Dear Facebook: New Orleans really is the most wonderful batshit insane city on the planet

A stroll along Calhoun, Audubon Park to my left. A family pushes a stroller along the walking path as a city streetcar moves swiftly by. A homeless man with few teeth holds a sign begging for help. A college-aged girl in a sports bra jogs towards Walnut Street Playground. And a homeless woman holds up an arm with a missing hand to passing cars.

A walk up Magazine (I originally put Magnolia ). Fresh baguette from La Boulangerie in hand. Perhaps a dip into a local art shop for some local New Orleans work. A woman with practically one dread lock wearing a red dress, her entire arse hanging out, pushes a cart down the sidewalk. I pass Ms. Mae's. It is 10am on a Saturday. A man sits with his head down at the bar, looks up at me. He is drunk as a skunk this early in the morning. An advertisement for a champagne and shop night.

A ride to the Quarter. A woman rocking back and forth on the ground babbling about nothing. From the Quarter to the Garden District. My wheels nearly fall off the axle from the busted roads. A bright purple and blue house. Three Instagram-looking girls with iced coffees walking and laughing. A pirate-looking man with a bagged beverage hobbles past them.

I love New Orleans. Every time I visit - every single time - I wish I could move back. There's not another city on the planet with as much character, art, food, and expression as New Orleans. It's one of the only American cities with a distinct cultural identity and persona.

But good lord I cannot imagine living amongst all of the riff raff and city issues. Car insurance is more than double Alabama. You're 100% going to deal with a hurricane. The city is in a constant state of repair. Crime is spread across the city with little reprieve from the threat of being a victim.

It's not boring though. Here in the Over the Mountain area of Alabama, I am bored. It's safe, quiet, and unseasoned. Slow. Easy. Bland. Suburban neighborhoods and strip malls. Relaxed.

That's the real trade off, isn't it? A life that feeds your soul or a life that guards your peace.