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re: Has it ever occurred to you that you have been programmed to be unhappy?
Posted on 1/8/21 at 11:31 am to genuineLSUtiger
Posted on 1/8/21 at 11:31 am to genuineLSUtiger
We all have competing and conflicting programming. Thinking otherwise is naive and foolish. Natural programming patterns include: program your kids optimally, refactor your own routines and hack and combat systems you hate.
Marketing can easily be understood as mass programming to assert that audience needs a thing; with the promise that the suffering will end when you buy my product!
Therefore, most advertisement and other communications can be condensed down into a form of a combo of:
* adds unhappiness of with current state (with blame focused on the audience)
* offers hope in exchange for money or support
Marketing can easily be understood as mass programming to assert that audience needs a thing; with the promise that the suffering will end when you buy my product!
Therefore, most advertisement and other communications can be condensed down into a form of a combo of:
* adds unhappiness of with current state (with blame focused on the audience)
* offers hope in exchange for money or support
0
Posted on 1/8/21 at 11:58 am to Delacroix22
quote:same thing, but the way I say it.
Delacroix22
We live in an intergenerational dysfunctional society, that promotes stress and ignoring our emotions. We are sold things to cope with our emotions, instead of be mindful. We use food, media, workaholism, alcohol, drugs, anything that can distract us from what we’re feeling. Even positive things like exercise, and recreation can be deleterious in other parts of our lives. These coping mechanisms almost work, almost fill the need that we have. But they always fall short, and this is why they are addictive, and addiction is so high today. The need that we are trying to fill is human connection, but scrolling on our phones is so much easier that actually making decisions that support our core values.
Key to contentment is aligning your decisions with your core values. To do that we must be mindful of what our core values are, and if our decisions we make will bring us closer or further away to those values. If we have not defined our core values we are just winging it, and will eventually reach a tipping point. If we are not mindful it’s easy to get persuaded of what our values are.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:04 pm to S
quote:
Dewey Decimal System..what a scam that was
Love a good obscure seinfeld quote
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:06 pm to genuineLSUtiger
I coined the term “depresso-capitalism” to describe it.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:07 pm to Rust Cohle
quote:
. If we are not mindful it’s easy to get persuaded of what our values are.
Values evolve though. Contentment is acceptance, and a lack of attachment. Happiness is fleeting, peace is permanent.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:15 pm to RogerTheShrubber
I think some big factors are the loss of
1. Trust in institutions
2. Loss of traditional community pillars like churches and neighborhood schools
3. Lack of reward for commitment and incentives for a lack of commitment
4. Government entitlements, the war on drugs, and easy divorce destroying the traditional nuclear family
5. The move from single income homes to dual income homes in order to support a “middle class” standard of living
6. Feminism indoctrinating women to fear or frown upon many activities and lifestyles that tend to bring greater overall satisfaction while encouraging behaviors and lifestyles more likely to lead to a long term lack of fulfillment
7. Use of prescription drugs at early ages to treat behavioral issues in schools caused by unrealistic expectations, schedules, and environments that are not really designed for the well-being of children.
1. Trust in institutions
2. Loss of traditional community pillars like churches and neighborhood schools
3. Lack of reward for commitment and incentives for a lack of commitment
4. Government entitlements, the war on drugs, and easy divorce destroying the traditional nuclear family
5. The move from single income homes to dual income homes in order to support a “middle class” standard of living
6. Feminism indoctrinating women to fear or frown upon many activities and lifestyles that tend to bring greater overall satisfaction while encouraging behaviors and lifestyles more likely to lead to a long term lack of fulfillment
7. Use of prescription drugs at early ages to treat behavioral issues in schools caused by unrealistic expectations, schedules, and environments that are not really designed for the well-being of children.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:19 pm to genuineLSUtiger
This is basically the foundation of Buddhism. Life is suffering and the origin of that suffering is desire. You can lessen and eventually eliminate your suffering by getting rid of desire.
It's a little more nuanced than that, but that's the basic idea of the Four Noble Truths.
It's a little more nuanced than that, but that's the basic idea of the Four Noble Truths.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:23 pm to Rust Cohle
quote:
same thing, but the way I say it.
We live in an intergenerational dysfunctional society, that promotes stress and ignoring our emotions. We are sold things to cope with our emotions, instead of be mindful. We use food, media, workaholism, alcohol, drugs, anything that can distract us from what we’re feeling. Even positive things like exercise, and recreation can be deleterious in other parts of our lives. These coping mechanisms almost work, almost fill the need that we have. But they always fall short, and this is why they are addictive, and addiction is so high today. The need that we are trying to fill is human connection, but scrolling on our phones is so much easier that actually making decisions that support our core values.
Key to contentment is aligning your decisions with your core values. To do that we must be mindful of what our core values are, and if our decisions we make will bring us closer or further away to those values. If we have not defined our core values we are just winging it, and will eventually reach a tipping point. If we are not mindful it’s easy to get persuaded of what our values are.
This is extremely well said. I'd add that you point out the lack of socialization due to social media etc. The pandemic is social media on steroids. It's forced our routines into isolated little pockets even more than they already were.
I'm fairly confident that there is a war on mental and emotional health being waged right now. People are struggling. No one is talking. It's vicious.
People need to appreciate the things going right atm. Don't take for granted the potentially positive relationships they could have in their lives. Those that love them. Make it your damn mission to love back. Cause right now, everyone could use the positivity and love.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 12:57 pm to genuineLSUtiger
Is consumerism really to blame?
I mean, people that can't get enough food to eat are miserable. People that are kept captive and forced into labor are miserable.
Maybe people are just never happy with whatever they've got, no matter what "they got" is.
I mean, people that can't get enough food to eat are miserable. People that are kept captive and forced into labor are miserable.
Maybe people are just never happy with whatever they've got, no matter what "they got" is.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 1:07 pm to concrete_tiger
Consumerism is a symptom of a larger problem, imo. People crave fulfillment in an unfulfilling world, and turn to consumerism to fill a void consumption can never fill.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 2:00 pm to genuineLSUtiger
For whatever reason, I think humans are naturally jealous creatures. Holding on to that feeling of jealously will almost always lead to unhappiness. I've noticed that a lot of people that you're on friendly terms with want you to succeed as long as you're not doing better than they are.
Now with social media and the internet, people are more aware than ever of just how many people are doing better than they are. Or at least appear to be. Many don't consider you're basically just seeing all the highlights in these people's lives rather than the full picture.
I definitely have to remind myself of this from time to time to kind of reset my perspective. Sure it would be great to be more successful, better looking, smarter, etc. That's not to say wanting any of that is wrong, but it still won't make you happy long term. You'll eventually adjust and end up wanting even more.
Sometimes it's helped me to just think about all the people out there who are in really poor health or can't make ends meet despite doing their best and realize just how good I really have it.
Now with social media and the internet, people are more aware than ever of just how many people are doing better than they are. Or at least appear to be. Many don't consider you're basically just seeing all the highlights in these people's lives rather than the full picture.
I definitely have to remind myself of this from time to time to kind of reset my perspective. Sure it would be great to be more successful, better looking, smarter, etc. That's not to say wanting any of that is wrong, but it still won't make you happy long term. You'll eventually adjust and end up wanting even more.
Sometimes it's helped me to just think about all the people out there who are in really poor health or can't make ends meet despite doing their best and realize just how good I really have it.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 2:07 pm to kingbob
quote:
Consumerism is a symptom of a larger problem, imo. People crave fulfillment in an unfulfilling world, and turn to consumerism to fill a void consumption can never fill.
I think consumerism is a result of people losing their primal, natural desires due to relative success in an easier environment. Most of us are wired for competition, violence (in a protective manner) and some level of survival.
When man passes the survival level, he/she gets soft and settles down to a world of consumerism instead of advancing upward toward self actualization.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 2:13 pm to HippieTiger
quote:It’s not the end, it just means a lot of people are going to be working to give more of their hard earned money to the government. It also means the cost of living is going to sky rocket, and unemployment is going to continue at an insane rate for a long time.
Orange man lost is not the end
Posted on 1/8/21 at 3:40 pm to RogerTheShrubber
I think the disconnect is somewhere along the hierarchy of needs.
You have your base physiological needs, then your safety/security needs, then belonging and love, then esteem, then self-actualization.
Most everyone in our society has, more or less, the first two levels covered. However, our society champions esteem as the most important thing next rather than a biproduct of things like achievement, belonging, intimacy, etc. So, everyone is chasing esteem rather than the things that naturally lead to esteem, being told that esteem is the requirement to have those other things rather than the other way around.
I can’t tell you how many times I have heard from people that before you can find a happy romantic relationship you have to already be happy with yourself. However, self-esteem is higher up the pyramid of needs from belonging and love. Meaning that you cannot get esteem while feeling a lack of belonging, thus you cannot will yourself to have high esteem in order to get that belonging.
Our society isolates us and eliminated many of the pillars that used to bring people a sense of belonging, instead diverting us to chase endlessly after esteem which cannot be found without love and belonging.
I believe that may be the disconnect. People are chasing esteem and prestige, when they lack belonging, through materialist consumption and a lifestyle of “keeping up with the Joneses.”.
You have your base physiological needs, then your safety/security needs, then belonging and love, then esteem, then self-actualization.
Most everyone in our society has, more or less, the first two levels covered. However, our society champions esteem as the most important thing next rather than a biproduct of things like achievement, belonging, intimacy, etc. So, everyone is chasing esteem rather than the things that naturally lead to esteem, being told that esteem is the requirement to have those other things rather than the other way around.
I can’t tell you how many times I have heard from people that before you can find a happy romantic relationship you have to already be happy with yourself. However, self-esteem is higher up the pyramid of needs from belonging and love. Meaning that you cannot get esteem while feeling a lack of belonging, thus you cannot will yourself to have high esteem in order to get that belonging.
Our society isolates us and eliminated many of the pillars that used to bring people a sense of belonging, instead diverting us to chase endlessly after esteem which cannot be found without love and belonging.
I believe that may be the disconnect. People are chasing esteem and prestige, when they lack belonging, through materialist consumption and a lifestyle of “keeping up with the Joneses.”.
This post was edited on 1/8/21 at 3:41 pm
Posted on 1/8/21 at 3:47 pm to genuineLSUtiger
Joy does not simply happen to us. We have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day.
- Henri Nouwen
- Henri Nouwen
Posted on 1/8/21 at 4:00 pm to genuineLSUtiger
I believe social media is doing that
Posted on 1/8/21 at 4:01 pm to genuineLSUtiger
quote:.
Has it ever occurred to you that you have been programmed to be unhappy?
I feel genuinely sorry for y'all. I'm programmed to be happy I suppose. And for that I'm grateful.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 4:04 pm to Centinel
quote:
I like turtles.
Posted on 1/8/21 at 5:05 pm to kingbob
A lot of people are hitting the nail on the head here. No need for me to repeat.
I find that when things get tense, I revert back to what has always made me happy. It’s when those things get turned upside down that my world is truly out of whack. I love my wife. I love traveling. I love sports. Those are my go-tos. Right now, one of those isn’t very accessible, and surprisingly it isn’t the wife
I find that when things get tense, I revert back to what has always made me happy. It’s when those things get turned upside down that my world is truly out of whack. I love my wife. I love traveling. I love sports. Those are my go-tos. Right now, one of those isn’t very accessible, and surprisingly it isn’t the wife
Posted on 1/8/21 at 5:36 pm to genuineLSUtiger
quote:
Has it ever occurred to you that you have been programmed to be unhappy?
I've rejected my programming then because I'm a pretty happy go lucky dude about 98.5% of the time. I have a little bit of a realist, cynical edge to me, but life is too short to be pissed off all the time.
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