re: What’s your favorite public place to take a sh**?

Irish Kevin's in Key West.

Phenomenal little water closet, especially for a pub.

Cherry wood furnishings and exceptionally clean.

Sometimes I hold it just so I can go there.

Lowes.
Even if I don’t need to take a dump on the way to the store, for some reason prob 90% time just being in the store makes have to go.

Did you check your shoes before you put them on

Walgreens and Goodwill are the only public places I'll drop a deuce.

State Palace Theater about 4 hours into a rave.

3rd Floor LSU Union

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Lowes. Even if I don’t need to take a dump on the way to the store, for some reason prob 90% time just being in the store makes have to go.

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There’s actually been recent article describing this. Theory being that the vagus nerve being stimulated by swarm of distinct smells including lumber, potting soils, paints, fertilizers, etc. It makes a subset of folks need to go.

Apparently you aren’t alone

As someone who has shite his pants too many times to count while traveling, Home Depot can be risky because the bathroom is sometimes in the far back or to the side of the store. A lot of ground to cover while clenching & having contractions. My gall bladder also is gone and sometimes the pressure makes everything come slickin out without much warning. Businesses with an up-front bathroom like a hotel lobby is the answer if you are close by.

Spinoff: worst ever

Driving New Orleans to Baton Rouge early one morning. An irresistible force came over me and I stopped first exit which was McDonald’s … in Laplace I think or maybe closer to Sorrento.

Place is empty. Great.

Go in bathroom and it’s a photo finish. Theres a private toilet room with full door and it’s clean. Great. I made it, YAY what a relief. But I’m in there a little too long and the automatic lights go out. It’s pitch black. I can’t see anything. There’s nothing I can do and I don’t even know where to reach for the toilet paper.

I started waving my hands in the dark and making noise and banging the wall. Pitch black. What am I going to do? This was many years before iPhone flashlight days. It’s pitch black and I know I’m in trouble because I need lights to see and confirm I cleaned up adequately. But I can’t even see my hand in front of my face.

Then magically the lights come back on out of nowhere. I wiped as fast as possible and pulled up my pants and ran out. I still think an angel came and saved me that morning.

The last kohls restroom I was in was super weird. There was no toilet, but it had 3 full length mirrors.