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re: Does your non-married significant other split living expenses 50/50 with you?
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:35 pm to dcrews
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:35 pm to dcrews
Me and my SO split costs 50/50 when we lived together and we were both making the same. We are not living together and I make double as before now. I have taken more responsibility for the bills but she still pays a portion. went from 50/50 to more like 30/70.
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Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:35 pm to hubertcumberdale
quote:
s she not expected to contribute financially to the relationship/marriage?
That’s up to each couple. But finances aren’t everything. If the woman contributes to a relationship in other ways then finances can be waived. Like if I found the right woman? I wouldn’t expect more than 10% financial contributio towards total cost and maybe even find ways to eliminate the cost completely
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:36 pm to dcrews
quote:
Who is the irrational individual in this scenario?
I wouldn't split the mortgage 50/50, as technically if things don't work out I get a benefit. I'd also have to know income. I'd probably say 70/30 is the most I would go if we made the same amount, or I would find good not elite studio apartment prices in the area and go with that.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:38 pm to dcrews
So she gets to live in a house, pay less than what her rent used to be per month to stay there, and people think that HE is trying to screw HER over? She is absolutely taking advantage of him. Helping with the mortgage shouldn't be seen by her as paying for a house but with none of the benefits. She should just see it as a form of rent while she gets to stay with her significant other in a nicer, larger spot than her old apartment.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:38 pm to Shiftyplus1
quote:
people think that HE is trying to screw HER over
You need to google search “equity”
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:39 pm to dcrews
They either need to get married or break it off now.
Dude has commitment, control issues. She want to be married and isn’t happy. It’ll never work.
Dude has commitment, control issues. She want to be married and isn’t happy. It’ll never work.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:39 pm to Shiftyplus1
quote:
So she gets to live in a house, pay less than what her rent used to be per month to stay there, and people think that HE is trying to screw HER over? She is absolutely taking advantage of him. Helping with the mortgage shouldn't be seen by her as paying for a house but with none of the benefits. She should just see it as a form of rent while she gets to stay with her significant other in a nicer, larger spot than her old apartment.
yeah i dont understand how anyone else would see this any differently. shes going to be paying someone something in order to live somewhere
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:40 pm to fallguy_1978
We have a joint account but I don’t monitor it really or I didn’t. I recently found out “we” spent $8k at fricking Target this year when I added it all up
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:40 pm to makinskrilla
quote:
You need to google search “equity”
do you understand when you rent from a landlord you are paying their mortgage?
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:40 pm to Jcorye1
quote:
I wouldn't split the mortgage 50/50, as technically if things don't work out I get a benefit
Sure, I don't disagree, but she gets a benefit as well in the amount of money she can save by not having to rent by herself.
Living by herself, she likely pays twice as much to a complete stranger and gets no benefit anyway.
If they both lived in an apartment and there was no equity to be had, does that change the 50/50 ask? If so, why? Sounds like the guy benefitting is the only sticking point
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:42 pm to hubertcumberdale
I probably wouldn't ask her to pay half, but she should be paying something. I'd make it where it was a good bit less than her rent would otherwise be.
My mortgage is less, her housing costs are less. It's a win/win situation unless she's going to act stupid about it.
My mortgage is less, her housing costs are less. It's a win/win situation unless she's going to act stupid about it.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:43 pm to dcrews
if they were married/community property, the house was his prior to marriage, and they divorce, she could recover 1/2 of the principal paid during the marriage. interest/tax/insurance are just living expenses that they share.
also, compare 1/2 total mortgage payment to her previous rent.
also, compare 1/2 total mortgage payment to her previous rent.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:45 pm to dcrews
I’d just call it rent. She’s not living for free
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:45 pm to dcrews
quote:
If they both lived in an apartment and there was no equity to be had, does that change the 50/50 ask? If so, why? Sounds like the guy benefitting is the only sticking point
Depends on how much everyone is making, but apartment, assuming everyone is making the same amount or reasonably close, I'd be for 50/50.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:46 pm to dcrews
No, I pay for pretty much everything except for whatever random shite she buys on the internet.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:46 pm to dcrews
She could gain equity if she married him, but clearly she has no intentions of that.
She should pay like she would pay in rent. The whole point of her moving in is to "be together".
She should pay like she would pay in rent. The whole point of her moving in is to "be together".
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:47 pm to Jcorye1
quote:
Depends on how much everyone is making, but apartment, assuming everyone is making the same amount or reasonably close, I'd be for 50/50.
They didn't mention in the video either of the individuals financial situations, so I'm assuming they make around the same for the sake of the conversation.
In any case, unless she lives in the slums, half the cost of living with her bf wouldn't be anywhere close to the same as her current monthly living expenses.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:51 pm to dcrews
He should just charge her “rent” to cover it.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:52 pm to Hermit Crab
quote:
I think the woman is mostly right, but she shouldn't be paid back 100% of her contributions if they break up, some of that is going towards interest payments and not equity, and if she got back all of it she would essentially be getting to live for free for however long they date. Not sure how I would want to calculate that though.
She shouldn't look at moving in as a free ride either though. Correct, she isn't gaining equity, but she wasn't either when she was renting.
I think they are probably going to be doomed if fighting about money this early. Him pushing for 50/50 out the box is ridiculous, but she also should be willing to pay for utilities, cable groceries, dinners out, contribute a bit more on vacations given no rent is being paid.
Posted on 12/4/23 at 1:53 pm to dcrews
Let her pay 50% of what she pays now. Living together in his house will thus help her financially. It will help him too, because he'll start getting these contributions from her. They both win.
She's taking the big risk here, moving into a house he owns and has control over. He could kick her out, etc. Ultimately, living together, being together every night, etc., will make or break this couple.
She's taking the big risk here, moving into a house he owns and has control over. He could kick her out, etc. Ultimately, living together, being together every night, etc., will make or break this couple.
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