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Started By
Message
re: Problem with the in-laws
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:36 am to Red5LSU
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:36 am to Red5LSU
This is an issue between sisters. She's using you as an excuse to rule over her sister and there is probably something else wedding related the SIL is upset about. Tell your fiancée to stand up for you now because this will happen again. I personally would tell her not to be involved in the wedding if that's what she wants. I would also say it to her face if I was your fiancée, not text. Texting is for the weak in confrontation.
My side of the family is like this, and my SO knows I stand up every chance I get. Just remember your relationship is number one and back each other up. Her family will still love her and be involved.
The handshake...
I do think it is polite for a thank you when someone has you in their home. Just say a simple thank you for having us next time.
Lastly, dealing with pettiness your whole life is tough, your fiancée is a stronger person than you realize.
My side of the family is like this, and my SO knows I stand up every chance I get. Just remember your relationship is number one and back each other up. Her family will still love her and be involved.
The handshake...
I do think it is polite for a thank you when someone has you in their home. Just say a simple thank you for having us next time.
Lastly, dealing with pettiness your whole life is tough, your fiancée is a stronger person than you realize.
0
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:37 am to Displaced
Why, embrace of course. What, you think I'm a bigot?
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:37 am to Displaced
quote:
So you embrace all those things or you reject all those things?
Why...just why?
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:38 am to 50_Tiger
I was asked a question and I responded.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:39 am to Collegedropout
quote:
I was asked a question and I responded.
You've derailed the OP / thread for 4 pages. Make your own thread on your crazy fricking ideology.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:39 am to Collegedropout
quote:
Egalitarianism
Feminism
Atheism
Abortion
Homosexuality
Rock n Roll that promotes sex outside of wedlock and drugs
Drugs
Sex outside of wedlock
Rejecting having lots of kids so you can save some extra shekels
Not having any kids at all so you can save your shekels for yourself
I can keep going
Told y'all he was a troll
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:41 am to Collegedropout
quote:
Why, embrace of course. What, you think I'm a bigot
quote:
Maybe not all of these things are bad in limited doses, but they have all helped ruined the culture of not only the west but the whole world.
You can see why I might be confused...
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:42 am to 50_Tiger
Meh, I think I'm responsible for derailing this one.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:42 am to Red5LSU
Labeling yourself an introvert is not an excuse to be rude. My gosh, you're a man. Shake the man's hand and don't act like you don't want to be there, which is what you did.
These folks have a new baby. They're excited. It's pretty normal to want your sister to see your baby. Did you even congratulate them or comment at all on the baby?
I'm not so sure your problem is so much being an introvert as it is being all about me. There are lots of "I's" in that long paragraph you wrote.
Your fiancee shouldn't apologize for your actions. YOU should. You need to make this right or your little "I was tired and wanted to go home" act is going to haunt you and your fiance until death do your SIL part. It's pretty hard to get over your wife's sister not being in your wedding even if y'all come to terms later on. It will never be forgotten.
Learn some manners. Even introverts have manners.
These folks have a new baby. They're excited. It's pretty normal to want your sister to see your baby. Did you even congratulate them or comment at all on the baby?
I'm not so sure your problem is so much being an introvert as it is being all about me. There are lots of "I's" in that long paragraph you wrote.
Your fiancee shouldn't apologize for your actions. YOU should. You need to make this right or your little "I was tired and wanted to go home" act is going to haunt you and your fiance until death do your SIL part. It's pretty hard to get over your wife's sister not being in your wedding even if y'all come to terms later on. It will never be forgotten.
Learn some manners. Even introverts have manners.
This post was edited on 8/2/17 at 9:49 am
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:43 am to Red5LSU
I'm still hung up on
Versus
She ain't your sister in law yet.
quote:
Sister in law
Versus
quote:
Fiancé
She ain't your sister in law yet.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:44 am to Gris Gris
quote:
Labeling yourself an introvert is not an excuse to be rude. My gosh, you're a man. Shake the man's hand and don't act like you don't want to be there, which is what you did.
These folks have a new baby. They're excited. It's pretty normal to want your sister to see your baby. Did you even congratulate them or comment at all on the baby.
I'm not so sure your problem is so much being an introvert as it is being all about me. There are lots of "I's" in that long paragraph you wrote.
Your fiancee shouldn't apologize for your actions. YOU should. You need to make this right or your little "I was tired and wanted to go home" act is going to haunt you and your fiance until death do your SIL part. It's pretty hard to get over your wife's sister not being in your wedding even if y'all come to terms later on. It will never be forgotten.
Learn some manners. Even introverts have manners.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:48 am to Red5LSU
quote:
my sister-in-law to be hates me
First things first. Don't be surprised if she needles her way into your wife's head and turns her against you. Just sayin.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 9:50 am to Collegedropout
quote:
Egalitarianism
Feminism
Atheism
Abortion
Homosexuality
Rock n Roll that promotes sex outside of wedlock and drugs
Drugs
Sex outside of wedlock
Rejecting having lots of kids so you can save some extra shekels
Not having any kids at all so you can save your shekels for yourself
I'm in favor of all of these. We should get an apartment together and let hilarity ensue.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:01 am to Displaced
I was being sarcastic. I do not embrace any of those things. Some of the things I listed may be fine in limited doses
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:02 am to Red5LSU
frick all these people telling you to be more social, and calling you an a-hole. Stupid shite like "learn to be more social", WTF does that even mean? That's not who you are. And small talk, frick that shite too. And I love how the onus is all on you for this bullshite. It's one thing if they're talking to you and you're ignoring them, ok that's rude, but why is it your responsibility to talk or strike up a conversation? Being quiet is not disrespectful. The hand shaking thing, IDK, unless you went out of your way to not shake his hand or to ignore him when walking in, this sounds sounds like a power play by the C U N T sister.
Being polite & respectful does not include striking up a conversation and small talk just to satisfy someone else's need for attention or their fricked up craving for what they deem to be respectful. A simple hello or other form of greeting will suffice. Some people just aren't as social as others. And for the people saying suck it up and learn to talk more and be more social, why is the opposite of that not viable? Shut the frick up for a change, and stop being offended that someone doesn't entertain your need for unnecessary talking.
Being polite & respectful does not include striking up a conversation and small talk just to satisfy someone else's need for attention or their fricked up craving for what they deem to be respectful. A simple hello or other form of greeting will suffice. Some people just aren't as social as others. And for the people saying suck it up and learn to talk more and be more social, why is the opposite of that not viable? Shut the frick up for a change, and stop being offended that someone doesn't entertain your need for unnecessary talking.
This post was edited on 8/3/17 at 2:21 am
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:03 am to Collegedropout
You reject people only having the number of kids they can afford?
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:03 am to Red5LSU
quote:
The next day, my fiancee gets a text from her sister saying it was disrespectful that I didn't talk that much to her and her husband and that I didn't shake her husband's hand when I entered the house.
What a disrespectful little bitch.. if anyone walked into my house and didn't have enough respect to acknowledge me, they can GTF. How are you too socially retarded to see this?
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:09 am to Red5LSU
Based on your story, you probably could have done a better job, and while I'm not sure an apology is warranted, it would smooth things over.
But...
The OP needs to man up and socialize a bit, but the SIL needs to relax and stop making a huge deal out of something terribly minor.
But...
quote:I draw the line there, demanding an apology. I'm pretty stubborn and that text alone would get me to not apologize unless I did something totally egregious, which the OP didn't.
She also stated that my fiancee should apologize for my actions and if she didn't, my sister-in-law to be wouldn't take part in our wedding.
The OP needs to man up and socialize a bit, but the SIL needs to relax and stop making a huge deal out of something terribly minor.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:10 am to Displaced
If by number they can afford, you mean after the car payments, brand new house, brand new furniture, vacations, etc, then yes, absolutely.
Posted on 8/2/17 at 10:10 am to Red5LSU
quote:
But to do it every time I see them, especially after knowing them for 2.5 years, just seems redundant. Why did it take so long for her to mention she had a problem with it?
Dude, what kind of awkward, beta bitch are you? I've been with my fiancé for 8 years, see her family all the time, and STILL shake their hands everytime I see them.. dad, uncles, paw paw, cousins, etc... it's called respect and being personable.. shite, I'm only 30, but have a little old school in me, so I take my hat off inside the inlaws house... never even realized I did it still until the FIL mentioned it. He appreciates the respect I show him
Nobody wants to be around the uncomfortable douche who doesn't know how to act like a man
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