re: Random things that make you realize you’re getting old

One day you see a single gray hair, a week later you can’t unsee there are 50 all over your scalp. Same thing with facial hair - a small patch of white hair turns into a meadow before you know it.

I love the cold, but now I FEEL the cold. My lower back, shoulders, and lower extremities feel like I just played “tackle the man with the football” for 5 hours.

The lawncare thing is a good one. I used to hate that shite growing up but now I’m bumping music in my shed at 8:45 on a Saturday getting hyped up to rev that weed whacker at 9 sharp. I’ll spend the entire morning in the yard and won’t come in until lunch is ready.

Nose, eyebrow, and ear hair running amok. Also that grey hair grows twice as fast as dark colored hair.

what age are we exactly defining as old?

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My lower back, shoulders, and lower extremities feel like I just played “tackle the man with the football” for 5 hours.

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If even old guys are calling the game, “tackle the man with the football”, and are afraid to call it “smear the queer” on an anonymous message board, then I am definitely getting old.

Just don’t get me started on what we called those fireworks without fins that you light and throw only to have them chase you in an irregular flight pattern.

Retirement means checking the weather forecast to figure out what you will be wearing.

If above 70, which pair of cargo shorts am I wearing, which LSU hat to wear, polo no tuck shirts and IDGAF what anyone thinks.

If below 35, screw it, staying home.

Looking through MLB lineups and seeing the DOBs. Ouch.

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Random things that make you realize you’re getting old

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When I started taking Viagra so I don't pee on my shoes

I recently had my 20 yr HS reunion and I was having to ask who the parents of the kids were.

I definitely use my car seat warmers to ease my back pain.