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Started By
Message
The narrator of "I'll be Home for Christmas" is a real piece of work
Posted on 12/26/25 at 9:58 am
Posted on 12/26/25 at 9:58 am
This guy, what a fricking dickbag
First of all, he says you can COUNT on him being home. So you make plans for this guy, making sure to work your life around him.
Then he sends his lists of demands:
1) Have presents on the tree. Alright well we were gonna have presents anyway. Placing them on the actual tree is a weird demand and putting little Timmy's bike on there might be logistically challenging, but let's do it.
2) Have mistletoe, alright we can do that.
3) "Have snow". Motherfricker, you want me to manipulate the weather? You think I am god? How can I promise that shite?
And then get this, after demanding weather manipulation, presents, mistletoe, and promising that he will be home...saying you can count on it...
This frickface says actually he will only be home in his dreams. He wasn't actually planning on coming for Christmas at all, so this was a whole lot of nothing.
What a dick.
First of all, he says you can COUNT on him being home. So you make plans for this guy, making sure to work your life around him.
Then he sends his lists of demands:
1) Have presents on the tree. Alright well we were gonna have presents anyway. Placing them on the actual tree is a weird demand and putting little Timmy's bike on there might be logistically challenging, but let's do it.
2) Have mistletoe, alright we can do that.
3) "Have snow". Motherfricker, you want me to manipulate the weather? You think I am god? How can I promise that shite?
And then get this, after demanding weather manipulation, presents, mistletoe, and promising that he will be home...saying you can count on it...
This frickface says actually he will only be home in his dreams. He wasn't actually planning on coming for Christmas at all, so this was a whole lot of nothing.
What a dick.
10
Posted on 12/26/25 at 9:59 am to Fun Bunch
I don’t think he’s real.
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:01 am to Fun Bunch
OK, I'll bite. You couldn't be more wrong in your analysis. Go look up what the song means Ebenezer Scrooge.
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:04 am to Fun Bunch
A) narrator ?
B) he says IF ONLY
B) he says IF ONLY
This post was edited on 12/26/25 at 10:05 am
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:05 am to Fun Bunch
quote:
This frickface says actually he will only be home in his dreams. He wasn't actually planning on coming for Christmas at all, so this was a whole lot of nothing.
What a dick.
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:07 am to Fun Bunch
Sounded funnier in your head
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:07 am to Fun Bunch
I feel like you missed a pretty key point in the lyrics: "If only in my dreams...."
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:07 am to Fun Bunch
*Spoilers*
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:09 am to Fun Bunch
Actually, he was dead the whole time. It's from the viewpoint of a fallen soldier
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:10 am to UKWildcats
quote:
I feel like you missed a pretty key point in the lyrics: "If only in my dreams...."
quote:
This frickface says actually he will only be home in his dreams. He wasn't actually planning on coming for Christmas at all, so this was a whole lot of nothing.
He only tells them that after he gives his list of demands and makes them plan for his arrival
For those arguing that the original song is from that of a WW2 soldier stationed overseas, this is revisionism from Bing Crosby. The song was first written in 1922 as a poem
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:11 am to GrammarKnotsi
quote:
B) he says IF ONLY
Only after his promise and demands.
… I'll be home for Christmas
You can plan on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
And presents on the tree
… Christmas Eve will find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Christmas
If only in my dreams
… I'll be home for Christmas
You can plan on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
And presents on the tree
… Christmas Eve'll find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Christmas
If only in my dreams
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:29 am to Fun Bunch
quote:
The song was first written in 1922 as a poem
From the viewpoint Of a soldier
Who can only be home for Christmas in his dreams
What happened not long before that?
What would leave his loved ones longing and wishing for a Christmas return that would never happen?
This post was edited on 12/26/25 at 10:30 am
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:31 am to fr33manator
quote:
Actually, he was dead the whole time. It's from the viewpoint of a fallen soldier
Oof
Posted on 12/26/25 at 10:37 am to Fun Bunch
I'll one up you
In Holly Jolly Christmas, the guy sings "ho, ho the mistletoe, hung where you can see. Somebody waits for you, kiss her once for me."
What kind of sicko that neither me or my girl have ever met is wanting me to kiss her for him? Is he some sex pervert who gets off on stuff like that?
In Holly Jolly Christmas, the guy sings "ho, ho the mistletoe, hung where you can see. Somebody waits for you, kiss her once for me."
What kind of sicko that neither me or my girl have ever met is wanting me to kiss her for him? Is he some sex pervert who gets off on stuff like that?
Posted on 12/26/25 at 11:35 am to PJinAtl
quote:
In Holly Jolly Christmas, the guy sings "ho, ho the mistletoe, hung where you can see. Somebody waits for you, kiss her once for me."
Yeah this line is nutty. What is he even asking here? He wants me to kiss some random chick but think of him while I do it? Or kiss her and then tell her “this kiss is on behalf of this other dude”
Posted on 12/26/25 at 2:01 pm to fr33manator
quote:My mom went to University of Illinois. The song was written by a fellow Illini. He was a student, not a soldier. He wrote the poem to his mom.quote:From the viewpoint Of a soldier
The song was first written in 1922 as a poem
Who can only be home for Christmas in his dreams
What happened not long before that?
What would leave his loved ones longing and wishing for a Christmas return that would never happen?
Posted on 12/26/25 at 2:06 pm to Salviati
Well well well, once again the boring truth rearing its ugly head to spoil a good story
Posted on 12/26/25 at 2:08 pm to Fun Bunch
OP should come out of the Lockett Hall basement sometimes and get some fresh air and sunshine
Posted on 12/26/25 at 2:35 pm to cypresstiger
quote:
OP should come out of the Lockett Hall basement sometimes and get some fresh air and sunshine
Wait until the OP finds out Santa's not real. He's really going to lose it!
Posted on 12/26/25 at 2:43 pm to Salviati
quote:
The song was written by a fellow Illini. He was a student, not a soldier. He wrote the poem to his mom.
wrong...about the lyricist:
quote:
Gannon was born in Brooklyn, New York to an Irish-American family from Fort Ann in upstate New York, but grew up in New Jersey where he attended Montclair High School and was a member of Omega Gamma Delta fraternity. He graduated from St. Lawrence University and, intending to become a lawyer, attended the Albany Law School, passing the bar examination in New York State in 1934.
about the song:
quote:
The song is sung from the point of view of a soldier stationed overseas during World War II, writing a letter to his family. In the message, he tells his family he will be coming home and to prepare the holiday for him, and requests snow, mistletoe, and presents "on" the tree. The song ends on a melancholy note, with the soldier saying, "I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams".
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