- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
re: For folks with 2+ kids, what made you stop at 2 or go for a 3rd one?
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:03 am to rickgrimes
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:03 am to rickgrimes
From the beginning, my wife and I talked about having two children. God granted our wish, and we had daughters in '87 and '89. Perhaps this is selfish, but I knew that with 2, I/we could be okay financially and still be able to live the lifestyle we wanted (good house, new-ish cars, annual vacations, etc.) In addition to the financial considerations, there was also our personalities and temperament. Again, we felt like we could manage two okay, but 3 would be a strain.
Then when our daughters reached the ages of roughly 12 and 10, I decided that even if some accident took both daughters from us, I knew I didn't want to start again with more kids. I was far enough removed from the baby/toddler experience that I was unwilling to go back. My wife agreed, so I got fixed in approximately '99 or 2000, as both the procedure and recovery were far easier for me than for my wife.
That's what worked for us, but each couple/family has to reach their own decision(s).
Then when our daughters reached the ages of roughly 12 and 10, I decided that even if some accident took both daughters from us, I knew I didn't want to start again with more kids. I was far enough removed from the baby/toddler experience that I was unwilling to go back. My wife agreed, so I got fixed in approximately '99 or 2000, as both the procedure and recovery were far easier for me than for my wife.
That's what worked for us, but each couple/family has to reach their own decision(s).
0
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:05 am to WG_Dawg
quote:
My wife and I just had our first and he is 2 months old, after these last 2 months I can't imagine wanting to have another.
you'll change your mind
It gets better and you'll forget about those first few months
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:12 am to rickgrimes
There is a 9.5 year gap in our kids...not intentional. Just as we were about to start trying for #2 when #1 was 2 y/o, my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 29. After chemo, surgery, chemo, more surgery and heeding the doctor's advice to wait for a period of time we tried again. He is our rainbow baby. We decided not to push our luck and quit at two.
My wife said she had been through enough hospitals and surgeries and that it was my turn, so I gladly went in for the snip.
My wife said she had been through enough hospitals and surgeries and that it was my turn, so I gladly went in for the snip.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:22 am to FelicianaTigerfan
quote:What a piece of shite you are.
I married a whore that had one
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:25 am to tigergirl10
I wanted 2 she wanted 3, and after my son was born the next pregnancy was twins....... so if you had twins you understand why we are done.
This post was edited on 3/2/21 at 10:27 am
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:25 am to rickgrimes
Tired of a fat wife
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:45 am to WG_Dawg
quote:
My wife and I just had our first and he is 2 months old, after these last 2 months I can't imagine wanting to have another. Granted I'm an only child so the "they have to have a sibling!" argument that my wife likes to use doesn't really matter to me.
We were I somewhat a similar situation. I was an only child, but my wife had a sibling. Once we had our second I realized exactly what I had missed in life not having a sibling. The two boys are inseparable and now we wonder if a girl would make it even better.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:46 am to rickgrimes
We had twins and that was it.... 
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:49 am to yellowfin
quote:
We stopped after 2 because we had a boy & girl. If not for that we’d have had another one
Yep, same here. My wife looks at her friends who have girls and thinks having a girl would complete the family. She 100% would go for the 3rd of someone somehow could guarantee that it will be a girl
Posted on 3/2/21 at 10:50 am to rickgrimes
quote:
For folks that decided to stay with 2 or go for a 3rd one, what was your decision making process?
we had issue with both pregnancies.
1st child spend 10 days in Nicu when he was born (leaving hospital without your first born is one of toughest things i've ever done). Everything was fine after that, but was very stressful while happening.
2nd child we had lots of different complications during pregnancy. When he came out healthy, we decided not to push our luck any farther.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:03 am to GatorReb
quote:
Identical to us. We have two boys 3 and 5. Youngest just turned three and with it is potty trained. Done with diapers, bed time has finally gotten better. My wife and i are 33 and 31. We wanted a third. But weve had back to back miscarriages (at like 6 weeks) so thats kind of changed plans a little. (that was last fall) now im starting to wonder if we should try for three or not.
This was almost exactly us, down to the number of miscarriages, a few years ago. We ended up having a girl for our third and she's been worth every sleepless night. I love my boys with all my heart, but hot damn does this little girl have daddy wrapped around her finger.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:08 am to cthomp31
quote:
Zone defense is easier than man to man.
This is a true story.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:11 am to Wermanium
quote:
damn does this little girl have daddy wrapped around her finger.
I actually have a picture of my daughter holding my little finger in the NICU just after she was born while her mom was still recovering.
Still has my heart.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:14 am to rickgrimes
We were cool with man to man and didn’t want to switch to zone defense.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:23 am to wizard1183
Cost, availability of time, and careers
We stopped at 3
Daycare here is $1000/mo per kid minimum for a place you can trust. My wife quit her job for several years as opposed to paying over $36k for daycare.
By the time we would have had kid #4, our oldest was 8. Activities like scouts, sports, friends...all take time. It’s hard to keep dividing up time and feel great about it.
By the time we would have had #4, I was a director level and traveling constantly. Time wasn’t a commodity I had to spare.
About this point, I started worrying more about paying for 3 cars and insurance, college costs, etc... and a 4th kid felt like a huge burden.
That being said, we now say we wished we had gone for a 4th... to even things out! 4 would be my max. I guess we still could, but the wife just turned 40, not sure we are up for it.
A friend of mine has 7 kids. She is an amazing mother, and doesn’t work. Her husband has a good job, but her dad was very wealthy... a nice benefit to have. One thing I notice is how the older kids are expected to be parents, too. I know it works for some, but it doesn’t seem fair to me. My mom was one of 9, and I have heard stories from her about having to take care of siblings, and it wasn’t a positive.
Bottom line, have as many kids as you can afford dollar wise and time wise. Don’t have too many kids if you can’t spare either of those things.
We stopped at 3
Daycare here is $1000/mo per kid minimum for a place you can trust. My wife quit her job for several years as opposed to paying over $36k for daycare.
By the time we would have had kid #4, our oldest was 8. Activities like scouts, sports, friends...all take time. It’s hard to keep dividing up time and feel great about it.
By the time we would have had #4, I was a director level and traveling constantly. Time wasn’t a commodity I had to spare.
About this point, I started worrying more about paying for 3 cars and insurance, college costs, etc... and a 4th kid felt like a huge burden.
That being said, we now say we wished we had gone for a 4th... to even things out! 4 would be my max. I guess we still could, but the wife just turned 40, not sure we are up for it.
A friend of mine has 7 kids. She is an amazing mother, and doesn’t work. Her husband has a good job, but her dad was very wealthy... a nice benefit to have. One thing I notice is how the older kids are expected to be parents, too. I know it works for some, but it doesn’t seem fair to me. My mom was one of 9, and I have heard stories from her about having to take care of siblings, and it wasn’t a positive.
Bottom line, have as many kids as you can afford dollar wise and time wise. Don’t have too many kids if you can’t spare either of those things.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:24 am to rickgrimes
just had 3 - would like to have more but my wife and I are getting older and the delivery is pretty hard on her so probably stopping here
If would have gotten married and had kids younger would want to have 4-5
If would have gotten married and had kids younger would want to have 4-5
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:29 am to rickgrimes
depends...
Can your parents afford for you to have a 3rd kid?
Can your parents afford for you to have a 3rd kid?
Posted on 3/2/21 at 11:40 am to bagboy333
If I knew it was definitely going to be a girl, I’d consider having a third. But my second boy becoming a middle child and the thought of 40-50k tuition per year keeps us from actively trying. Plus I like the idea of being able to retire a decent age and having the ability to travel etc.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 12:05 pm to wizard1183
quote:
Money is the leading factor. Do I want a zoo and raise them in the poor house? Or do I want to have a quality and comfortable life and still pass something on?
This is so true. I find it ironic that this has no bearing on the super rich or super poor, but everyone else in between.
Posted on 3/2/21 at 12:07 pm to rickgrimes
3rd was a whoops. We were about 60/40 no vs yes on a third but obviously glad it happened now. Little baw is the funniest of the bunch.
Page 5 of 6
Popular
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News