re: Funny/Stupid Things You Thought As a Kid...

As a young kid, I thought that all the pineapple in the world was grown in Hawaii....and I thought for a long time that every sink in Hawaii had three faucets...hot water faucet, cold water faucet, and a third faucet for pineapple juice.

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ETA: From what I saw on TV, I didn't think color was invented until the early 60s.

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Yeah. I remember having eye surgery as a kid and the hospital had color TVs.

So naturally I thought the surgery gave me the ability to see TV in color.

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Misheard lyrics for me when I was younger were: "Dirty jeans and the thunder-jeep!" (Dirty deeds done dirt cheap)

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I seriously thought they were singing about “thirty thieves and the thunder chief”

I thought someone being raped was actually "raked". And it involved dragging a leaf rake across someone's face.

I thought the trees moving was what made the wind blow.

I thought waves in the gulf were from ship wakes

I watched a lot of Westerns as a kid which instilled a legit fear of Indians in me. I grew up in Avoyelles Parish and I actually thought there were Indians living in the woods by Winn Dixie when in reality it was just the Tunica Biloxi Tribe people using the woods as a shortcut to the store because their grounds was just on the other side. I was terrified waiting in the car while my mom went inside to shop, thinking I was gonna get dragged into the woods and scalped. My grandfather convinced me there was a kid named Isaac living in his truck tool box and I believed him. I also thought Metallica had a song called "Sad Patrol" (Sad but True). I'm sure there's more but those are some that stand out.

In that same vein, I thought the singer of "Break My Stride" was female for years and years.

Also thought "No One Knows" by Queens Of The Stone Age was sung by Chris Cornell until like a year ago.

I thought there were actually people inside the TV and radio. My older sister told me there were and why would she lie?

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Do Not Pass and Pass With Care signs gave me anxiety as a kid. I thought they meant we couldn’t drive past the signs or something bad would happen.

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I was certain that one these days my dad was going to be arrested for driving down a road with a "No Trucks Allowed" sign in our Ford Ranger

At 4 I figured that since I hadn't met any girls who had told me they loved me besides my sister that I was going to end up marrying her. I guess most people in Alabama never grow out of that thinking.