re: How much time is appropriate to wait to start dating again after a spouse dies?

A friend of mine lost his wife. I knew both of them very well, and they were very much in love, as much in love after 30 years as any couple I know.

I told him life was for the living.

He took up with an old girlfriend fresh out of a divorce fairly quickly. She was company, someone he could help take care of, and I think that was good for him, but even though she wanted to, there was no way he was marrying her.

There was only one love for him, and that love was gone.

My grandparents were happily married for 45 years before my grandmother died of cancer. Within 2 months he met a woman whose husband had died a few years earlier. They hit it off and were married 3 months later. Neither of them were looking for another relationship but they were ecstatically happy for the 12 years they had together. Who would want to deprive anyone of happiness like that?

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There was only one love for him, and that love was gone.

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My Grandmother never dated anyone else after my Grandfather died in ‘97. And she says she doesn’t regret that but she also will be the first to tell you how lonely it is to be without someone for that long. My Mom passed 6 years ago and one of the things I told my Dad is if he wanted to see someone he’d have my blessing. He’s a grown arse man and cognizant enough to make that decision for himself.

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How would waiting’s year deprive them of happiness?

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You still haven’t told us why you’ve picked this arbitrary timeframe of a year.

Ask Tom Massie. He knows everything.

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Several people in my wife’s family really thought that was inappropriate.

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So what you’re saying is you thought it was inappropriate?

No right or wrong answer here. It might be strange or appear disrespectful. But in all likelihood If they were married 30 years. The one passed probably made the other one promise to get back out there and find someone and not spend their life alone.

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It might be strange or appear disrespectful

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lol it’s her life. She can do whatever (and whomever) she wants.

People who secretly judge from the sidelines are Karens

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ad hominem attacks

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I refer to this woman that you don’t even know as a whore

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Keep making it this easy.

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And again, for all you know this woman is literally a whore who gets paid to have sex.

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Well you said you know her. Is she? This is the second time in this thread you’ve brought up a woman getting paid for sex (after your OnlyFans comment). That seems awfully specific.

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Are you one of these ladies that thinks that a man should never call a woman a whore under any circumstance?

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I think there’s a time and place and from what you’ve described of this woman she doesn’t appear to warrant the slander.