Colbert on Dr Seuss cancelation: “It’s the responsible move on their part.”

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You know when Jimmy Kimmel is making sense saying this is woke insanity and shite like this is going to get Trump re-elected, you’ve gone into full despotic, batshit crazy, and full blown pussy mode

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It’s a responsible move on their part. There hadn’t been an earth shattering outcry but they recognized the impact this may have on readers, especially kids, and they’re trying to fix it because Dr Seuss books should be fun for all people. Black, white, straight, gay Sneetchers both star bellies and and plain, loraxes, barbaloots, all the Whos down in Whoville, and a strange creature named Foo Foo the Snoo.

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A responsible move?! What kid anywhere gets offended by If I Ran a Zoo? What kid doesn’t like that book? Of remaining family estates in entertainment, Dr Seuss’ family is #2 behind Michael Jackson’s family that receive royalties for their respected work. This is fricking Joseph Goebbels levels of bullshite. Yes thank the Fuhrer for going out and burning those books, because now we don’t have to worry about them corrupting our kids with thoughts of wacky zoo animals.

And by the way they’re threatening as we speak to ban The Cat in the Hat. Hey Stephen, what if they ban How the Grinch Stole Christmas because it leaves non-Christians being felt left out?

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Now it’s especially important in responses like this because Dr Seuss also has so many books that are lovely that teach vital lessons that resonate to this day.

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Oh don’t worry, we just burnt every copy of Hamlet, Macbeth, and Julius Caesar, but Shakespeare has 30 other wonderful plays you can read. What’s the big deal about banning those? Yeah we also destroyed Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, but Mark Twain has some damn good stories besides those.

Honestly, advice to everyone, go buy physical copies of classics now. I’ll be shocked if WALL-E is on Disney+ by the end of the year, since I guarantee some fat assholes are going to try to get it banned, even if the film is extremely relevant now, or should I say ESPECIALLY since the film is extremely relevant now. Others to go buy:

Gone with the Wind
Dumbo
Tropic Thunder
Aristocats
Peter Pan
Lady and the Tramp
Mary Poppins (some idiot will accuse Dick Van Dyke of blackface)
Blazing Saddles
The Producers
Animal House
Mr Mom
Gremlins 1 & 2
Airplane!
Team America: World Police
Any John Wayne movie
Rocky Horror Picture Show
The Little Mermaid
Breakfast at Tiffany’s
Gangs of New York
Every Quentin Tarantino movie
Zoolander
Big Trouble in Little China
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Silence of the Lambs
Idiocracy
Early Tarzan films
V for Vendetta