re: Funny/Stupid Things You Thought As a Kid...

When I was a kid I thought Mt Rushmore somehow was a natural formation. I thought it was the most amazing coincidence ever. Because really, how in the world could anyone actually carve out a mountain to look like four president's heads? I could not conceive of any humanly way to create it.

I just assumed everyone knew it was one of the wonders of the world until one day in middle school I was flipping through tv channels and stumbled upon a "creating Mt Rushmore" documentary. My mind was blown.

I was 6 years old and never been out of the back woods of Vernon Parish when my brother first went to LSU and he invited us all down for a game against North Carolina (the one with Choo Choo Justice)

When I got my first glimpse of Tiger stadium he told me that was where the game would be.

I remember being worried about what would happen if a player fell off the top - assumed they played on the roof.

The only football game I'd ever seen was at the old Gilbert Field in Leesville,
where the bleachers were just wooden seats along side a vacant piece of ground.

My brother and his friend showed me around campus and took me to see Mike the Tiger (the first one - and I have seen them all)

Mike's cage was nothing more than a concrete pad with chain link fencing around it with a small brick building used for shelter. They had just washed out Mikes cage with a water hose and the slimy crap was all across the sidewalk we were on. maybe 4-6 feet wide.

Those two just hopped right over it and when I tried I landed about 2/3 the way across and got Tiger shite all over my clothes. Mom and dad had to take me downtown to buy new clothes.

ahhhhh - those were the days - and I may be the only person you've ever known that has had Mike #I tiger shite on his back.

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If you jumped off a roof with a bed sheet over your head, it would act as a parachute and you'd not get hurt..................WRONG

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yep = discovered that myself when I was about 9 yrs old. But I did OK when just jumping off the edge of the roof

So I went to the crown and jumped off again - landed and was unable to move for almost half an hour - slowly got ok and never tried that again.

But when I landed, I felt a very strange tingle in the small of my back - and for decades afterward sometimes when something jarred my back I would get that same tingle. Happened a lot when I was playing football.

About 20 years ago, I during my cancer treatments, I was getting lots of x-rays and CT scans etc. - one day a doctor asked me why I'd never said anything about my "broken back" - seems like I had compression fractures in 3 vertebra in the small of my back. Had to tell him how/when it had happened.

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#2: That cowboy hats were actually TV antennas for special channels that were being hid from the rest of us.

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I have questions.

Not that you are any dumber than most 5 year olds. We were all little idiots.

But what chain of logic made you arrive at this conclusion.

I can understand most conclusions in this thread. This one...

This one is going to give me an aneurysm.

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firstly, I never claimed to be smarter than your average 5 yr. old. Now that we've dispensed with that...

Have no idea how old you are but this is back in the day with the huge expanded metal satellite dishes with scrambled channels (and very enjoyable raw feed during commercial breaks). We were too poor to have such. But everybody I knew that was well off had them.

Somehow, not sure how, I made the connection that people who wore cowboy hats (oil boom mainly) also had satellite dishes. And these cowboy hats were part of that system. I could think of no other reason to wear such, in my young mind, a silly hat.

I thought the Perry Mason show was the news. That was my bedtime so I never got to see more than the opening which featured dramatic music and men in suits behind desks.

We used to drive past a bar which featured a sign that said "No Cover." I thought that meant they had dancing girls with no clothes.

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#2: That cowboy hats were actually TV antennas for special channels that were being hid from the rest of us.

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OK, cowboy hats and satellite dishes. That's the tie in that was missing. When I think TV antenna, I'm thinking one of those metal cross-stick looking things - nothing like a cowboy hat.

I thought girls didn’t shite until I was 47.

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I told my friends prudish mom that I wanted to be a prostitute growing up because I didn't know what it meant, but thought it sounded intellectual.

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Well, to be fair, if you break down the etymology of the word....

I remember once seeing Bunny Rabbit from Captain Kangaroo drawing on whatever they had for a white board at the time and throwing a violent crying fit thinking he was going to get in trouble for writing on the wall. He kept going and going with it.

I had just had that happen to me.

not humorous but it terrified me because I still remember it