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Started By
Message
Dudes dropping out of dating game.
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:21 pm
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:21 pm
Written by a woman, of course.
Free Press website.
Free Press website.
quote:
The men I spoke with—ranging from ages 17 to 33 and living in rural New Jersey to Austin, Texas—said they felt overlooked in a competitive dating market, where women often list salary requirements and height preferences on their profiles.
To see if things were as bad as they claimed, I joined two major dating platforms—Tinder and Hinge—and posed as a hip, 30-year-old business owner with a full head of hair and a degree from NYU. A few swipes in, I spotted a busty blonde leaning over in a halter dress with the caption, “Together we could find out if you’re lying about your height.”
Then, a 22-year-old, captured in a selfie at her work cubicle with her cleavage resting on her desk, wrote: “Don’t superlike me if ur ugly I already have a lot going on.”
Another woman, a five-feet-two-inch bombshell named Ashly, warned men: “If you [are] one of those ‘split the check’ or not wealthy. . . NEXT.”
That financial pressure is what screws men over most, said Jess Carbino, the former in-house sociologist for Tinder and Bumble.
“The traditional markers of adulthood like buying a home, completing college, and getting married, are all becoming far harder to achieve,” Carbino said. “Many men perceive themselves to be far less marriageable. And in turn, many women perceive them to be less marriageable, too.”
She says it’s never been easy to be Joe Average on the dating market but things are rougher now that the average man’s salary, which hovers just above $61,000 in the U.S., is hardly enough to afford rent in most major American cities. Yet still, many women hold out for men who make not just as much or more than they do, but are also wildly attractive.
The result? Men at the tip-top of the dating pool get everything. And the men who don’t have it all get nothing.
But even the alphas are feeling the squeeze.
One New York City–based psychologist, David Gordon, says many of the high-powered men he treats—including doctors, lawyers, and financiers—fret over their ability to attract a woman, despite their enviable salaries or careers.
“It’s kind of sad or tragic, but some guys will look at their bank accounts, stocks, or credit score every day, as if it’s some sort of measure of their value,” he says. “We can look at the numbers, and I’m like, ‘Dude, looks pretty good to me.’ ” ...
And then there’s the problem of not knowing how to approach a woman. He suspects his coworker might have a crush on him, and yet he worries that one wrong move and he’ll be labeled “creepy.”
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:24 pm to SuperSaint
I read it - not sure why OP says ‘written by a woman, of course’
It summarizes a lot of what guys complain about here on the OT
It summarizes a lot of what guys complain about here on the OT
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:26 pm to prplhze2000
quote:
ranging from ages 17 to 33 and living in rural New Jersey to Austin, Texas—said they felt overlooked in a competitive dating market, where women often list salary requirements and height preferences on their profiles.
I'm not asking some 17 year old high school kid about the dating game as it pertains to salary or anything else. Hell, pretty much anyone under 25-30 in this topic its strictly just going to be about looks. The good looking guys who aren't complete choads will get all the women.
People that look like oweo are 'dropping out of the game'
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:26 pm to prplhze2000
#greatwallo’text
You trying to out OweO OweO here?
You trying to out OweO OweO here?
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:26 pm to GreenRockTiger
quote:
I read it - not sure why OP says ‘written by a woman, of course’
I had the same thought after reading the blurb in the OP. My immediate thought was “none of that seemed unfair or unreasonable…”
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:27 pm to Deactived
quote:people like OweO were never really in the dating game
People that look like oweo are 'dropping out of the game'
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:29 pm to SuperSaint
Target the never married no kids hot skunts 32-40. They eventually let their guard and game down.
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:30 pm to prplhze2000
quote:
But even the alphas are feeling the squeeze.
Ok One New York City–based psychologist, David Gordon, says many of the high-powered men he treats—including doctors, lawyers, and financiers—fret over their ability to attract a woman, despite their enviable salaries or careers. “It’s kind of sad or tragic, but some guys will look at their bank accounts, stocks, or credit score every day, as if it’s some sort of measure of their value,” he says. “We can look at the numbers, and I’m like, ‘Dude, looks pretty good to me.’ ” ... And then there’s the problem of not knowing how to approach a woman. He suspects his coworker might have a crush on him, and yet he worries that one wrong move and he’ll be labeled “creepy.”
Such lazy “journalism”. Those men she lists as alpha are only so when it comes to $$$.
Your can have plenty if $$$ but in the end you’re only getting them four your $$$. Which is fine, if you can sleep at night with that sad knowledge.
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:31 pm to prplhze2000
I saw rural New Jersey to AUSTIN, Texas. My first thoughts a bunch of liberal beta men that can't cut it.
This post was edited on 1/3/24 at 10:43 pm
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:32 pm to SuperSaint
That's why I included the 'xx'. He would say he dropped out when you and I knew he never knew where the game was.
A face even a mother wouldn't love. That's why they kill their animals
A face even a mother wouldn't love. That's why they kill their animals
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:35 pm to Deactived
Stout would be so disappointed in you for getting so personal on a message board.
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:36 pm to prplhze2000
Not 10 years ago a dude who had a steady, decent, job, wasn’t a creeper, and wasn’t an addict stood at the top 5-10% of single 20’s to early 30s guys. I know because that is how my wife described me. Apparently the dating scene in New Orleans was easier than I was thinking. We had a friend in the group circle who was very popular but something to me was off. His parents paid for everything and he was as I described an absolute loser.
I am guessing things have changed. Maybe women are expecting what the previous generation was receiving, but reality is wages haven’t kept up with inflation and more dudes can’t afford to be the sole bread winner anymore. Perhaps they should vote better (not likely).
Generational bashing aside, I find the interaction of our younger generations fascinating to observe against my own experiences at that age.
I am guessing things have changed. Maybe women are expecting what the previous generation was receiving, but reality is wages haven’t kept up with inflation and more dudes can’t afford to be the sole bread winner anymore. Perhaps they should vote better (not likely).
Generational bashing aside, I find the interaction of our younger generations fascinating to observe against my own experiences at that age.
Posted on 1/3/24 at 11:21 pm to prplhze2000
Proving that modern women are pretty much just whores as in men that frick for money
Posted on 1/3/24 at 11:44 pm to prplhze2000
I don't know. I have it all, I guess. 6'2", decent shape, own a house, own a business. I just don't care.
This post was edited on 1/3/24 at 11:45 pm
Posted on 1/4/24 at 12:56 am to prplhze2000
quote:
The result? Men at the tip-top of the dating pool get everything. And the men who don’t have it all get nothing.
I keep reading this everywhere, but it doesn’t make sense to me. I can’t speak for young women today, but 20 years ago when I wasn’t a fossil, women were driven towards marriage at younger ages than men. It seemed like it was the guys who had an inability to commit. Assuming young women are still driven to settle down and marry or just to get in a long term relationship, it seems like they would figure out pretty quickly that super hot successful guy isn’t interested in anything but sex and move on. The whole premise of this argument that the top 10% of men get 80% of the women assumes that women aren’t driven to have relationships beyond just sex and that they are too stupid to see the odds are stacked against them. It doesn’t add up to me.
Also, sounds like if you are lucky enough to find an amazing girl in your early/mid 20s, you would be a dumbass to let her go.
Posted on 1/4/24 at 1:23 am to prplhze2000
quote:
Then, a 22-year-old, captured in a selfie at her work cubicle with her cleavage resting on her desk, wrote: “Don’t superlike me if ur ugly I already have a lot going on.”
Another woman, a five-feet-two-inch bombshell named Ashly, warned men: “If you [are] one of those ‘split the check’ or not wealthy. . . NEXT.”
Boys, dodged some bullets there. Guys shouldn't be interested in women like this anyway. Same bitches that will take half your stuff a few years later.
Posted on 1/4/24 at 1:30 am to pelicanpride
quote:
I keep reading this everywhere, but it doesn’t make sense to me. I can’t speak for young women today, but 20 years ago when I wasn’t a fossil, women were driven towards marriage at younger ages than men.
Several guys have looked up the stats on this, and female dating and mating habits started changing radically at almost exactly the same time as social media became big... the mid 2000's. When the smartphone become common, smartphone usage and female "pickiness" rocketed upward at almost the same trajectory. The data points are almost mirrored. Around 2012, female selection standards for men became truly ridiculous, and have never receded to pre-Internet levels.
Women have ALWAYS been the more selective about men, and have always been more valued sexually in youth than men ("Sperm is cheap, Eggs are expensive"), but the Internet supercharged the process to the point where expectations from the fairer sex have just become delusional until they hit their mid 30's. The Internet acts as a funhouse mirror, distorting reality. And since dating apps now dominate HOW women meet most men, it acts as a nuclear accelerator for the distortion process.
Posted on 1/4/24 at 1:37 am to prplhze2000
quote:
which hovers just above $61,000 in the U.S., is hardly enough to afford rent in most major American cities
Not the point but not so sure about this part
Maybe if you don't live within your means (does anyone anymore?)
Posted on 1/4/24 at 4:07 am to prplhze2000
quote:
The result? Men at the tip-top of the dating pool get everything. And the men who don’t have it all get nothing.
The way it’s always been.
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