re: Nsfw: the most embarrassing sexual thing you've done

Should have had pastalaya instead

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TigerTalker16

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If you never had your grandma in your car when it reeked like weed I don’t trust you

I'm not reading all these pages.

When I was 14 or 15 my girlfriend was 12 or 13. We took each others virginity's at 12 for her/14 for me.

I pulled a turd out of her arse. I had my thumb in her cooter and my index index in her a-hole. Felt something that felt like a smooth round marble. I had no shite stains on my finger. I pulled it out and it was a little ball of shite, like a rabbit turd.

ETA: It's not really embarrassing. More funny than anything.

Where’s your story?

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You are missed, bro

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Unfortunately, I have to work during the day now.

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Yes but it doesn’t mean I would eat my own arse.
Wtf is wrong with you people?

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I believe his post was tongue in cheek

Went out on a double date with my GF, my buddy, and his GF.

We all got super wasted and decided to crash at his GFs place close by.

I woke up the next morning at like 7am with my buddy's GF in my arms in her bed and she is telling me how it was the best sex she ever had, and she couldn't believe the things we did, and she had no idea sex could be like that.

I hurry and get dressed and find my buddy passed out on the floor in the bathroom and my GF is out on the sofa. I wake her up and we leave.

Two days later my friends girl dumps him and spends the next few months pursuing me, but I'm not interested in her. Never was.

To this day my friend doesn't understand why she dumped him and looks like a kid that lost his puppy if her names comes up.

I saw the chick recently and she looked at me like she was ready for us to go at it again right then and there.

She says it was the best night of sex in her life.

I remember absolutely none of it. Not seeing her naked, not kissing her, touching her, not getting in her bed, none of it.

Some friend you are

I hooked up with a fat chick on her waterbed back when I was around 20. That was a really tough challenge in it's own with toooo much wave action happening. It's hard to get foot gription on one of those things, and you need some leverage to pump a big girl. Anyway mid-way, old girl started sucking my tongue. It was weird, but I let it go a little. Then she really started getting into it, sucking so hard it was starting to draw blood. I kept pumping, but at the the same time I had my hands on her forehead and shoulders trying to get this bitch off my tongue. She wasn't having it, and it was starting to hurt. I was totally going limp by this time, so the only thing I could think to do was jab her straight in the tit with my first 2 fingers. She immediately let go and yelled out "OW! Why did you do that!" I was like my bad, and tried to continue, but it was like jamming silly putty into a wet wall. I made up a story that I popped some pain pills before I came over and it was affecting my little guy, grabbed my shite and got out of there. No more fat girls on waterbeds for me.