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re: Tackiest/trashiest/most poorly planned wedding you've ever been to?
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:46 am to VolsOut4Harambe
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:46 am to VolsOut4Harambe
frickin hipster wedding!!! IT's a long read but reading about this hipster trainwreck will be worth it
The bride and groom choose to have it at a really weird art gallery/shop type place..and by art I mean like barbie dolls in wooden boxes kinda shite. Anyway... we get to the "ceremony" part and there is literally maybe a dozen chairs for 50 or more people....so just about everyone was standing.
When the ceremony did start the bride walked down the aisle to an old man playing the french national anthem on the guitar which turned into random improv riffing...I guess... at one point it sounded like he had a stroke...or forgot how to play the thing cause he hit 4 wrong chords and the music just stopped...so she finished her walk in silence.... when at the alter the minister of course opened with "we are gathered here today to celebrate a little thing called life" a few people chuckled...most cringed.
The best part was this place was so tiny that they had to kick everyone out of the main room and say ok guys...ummm were gonna reset but come back in like 15-20 mins. So for 15 minutes we were all crammed in the weird arse art gallery.... passing the time by checking out weird paintings and shite that looked like it came from a prison art therapy class.
We get back in the main room for the reception and there are no more chairs than before so we know were still standing for the meal....which is roast pig....sounds great. Problem is remember this is a tiny room, so in the midst of a wedding you have a little mexican dude working his arse off to shred this roast pig apart in the middle of it. So we lined up for our turn at the pig carcass, get ours ripped off and dropped on the plate and well...stand there...because no chairs.
At a certain point the bride proudly announced it's time to cut loose and turns up the music...but noone can fricking dance because the place is tiny and people are trying to find any place to put down their plate of ripped pig.
At least there was an open bar...kind of. They got 2 mini kegs of their fav beer that was free...everything else was cash. As SOON as those kegs ran out, word made it around the room and it cleared out with the quickness....
We went to our favorite bar where our bartender asked why the hell we were back from a wedding so early
ETA: this was downtown and since noone ever came to this stupid place there was no parking.... we parked before the shitshow across a traintrack and while it was going on they parked a train for the night....I had to climb onto, through and off a train in a suit to get to my car...don't ask me why I actually wore a suit to this shite
The bride and groom choose to have it at a really weird art gallery/shop type place..and by art I mean like barbie dolls in wooden boxes kinda shite. Anyway... we get to the "ceremony" part and there is literally maybe a dozen chairs for 50 or more people....so just about everyone was standing.
When the ceremony did start the bride walked down the aisle to an old man playing the french national anthem on the guitar which turned into random improv riffing...I guess... at one point it sounded like he had a stroke...or forgot how to play the thing cause he hit 4 wrong chords and the music just stopped...so she finished her walk in silence.... when at the alter the minister of course opened with "we are gathered here today to celebrate a little thing called life" a few people chuckled...most cringed.
The best part was this place was so tiny that they had to kick everyone out of the main room and say ok guys...ummm were gonna reset but come back in like 15-20 mins. So for 15 minutes we were all crammed in the weird arse art gallery.... passing the time by checking out weird paintings and shite that looked like it came from a prison art therapy class.
We get back in the main room for the reception and there are no more chairs than before so we know were still standing for the meal....which is roast pig....sounds great. Problem is remember this is a tiny room, so in the midst of a wedding you have a little mexican dude working his arse off to shred this roast pig apart in the middle of it. So we lined up for our turn at the pig carcass, get ours ripped off and dropped on the plate and well...stand there...because no chairs.
At a certain point the bride proudly announced it's time to cut loose and turns up the music...but noone can fricking dance because the place is tiny and people are trying to find any place to put down their plate of ripped pig.
At least there was an open bar...kind of. They got 2 mini kegs of their fav beer that was free...everything else was cash. As SOON as those kegs ran out, word made it around the room and it cleared out with the quickness....
We went to our favorite bar where our bartender asked why the hell we were back from a wedding so early
ETA: this was downtown and since noone ever came to this stupid place there was no parking.... we parked before the shitshow across a traintrack and while it was going on they parked a train for the night....I had to climb onto, through and off a train in a suit to get to my car...don't ask me why I actually wore a suit to this shite
This post was edited on 7/29/19 at 12:32 pm
1
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:46 am to TheFonz
quote:
Roll tide
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:49 am to VolsOut4Harambe
The only bad weddings I've been to are the handful of so dry ones I've been to.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:49 am to BrohemAlem11
quote:
scott8811
Jesus Christ
I would leave after they kicked you out of the little room the first time. Make up some excuse like you got the squirts or something like that.Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:53 am to VolsOut4Harambe
Back in college, dated a girl whose mother's side the family was from Cincinnati. Her cousin got married and we went up. Their reception had beer and sandwiches, with white sliced bread and cold cuts, and potato chips...
Another was for my wife's friend, got married on the beach in Ft Walton and the reception was at a place down the beach. They were west bankers and their westbank DJ starts playing a bunch of rap with frick as every other word and pussy as every other word if front of their own kids.. They were all dancing to it like it was normal...
My wife and I were there with our 7 y/o's... we left early.. along with a bunch of others who had kids...
Another was for my wife's friend, got married on the beach in Ft Walton and the reception was at a place down the beach. They were west bankers and their westbank DJ starts playing a bunch of rap with frick as every other word and pussy as every other word if front of their own kids.. They were all dancing to it like it was normal...
My wife and I were there with our 7 y/o's... we left early..
along with a bunch of others who had kids...This post was edited on 7/29/19 at 11:30 am
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:53 am to VolsOut4Harambe
I actually hate when they bring the college mascot out there
Posted on 7/29/19 at 10:53 am to VolsOut4Harambe
we were close to leaving at one point....then they finally called us back in. It was terrible during it, but we were dying laughing at the bar afterwards
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:03 am to whit
quote:
“grandpa joe, you know you my ni##a right?!”
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:06 am to whit
quote:
During a speech he was giving he said referring to the brides grandfather, “grandpa joe, you know you my ni##a right?!” I cringed hard.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:07 am to BrohemAlem11
quote:
It was terrible during it, but we were dying laughing at the bar afterwards
See, this right here is why I kind of hope every wedding I get dragged to is a shite show. Now, the really great weddings are obviously the best, but if I’m going to burn a Saturday, I’d rather at least have a good story to tell than some boring finger food party.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:18 am to The Spleen
While the wedding was nice, I was in a wedding once where one of the bridesmaids, who was married at the time, slept with a guy the night before the wedding, and a different guy the night of the wedding. Her husband went back to the hotel room both nights to put the kids to bed.
They're obviously divorced now and she's on her 2nd husband since then, 3rd total.
They're obviously divorced now and she's on her 2nd husband since then, 3rd total.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:22 am to TheFonz
Please tell me this is staged. good lord.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:27 am to VolsOut4Harambe
Went to a wedding once at small rural church. The bride was so drunk she had to be helped down the aisle. Their dog was the ring bearer. The toasts at the reception were done with plastic cups from a beer ball.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:27 am to prostyleoffensetime
Thats pretty trashy to do it outside in July anywhere. unless its like 60 outside.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:28 am to VolsOut4Harambe
Would a Monday holiday wedding (like labor day, veterans day) be better or worse than an LSU Saturday or Saints Sunday wedding?
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:30 am to 13SaintTiger
quote:
Yea, definitely your first wedding. Congrats on talking shite about your only friend.
Most weddings I've been to that were out of town and the majority of people were traveling there the wedding party provided some sort of shuttle service.
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:31 am to VolsOut4Harambe
My brothers. shite was on a Wednesday and he didn’t call to tell me about it until Sunday. They were still setting up for the damn thing when guests were arriving. Some big arse redneck was bear hugging tree stumps into this small arse church when I showed up.
90% of the guests were in blue jeans and t-shirts/polos
90% of the guests were in blue jeans and t-shirts/polos
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:31 am to Monday
quote:
but I'm getting weary of the growing trend of asking guests to move tables and chairs for the reception and picking them up at the end.
Where's this a "growing trend"?
Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:35 am to VolsOut4Harambe
My mom dragged me to the wedding of some older trashy lady she worked with. It was at their house in the backyard. The lady wanted me to do her makeup, but her sister kept interfering to "help" me, and she was totally naked. I was like 18 at the time so the sight of a nude 50 year old woman freaked me out. I let her do the makeup.
During the ceremony, the people standing in the back instead of sitting in chairs were all chain smoking.
The event was pot luck and she asked us to bring tuna fish.. like tuna salad with mayo and shite The refreshments were various versions of Franzia.
During the ceremony, the people standing in the back instead of sitting in chairs were all chain smoking.
The event was pot luck and she asked us to bring tuna fish.. like tuna salad with mayo and shite
The refreshments were various versions of Franzia.Posted on 7/29/19 at 11:37 am to Y.A. Tittle
quote:
Where's this a "growing trend"?
Not sure it is a growing trend but I have seen it also, my cousins wedding.
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