re: King of the Hill turns 25 today

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Hank hill is basically the average middle aged OT poster.

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An All-Texas Super Bowl

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Hank is just remarkably well-written as a character. His logic is borderline flawless, even though he's just a regular arse working dude. But just the way his brain works is hilarious.

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Mr. JUDGE: Well, you know, I had a paper route when I was a kid in Albuquerque, New Mexico, and on my paper route, there was a guy, it was the first time my brother and I shared this paper route, and we'd go collect at the end of every month, and this guy was always out on his front lawn drinking a beer, and we came to collect, and it was our first time collecting, and this guy looks at us and is kind of staring at us.

I said hey, we're collecting for the Albuquerque News, and he says: Well, you ain't my paper boy. And I said, well, I know, but your paper boy quit, and we're the new paper boys. Well, I know what my paper boy looks like, and you ain't my paper boy.

And I said, well, yeah, he's gone and, you know, and then he brings his wife over and says: See the paper boy? No. This went on. We said well, we're going to cancel the paper then. He said: Oh, I'm going to get the paper when the real paper boy comes.

And so, we just kept delivering, and we'd skip his house, and he'd be out there drinking his beer, kind of eyeballing us. And finally, he swallowed his pride after, like, four months, and he called in a subscription.

I mean, the other - there was also - when the first time my ex-wife and I, we bought a house outside of Dallas, and there'd be these guys out there drinking their beers in the alley and, you know, like I was - the storm had, like, blown off, just knocked loose a little part of my fence.

So I went out there, and I was - you know, I got a hammer, and I'm just thinking, okay, I'll just nail this thing back there. And I see this guy over, kind of eyeballing me, looking at what I'm doing, and then he comes over, followed by a couple others, and he says: Well, you're going to have to take the whole section out, and this post here is a little rotted. And then before I know it, one of them brings over a wheelbarrow. They'd yanked out the whole thing. They're digging up a fence post, they're pouring concrete or mixing concrete, and finally, I kind of became kind of useless.

I went back inside, and my wife at the time, like, you know, we hadn't even eaten breakfast, and we're looking out the window, and she goes, what's going on? And I said, oh, they're building me a fence, I guess.

And then I went back out there. Finally, they got the post set, and they did the string across, whatever, and he's saying, you know, you've got to leave a one-inch gap. Otherwise, them termites are going to get on your palings.

And so he tells me how to do it. I start putting on the palings. This is much -you know, like three or four hours later. I'm hammering the nails in. I see him over, and he peeks his head out of the alley, and he's looking at me, and he walks over, and I'm going, oh God, what now? And he comes over, and he says: Those are the wrong kind of nails. You're going to need galvanized steel. Here, I'll go get you some.

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Judge's story of the character being based on his new neighbors in Texas is pretty funny.

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