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Started By
Message
Telling your child good things about their other parent
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:08 am
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:08 am
My dad used to make little comments/stories about my mom, from the time I was a kid through adulthood. Little positive things like how well she cared for me as an infant when I got very sick or how well she was learning a new sport in her 50s. Of course, means a little more in a 1-on-1 conversation outside of her presence.
I’ve recently tried to do the same with my kids when something comes to mind. I realize in today’s world that there are more challenges with hectic lives or negative thoughts toward spouse/ex-spouse/baby mama.
May be easier said than done in some cases but main point is that I believe it’s good for kids to hear positive stories about their parents. My dad passed away a decade ago but I can still remember several stories he told me of my mom. They always made me proud to have her as a parent and shaped my personality in good ways.
I’ve recently tried to do the same with my kids when something comes to mind. I realize in today’s world that there are more challenges with hectic lives or negative thoughts toward spouse/ex-spouse/baby mama.
May be easier said than done in some cases but main point is that I believe it’s good for kids to hear positive stories about their parents. My dad passed away a decade ago but I can still remember several stories he told me of my mom. They always made me proud to have her as a parent and shaped my personality in good ways.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:09 am to litenin
Most posters here tell their kids how slutty their ex wife is on their weekend
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:09 am to litenin
I can tell you some good things about your Mom too…
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:12 am to litenin
Always. Except when we talking about the fricking car seats and her refusal to loosen the straps before extracting the kids.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:13 am to litenin
I don't have kids, but I tell my friend's kids that their Dad got ahead in life by stealing candy bars from the gas station.
I'm joking, but those little fackers remember everything. Their brains are like a hard drive that can't be wiped clean.
I'm joking, but those little fackers remember everything. Their brains are like a hard drive that can't be wiped clean.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:13 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
Most posters here tell their kids how slutty their ex wife is on their weekend
I tried not to talk about how their mom was a cheating whore who married the guy she was cheating on me with. My kids figured out that the divorce timeline didn't add up around age 11.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:14 am to The Third Leg
quote:
refusal to loosen the straps before extracting the kids
ok so my wife isn't the only savage....good to know
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:15 am to litenin
My daughter is 9, and her mother and I have co-parented her entire life. We were never married and I’m glad we didn’t, but I never miss an opportunity to tell my kid how good a job her mom does at various things. It definitely goes a long ways towards confidence and a sense of worth she feels towards her mom. Positive reinforcement is always a good thing.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:18 am to Honest Tune
quote:Stop.
My daughter is 9, and her mother and I have co-parented her entire life.
Just
stop
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:19 am to litenin
Not married/no kids, but I definitely know hearing my parents appreciate one another (especially outside of each others' presence) influenced my behavior with and expectations of partners.
I can imagine hearing constant backstabbing/snippy remarks about the other parent probably has similarly opposite effects on kids' future relationships.
I can imagine hearing constant backstabbing/snippy remarks about the other parent probably has similarly opposite effects on kids' future relationships.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:23 am to litenin
Nice little tip. I think It’s probably important to hear that from your parents.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:25 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
Most posters here tell their kids how slutty their ex wife is on their weekend
A lot do, no disputing that. I didn't with mine. Serves no purpose and is quite immature/stupid.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:25 am to litenin
quote:
My dad used to make little comments/stories about my mom, from the time I was a kid through adulthood. Little positive things like how well she cared for me as an infant when I got very sick or how well she was learning a new sport in her 50s. Of course, means a little more in a 1-on-1 conversation outside of her presence.
Yeah, I do this with my sons. Truth is, I actually LIKE my wife and always have. I have just made a point of letting them know it and pointing out things she does that make me like her.
I have no clue if she does the same...
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:33 am to Slagathor
quote:
I can imagine hearing constant backstabbing/snippy remarks about the other parent probably has similarly opposite effects on kids' future relationships
It absolutely does. I still take up for my ex when my son says something about her actions. I never say anything negative about her even though she does the opposite. I hope one day he will realize what's going on.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:34 am to SammyTiger
quote:
Nice little tip.
That's what she said.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:39 am to litenin
I’ve always avoided bad mouthing my ex but speaking well of him is a lot harder. Sometimes with computer stuff, I’ll say “you should call your dad on that, I bet he’d know how to fix it”.
Lately though they’re realizing just how badly he’s let them down their whole life and they’re gravitating towards my husband more. He’s done a good job at balancing their need for a stable father figure with reminding them that he can’t take bio dad’s place.
Lately though they’re realizing just how badly he’s let them down their whole life and they’re gravitating towards my husband more. He’s done a good job at balancing their need for a stable father figure with reminding them that he can’t take bio dad’s place.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:43 am to dkreller
+1. Drives me crazy, and it is every. Single. Time.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:45 am to litenin
Father of 2 here, I will never, ever under any circumstance throw my wife under the bus when speaking to my boys. I will always build her up. When she falters, just as I do, I build her up and humanize her in a way they can understand. That's what good, responsible adults do.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:58 am to BeerThirty
What’s even more frustrating is that when the kids were infants she always thought it was necessary to remind me to loosen the straps every single time I would put the kids in and out. I guess at a certain age she just didn’t give a shite anymore.
Posted on 6/4/21 at 11:58 am to litenin
Jaydn and Breighdan already know that Cheryl is an unstable bitch.
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