv and talking. Must have been at least 30 minutes before he left the room. I quickly put it up and we went take a ride so she could finish what she started earlier without interruption.

Me and girl I used to mess around with ride to a party with my buddy and his GF. Girl I was with wasn’t ugly, but wasn’t real pretty either. She did have an awesome body and knew a dick wasn’t square. We walk to truck to grab a beer and she wants to hop in the back seat for a round. We had been going at it for little while and I was just getting in the Short Rows when I hear the door behind me open and my buddy just says “Got Dam!” And slam the door. Know his truck probably had a 3 in lift and he was a shorter fella, so when I go talk to him, he says “ you could have at least locked the door, when I opened it all I saw were balls slapping and a hairy arse!!!” I still pick with him about it today and he gets mad!

When I was a teen I was finger banging my gf on the swing out in her yard one night. Her grandmother caught us. She ran me off and called my mom.

Another time I took a different girlfriend home and we parked under her carport. We started going at it. Looked up and her mom is in the kitchen watching us through the window.

Was get a blowup from another girlfriend one night in the Braves parking lot. Place was vacant. She's going to town and I'm sitting back enjoying it. Got a knock on the window. Two cops are outside my car. Rolled the window down and cops ask us if we are ok. Well, we were before yall rolled up.