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Started By
Message
re: The worst meal your significant other has cooked for you
Posted on 9/22/20 at 10:52 am to BoogaBear
Posted on 9/22/20 at 10:52 am to BoogaBear
quote:
My wife forgot to put water in one of those Kraft mac and cheese microwave bowls. It caught on fire in the microwave.
The smell lingered for a week.
Is she bad at directions too?
0
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:00 am to RT1941
quote:
I'm shocked at the number of men that are the main cook in their households.
For me, it's a control thing. I love to cook, so when I see her cooking and doing something wrong I feel I have to take over. She doesn't really care for cooking so is happy to let me handle it all. I even do 90% of the grocery shopping because she buys the wrong stuff half the time.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:17 am to MsBhamTiger
my wife, then a girlfriend at the time, cooked me a meal on my last night in the states before I left for Iraq in 07 for 9 month deployment
it was supposed to be beef stroganoff, but she cooked the noodles way to long and ended it looking like mashed potatoes.
it was supposed to be beef stroganoff, but she cooked the noodles way to long and ended it looking like mashed potatoes.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:25 am to The Spleen
quote:
I'm shocked at the number of men that are the main cook in their households.
quote:I know a couple of close friends that are the exact same way. She can cook, he loves to cook and rarely gives her any peace in the kitchen to do what she wants her way, so she lets him do it all.
For me, it's a control thing. I love to cook, so when I see her cooking and doing something wrong I feel I have to take over. She doesn't really care for cooking so is happy to let me handle it all. I even do 90% of the grocery shopping because she buys the wrong stuff half the time.
My wife is often jealous of them as she hates grocery shopping and gets sick of trying to think of something to fix for dinner.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:33 am to MsBhamTiger
My wife's a good cook, but she's a much better baker, pies, dessert breads, brownies, cookies, are all exceptional. She has the patience to measure ingredients exactly which is a requirement for a good baker. That being said in order to make dinner dishes more nutritious and low sodium she sometimes skimps on salt and certain dishes lack flavor. Nothing hot sauce or sriracha can't fix though.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:36 am to MsBhamTiger
My wife once used baking soda instead of baking powder in pancakes.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:42 am to fallguy_1978
quote:Fallguy I feel like I would get along well with your wife
Some of my wife's Pinterest crafts she's attempted have been downright hilarious. She almost set the house on fire with her homemade citronella torches ?
My citronella candle making was also hilarious. And waaayyyyy too much work for a few small candles.Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:43 am to RT1941
quote:
she hates grocery shopping and gets sick of trying to think of something to fix for dinner.
My frustration is I'll go through the trouble of planning a menu for the week, start making a grocery list, go over the menu for the week, and the wife will come back with a "why does everything have to be so fancy?!" So I'll ask what she wants, and she'll suggest Manwich sloppy joe's or a boxed taco kit or something. A few months ago I made a restaurant quality beef stroganoff. Didn't tell her I was making it beforehand. She talked about how good it was for weeks. I suggested doing it again last week, and she turned her nose up. "Can't we just do Hamburger Helper?"
Christ, woman!
Posted on 9/22/20 at 12:00 pm to The Spleen
I do 99% of the cooking and shopping in my house. The wife can't cook for shite and I'm good with that. I like being the cook because I cook what I like to eat. I can't fault the wife for not cooking because she eats like a bird anyway so in her mind why cook, plus her and the MIL (who lives with us now) stay Keto all the time. When our son was little he would tell people his momma couldn't even cook frozen chicken nuggets right 
That said: worst meal I ever made them decades ago was a shrimp boil with way too much seasoning. It was so hot you could not eat it.
That said: worst meal I ever made them decades ago was a shrimp boil with way too much seasoning. It was so hot you could not eat it.
This post was edited on 9/22/20 at 12:02 pm
Posted on 9/22/20 at 5:07 pm to MsBhamTiger
Early in our 41 year marriage, Mrs. M found she had no breadcrumbs for her normally magnificent meatloaf.
It, with mashed potatoes, and a succulent vegetable medley was a great favorite of yours truly and a surreptitious suggestion of possible better things in the offing after the children had been put to bed.
In a panic having to choose between loading the children and driving to the store for breadcrumbs or using the nearest potential substitute-in this instance-Chex cereal-Mrs. M chose the cereal grinding it to powder and mixing it in with the ground meat and other ingredients.
I came home, got out of my suit, rolled around on the floor with the brats, playing gently with the daughters and roughing up the sons mercilessly, and we all went to the kitchen table to eat when summoned by The Empress.
I should have been tipped off by the solemn quiet and wide eyed stares in anticipation of my first bite of Mrs. M's (now) legendary, and dare I say it, infamous meatloaf.
I was unable to hide my disgust with its taste despite trying my best in hopes of sparing the good lady's feelings. Alas, the curling up of my nose, the squenching of my eyes, and my lips' contortions gave me away. Dear God in Heaven, that meatloaf was horrid and inedible!
But, as I looked around, my entire clan, including Goodwoman Misanthrope were all suppressing, mostly unsuccessfully, uproarious and convulsive laughter. Having sampled the abomination prior to my arrival they all had conspired to keep me in the dark to observe my reaction.
Had I figured it out earlier I'd have pretended to love it and force them all to eat it with me. As it turned out, I went out and got us burgers to go with the mashed potatoes and vegetables.
All part of the rich and colorful tapestry of our marriage.
It, with mashed potatoes, and a succulent vegetable medley was a great favorite of yours truly and a surreptitious suggestion of possible better things in the offing after the children had been put to bed.
In a panic having to choose between loading the children and driving to the store for breadcrumbs or using the nearest potential substitute-in this instance-Chex cereal-Mrs. M chose the cereal grinding it to powder and mixing it in with the ground meat and other ingredients.
I came home, got out of my suit, rolled around on the floor with the brats, playing gently with the daughters and roughing up the sons mercilessly, and we all went to the kitchen table to eat when summoned by The Empress.
I should have been tipped off by the solemn quiet and wide eyed stares in anticipation of my first bite of Mrs. M's (now) legendary, and dare I say it, infamous meatloaf.
I was unable to hide my disgust with its taste despite trying my best in hopes of sparing the good lady's feelings. Alas, the curling up of my nose, the squenching of my eyes, and my lips' contortions gave me away. Dear God in Heaven, that meatloaf was horrid and inedible!
But, as I looked around, my entire clan, including Goodwoman Misanthrope were all suppressing, mostly unsuccessfully, uproarious and convulsive laughter. Having sampled the abomination prior to my arrival they all had conspired to keep me in the dark to observe my reaction.
Had I figured it out earlier I'd have pretended to love it and force them all to eat it with me. As it turned out, I went out and got us burgers to go with the mashed potatoes and vegetables.
All part of the rich and colorful tapestry of our marriage.
This post was edited on 9/22/20 at 5:30 pm
Posted on 9/22/20 at 5:10 pm to Mr. Misanthrope
quote:
About a year into our marriage
quote:
after the five children had been put to bed.
Uhh.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 5:27 pm to No Colors
quote:
Uhh.
Yeah, I gotta edit. I'm trying to place the kitchen, the job, the suit, the actual number of kids and I'm off a bit. Probably four kids and six years. So long ago.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 5:29 pm to MsBhamTiger
When we first started dating, she tried to make ribs in the crock pot and accidentally made jerky. Ate every bite.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 6:01 pm to theOG
I do 99% of the cooking at my house. I learned from mama, grandmother and from chefs when I delivered seafood to most of Baton Rouge's restaurants. I tend to cook like a chef and always have an entree (protein) at least one starch (potatoes, rice, pasta, etc.) a vegetable, and a dessert. She is a casserole queen and likes to make it all in one dish. About 6 months after we were married she cooked what she called a crawfish pie. I have to admit it looked pretty until we cut into it. She had taken whole live crawfish, made some kind of sauce with various cream soups, and put it all into a pie crust with a top crust of phyllo dough. When I served up a slice of the pie, I had a bunch of in the shell crawfish immersed in a soup/sauce that looked like something a cat would vomit up in a burnt pie crust.
We almost had a divorce over that one since I refused to even taste it, much less eat it!!
After 25 years of marriage, she can make an awesome crawfish pie now but she learned to use tail meat and to make a thickened butter sauce and a homemade pie dough but every time she wants to cook it I remind her about the first one. LOL.
We almost had a divorce over that one since I refused to even taste it, much less eat it!!
After 25 years of marriage, she can make an awesome crawfish pie now but she learned to use tail meat and to make a thickened butter sauce and a homemade pie dough but every time she wants to cook it I remind her about the first one. LOL.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 6:15 pm to MsBhamTiger
Many many years ago my wife was making cinnamon toast and accidently put celery salt on it instead. God almighty damn
This post was edited on 9/22/20 at 6:17 pm
Posted on 9/22/20 at 6:24 pm to LSUGUMBO
quote:
make a green bean casserole
First time I did it, I didn’t drain the green beans. Green bean casserole soup is what we had.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 6:56 pm to MsBhamTiger
Wife’s a fantastic cook you might have seen her on TV 
Posted on 9/22/20 at 7:01 pm to MsBhamTiger
Early in the marriage she made beef stroganoff; I have no idea why as neither her family nor mine had ever made that.
The dog wouldn’t eat it.
Now, she watches shows where some guy/gal has the latest/greatest food fad that will help you reduce weight or look 20 years younger. None of those recipes are ever good.
Although she was watching one yesterday where the cook was making burgers with 40% fat. That lady said “fat is the new kale”; so that one might work for me.
The dog wouldn’t eat it.
Now, she watches shows where some guy/gal has the latest/greatest food fad that will help you reduce weight or look 20 years younger. None of those recipes are ever good.
Although she was watching one yesterday where the cook was making burgers with 40% fat. That lady said “fat is the new kale”; so that one might work for me.
Posted on 9/22/20 at 10:04 pm to MsBhamTiger
Never had an so but I made a terrible salmon . Was undercooked
Are most Americans terrible cooks ?
Are most Americans terrible cooks ?
This post was edited on 9/22/20 at 10:07 pm
Posted on 9/22/20 at 11:15 pm to Boo Krewe
My wife was an incredible cook as she always started off with lots & lots of red pepper & then added the food. To this day there is no such thing as too spic food for me & our sons. But she never could replicate Mom's homemade cornbread or pecan pie.
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