re: Least favorite Christmas gifts over the years

My mother in law gave me some ugly penny loafers she found on clearance that were 1.5 sizes too small but I couldn't return/exchange them. My wife guilted me into wearing them that day at their house for Christmas. Hurt like hell. Shoes are still in my closet for some reason although I've never worn them again.

My hs girlfriend got a star named after us. Hated it then and still hate it 20 years later.

For some reason my mom told my aunt one year I was really into juggling. I had spent like 2 hours one summer afternoon teaching myself how to do it with tennis balls when I was bored in my backyard and then never thought about it again. Apparently, that stuck with my mom. This is like 8th grade.

Fast forward 6 months, my aunt gave me several books on juggling, juggling bowling pins, and juggling balls. Probably spent $150 on juggling shite. Unreal, went straight to goodwill

My uncle got me the Bogle game. Next year, got me Bogle again.

My grandmother, may she RIP, grew up a poor in McComb and always seemed to equate Christmas with unwrapping as many things as possible. Quantity >>>> Quality.

She'd rather give you 7 shitty things to unwrap than 1 halfway nice thing. To her that meant a happier Christmas. We're talking about wrapping up the Bank's free calendar and giving it to her grandson - those types of gifts. She also never ever took a price tag off of anything.

In my jr high years, I had an Atari when they were way past being cool, but it was my treasured possession. Leading up to Christmas, my grandmother bought me a game for my Atari. I could tell because I knew where she hid everything. She was not very good at wrapping so I could always peel back and see what it was. It was Megamania. What the heck? What I wanted most was the [I actually can't even remember the name of it, but it was the most important game in my life to acquire at the time; we'll say Zaxxon] game. I dreamed of it.

Right before Christmas me and my grandmother went to the store and sure enough there was Megamania on the Atari game super discount shelf. My grandmother looks at and says, "what about this game?" I saw the chance to make a play for Zaxxon so I said, "Meh, that one is pretty boring. Zaxxon is really cool." She just walked away.

Come Christmas morning, I opened the game and it was... Megamania. She wasn't going to get away from the discount rack. Of course I felt like a heel. She offered to take it back and I said, "No! This is great! Thanks!"

Ironically, I quickly loved the Megamania game and wore it out.

My MIL is a nice thoughtful woman that really tries with gifts but they usually fall flatter than Taylor Swift's chest.

When we were just getting to know each other she figured out I liked watches because I was always wearing a different one. That Christmas she bought me a pocket watch. A fine Chinese quartz one with a Christmas train on the cover. Lord she tried and I love her for it but I don't think I ever even took it out of the box.

Honestly probably didn't smell that much differently...

Not too many bad gifts over the years, now I get car stuff or electronics.

I used to drink a lot of Crown Royal. One year my wife got my a Crown Royal Nascar jacket. I don't watch Nascar and at that time the only people who wore Nascar jackets were thuggish.
I use it now as my mechanics coat.

Though this year was my first Christmas single and not buying any or giving any top dollar gifts was odd.