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Started By
Message
re: Marital Advice
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:49 pm to thelawnwranglers
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:49 pm to thelawnwranglers
coke and hookers evening will bring you great serenity, young grasshoppa.
0
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:50 pm to Benne Wafer
quote:
Not that there aren't other issues at play but can you honestly say you haven't been a bit of an a-hole because of work stress?
I am not pulling my weight at home. If my job doesn't work out we lose 76% of our income. I need to let go of people and I don't want to. I might have reached my level of incompetence.
So good point I am probably bringing that home
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:55 pm to thelawnwranglers
when you say hoarder
a)
b)
c)
d)
hoard one item like OCD, hoard to the ceiling? or just pack rat and keep everything in your attic/basement?
a)
b)
c)
d)
hoard one item like OCD, hoard to the ceiling? or just pack rat and keep everything in your attic/basement?
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:55 pm to Blizzard of Chizz
quote:
If this shite means so much to your wife and MIL, they can rent a storage unit and keep it there.
I do not believe that the wife and MIL work. They cannot afford to rent a storage unit. If you have no income, you cannot rent things.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:55 pm to tiger91
Toxic in-laws can put huge strain on a marriage,I know from experience.Sounds like the wife has a co-dependent relationship with her mother,typically these situations don’t get any better.Dudes between a rock and a hard place.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:56 pm to cajunangelle
Clean hoard packed in bins etc
And not full blown yet
And not full blown yet
Posted on 2/16/20 at 3:58 pm to Hangit
quote:
do not believe that the wife and MIL work. They cannot afford to rent a storage unit. If you have no income, you cannot rent things.
Mother in law is new money but never lost that lower middle class feeling. So almost unlimited resources but mostly smart with it.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:00 pm to thelawnwranglers
shite
My grandmother is a bonafide hoarder and always gives us shite despite having been asked not to. These days we just take it, make sure it's not filthy, and donate it. If it's filthy but salvageable we clean it up and donate it. If it's ruined.. trash can.
This is just something that can easily be fixed if you're willing to work together.
My grandmother is a bonafide hoarder and always gives us shite despite having been asked not to. These days we just take it, make sure it's not filthy, and donate it. If it's filthy but salvageable we clean it up and donate it. If it's ruined.. trash can.
This is just something that can easily be fixed if you're willing to work together.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:01 pm to thelawnwranglers
so why not have a huge garage sale for MIL?
put on some big boy pants. firing people is part of life. when I first had to do it I was horrified and empathetic. Then the female I was firing said okay, and left she could have cared less.
put on some big boy pants. firing people is part of life. when I first had to do it I was horrified and empathetic. Then the female I was firing said okay, and left she could have cared less.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:05 pm to cajunangelle
quote:
and left she could have cared less.
So she actually cared?
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:07 pm to cajunangelle
I’m thinking the MIL may have some hoarding issues, and is currently placing an emotional value on every object in her home, due to the loss of her husband (if I read correctly).
Sounds like your wife and her mom need some therapy to get over these issues. Is your wife at least aware of the fact that she is a hoarder?
Sounds like your wife and her mom need some therapy to get over these issues. Is your wife at least aware of the fact that she is a hoarder?
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:10 pm to CoCo311
quote:
I’m thinking the MIL may have some hoarding issues, and is currently placing an emotional value on every object in her home, due to the loss of her husband (if I read correctly).
Yep - last place she was with husband
We find stuff she bought on sale and it is always I was going to give that someone
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:14 pm to thelawnwranglers
quote:
10 years ago 2008 we are early 30s over extend in a house to be close to her mom in the Northeast and we both get laid off.
Fast forward we have recovered but too old for our own or adopted
Had my daughter at 38 and my son at 47 (wife was 40)
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:15 pm to Hulkklogan
quote:
These days we just take it, make sure it's not filthy, and donate it. If
How is he gonna donate it if his wife is not onboard with it? She already refuses to compromise on getting a storage unit. Can’t see her going along with that..Bottom line is this, until wife and MIL are willing to compromise and either sell shite or place it in storage, the OP should not give up another inch of room in his house for her stuff. He already sacrificed his finished basement so the ball is in their court now.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:17 pm to thelawnwranglers
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:18 pm to thelawnwranglers
Go get the hotel. Sounds like she’s emotionally abusing you, intentionally or not, and you need some time away.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:19 pm to Blizzard of Chizz
quote:
This is just something that can easily be fixed if you're willing to work together.
Good marriages require working together and parties must compromise (not saying he hasn't already - quite the opposite)
In my case, as an example, I had to tell my grandmother that we would not be bringing our child into her house because it's not safe. That was a brutal experience but you gotta do what you gotta do for your family.
OPs wife needs to tell her mom what's what regardless of how it's going to make her feel.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:20 pm to thelawnwranglers
I travel for business. If I ever stop, I’ll make up a fake business trip. Have to get away every now and then for at least a night.
Cheap hotel for $50 will be like an oasis for you.
Cheap hotel for $50 will be like an oasis for you.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:23 pm to thelawnwranglers
quote:
We are going to hoarder this place and be miserable.
Saw a truck that said "College Hunks Hauling Junk" the other day.
Hadn't heard of them, but it does seem like they could solve both your problem and your wife's.
Posted on 2/16/20 at 4:26 pm to thelawnwranglers
quote:
thelawnwranglers
Make it worthwhile since you will automatically be accused of cheating. IRL 8 should suffice.
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