re: What are the top 5 signs that your dog is dumb?

if they dont piss/shite/vomit on your floors they are smart enough for me

They literally bite the hand that feeds them.

My boxer is so stupid that she will scratch to come inside, then once the door is opened you have to invite her in. Otherwise she will just stand there. So you stfu

Well that's just perfect, apparently my dachshund is dumb too.

I have a dumb dog, so here it goes
1. Kids feed him rocks.... he eats them
2. When it's storming every other dog I've had hides in their house. He runs around in thunder storms like it's Christmas.
3. Every dog marks territory on walks, but this dude marks every 5 feet. If you walk him around the one city block, you turn corner one and he lifts his leg but is out of pee. Regardless this continues, and he just acts like he is marking stuff.
4. Don't get me started about invisible fence. I had to buy the 48" fiberglass poles like people mark the end of their drive with for permeanat marks. He still yelps if a Squirel tricks him.
5. He has a dog house and a dog bed, but prefers the concrete under my truck to sleep. He has a crooked tail and a limp, but still finds this the most comfortable spot on our property.

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And I will beat the ever loving shite out of you if you want to meet me IRL. I have a reputation for fighting. You live in BR?

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I hear people talk about certain breeds of dogs being smart (eg, poodles), but what specifically makes them smart?

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problem solving abilities, ability to understand words, etc. my parents have poodles that ring a bell when they want to go outside. my dad gets up around 6 to head to the office and the female poodle usually jumps up in his spot. on the weekends, if he sleeps till 7 or 8, the female will go and ring the bell to lure him out of bed and into the kitchen. he will open the door and she will just head into the bedroom and take his spot. it's like she knows there is a routine and when it's broken, she knows how to right the ship.

when your dog is calm, sit down with them and have them focus on you. time them until they break eye contact. the hunting dog trainer we sent ours to does not take dogs if they cant hold it for 10 seconds. our poodles went for 45 and 52 secs.

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I've always read that if you flip your dog a treat, and he doesn't come close to reacting and catching it in his mouth, he's dumb. True story.

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My smart dog doesn't trust me usually with the first throw. He let's it hit the ground, checks it out, eats it, then catches subsequent throws. My dumb dog would swallow a cherry bomb if I threw it to her.

#1: It's a dog. Ask it a question about the order of operations to find out how smart it is.