Corporate Buzzwords BS email

How many of you deal with this crap on a daily basis???

We need to create some synergies so that we can align and sync up to have a value add to our calls. Maybe even have a deep dive and come up with a game plan so that we become laser focused while picking up the low hanging fruit and drive results. It will require all hands on deck as long as we loop in everyone and assign action items and think outside the box about our pain points so that we don’t have to reinvent the wheel.

We are in the driver’s seat and I think that we can help move the needle and bring some more things to the table as long as we have some things in the pipeline and don’t have to run anything up the ladder. Our window of opportunity is closing so hopefully we won’t have to go back to the drawing board. Otherwise, if none of this can get done in a timely manner with all the moving parts someone will have to jump ship or else they will get off the bus if they haven’t already been thrown under the bus to begin with.

If for some reason we cannot accomplish our tasks we have some options in our back pocket that we can circle back on so that we don’t have a hard stop or disruption to our business or boundary partners. We have to work closely with our physical boots on the ground partners and ensure we are in lockstep with them. Again, if we cannot come to an agreement we will likely have to take the discussion offline and be crystal clear with our messaging. I just really want to make sure that this is on everyone’s radar, and although it is a paradigm shift, it is up to us to move the needle. I hope this is clear to everyone and that you can utilize the toolkits and navigate the very unique situations that we encounter. This could be a game changer! Ping me if you have any questions.

Regards, Thanks, Thank You, Sincerely, Yours Truly.

How was that for a long email without actually saying anything?