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re: Do you allow your kids to have screens in their rooms?
Posted on 3/16/25 at 10:49 pm to pelicanpride
Posted on 3/16/25 at 10:49 pm to pelicanpride
My son is 10 and no screens in the bedroom and especially overnight. His mom argues with me about it all the time but those are the rules in my house.
1
Posted on 3/16/25 at 10:54 pm to pelicanpride
My 13 yo daughter doesn't have one. A couple years back she asked a few times, but stopped asking a year ago.
Solely because she's noticed how lame some of her classmates get with their phones. Instead of laughing and joking around they text each other from 3 feet away. So when a friend comes over they might use it to put on Spotify, but that's about it. The one time her friends FaceTimed their boyfriend it started a fight, so she doesn't think she's missing much.
Solely because she's noticed how lame some of her classmates get with their phones. Instead of laughing and joking around they text each other from 3 feet away. So when a friend comes over they might use it to put on Spotify, but that's about it. The one time her friends FaceTimed their boyfriend it started a fight, so she doesn't think she's missing much.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:02 pm to When in Rome
quote:
Handing them a device that feeds them a steady stream of dopamine while inhibiting their original creativity is doing them a disservice in the long run.
That’s my whole thing and what my kid doesn’t get. He just watches baseball and hunting videos on YouTube. What’s so bad about that? I keep trying to tell him that it’s not the content so much as that the content is being served to him by an algorithm that has no other motivation than to keep him clicking. I’m not bothered by what he’s watching. I’m bothered by what he could have done IRL with those hours instead.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:08 pm to pelicanpride
I can’t put my finger on why, but I think the handheld devices are WAY worse than the TV. We just have the one TV in the middle of the living room and nothing but books and toys in the bedrooms. I guess because the TV is stationary, it’s harder to get sucked into it completely. I think iPads in particular are super damaging to kids and adults alike. Their existence bothers me. I want to ditch my smart phone too. Like most people I can’t put it down for long, and that bothers me.
This post was edited on 3/16/25 at 11:10 pm
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:21 pm to When in Rome
quote:
I can’t put my finger on why, but I think the handheld devices are WAY worse than the TV.
I think it’s 2 things. The handheld devices are by design solitary. Very different from a TV that everyone in the same room watches.
More importantly, TV simply can’t offer up the amount of content specifically designed for your interests. The algorithms learn through trial and error what will keep you clicking. Not what will make you happy, what will keep you clicking. These apps and devices have hacked the human brain in a way that TV never could. It’s too much for most kids.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:21 pm to pelicanpride
You know there are apps and different programs you can use to block things you don’t want them to see?
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:23 pm to When in Rome
quote:
Like most people I can’t put it down for long, and that bothers me.
I’m sure you’ve tried this, but turning off notifications for all but the most essential apps will have an immediate positive impact.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:24 pm to pelicanpride
I have everything muted, doesn't make a difference. The pull is real 
This post was edited on 3/17/25 at 7:15 am
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:26 pm to Sofaking2
quote:
You know there are apps and different programs you can use to block things you don’t want them to see?
Already use parental controls. My understanding is that they aren’t great for most devices. Managing things at the router level is really the only effective way to know what comes into your home. Not allowing devices in the bedroom is a low tech option.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:42 pm to billjamin
quote:
My son is 10 and no screens in the bedroom and especially overnight. His mom argues with me about it all the time but those are the rules in my house.
Tell her that you are worried he’s going start watching some really graphic porn here in a couple of years and that it’s going to warp his view of sex and women. Might f him up so much that he can’t get a boner with a real woman. I’m the mom, and porn is the primary reason I didn’t want phones in my son’s’ room. My husband wasn’t overly concerned about that. He just didn’t like him disappearing all day to his room. Just trying to give you an argument that might work from a mom perspective.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:42 pm to pelicanpride
When you're ready for your child's childhood to end, get them a phone.
Up to you.
Up to you.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:45 pm to pelicanpride
I had a TV in my room along with an SNES. There were no issues because my parents weren't complete Nazi assholes who thought I had to be raised exactly how they were even though they complained about how terrible their parents were.
Posted on 3/16/25 at 11:51 pm to pelicanpride
quote:
I’m the mom, and porn is the primary reason I didn’t want phones in my son’s’ room
And you’re doing a great job understanding the damaging effects pornography can have on people especially at young ages.
Keep the phones out of the room. No smart phones until they’re driving (maybe). I highly recommend The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and Of Boys and Men by Richard Reeves.
Posted on 3/17/25 at 12:01 am to dcrews
quote:
I had a TV in my room along with an SNES. There were no issues because my parents weren't complete Nazi assholes who thought I had to be raised exactly how they were even though they complained about how terrible their parents were.
SNES used to force kids to be in the same room to play together. Current game consoles incentivize them to be apart. I guess just one more way that I’m a Nazi is that I don’t allow my 10-year-old son, who loves video games, to wear a headset. I’m going to hear every damn thing that’s coming out of that controller. If that thing connects to anyone in the world, then I’m going to know what’s being said, and it damn sure won’t be said alone to him in a room. Things have changed since SNES. If that makes me a Nazi, then so be it.
Posted on 3/17/25 at 12:09 am to StringedInstruments
quote:
I highly recommend The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and Of Boys and Men by Richard Reeves.
I’ve listened to so many podcasts with these guys that I feel like I’ve read the books. They are dead on about the phones. Every parent can see it. And if you have boys, you can see how much society punishes them for exhibiting normal male behavior. Haidt and Reeves are great.
Posted on 3/17/25 at 2:40 am to Witty_Username
quote:
For a second there, I thought el gaucho was chiming in.
El Gaucho's kids are somewhere on the pipeline welding glass to granite.
Posted on 3/17/25 at 3:28 am to pelicanpride
quote:
We have one entertainment screen in our house, and that’s the living room TV. Bah, humbug.
That was our house until our kids got to high school. No TVs in any room of the house other than the living room. Our son got a gaming computer in our media/play room right off the living room for a portion of high school. No phones until 13. Wish we would have held off on smartphone until 16.
Both in college now. Son tends to use his phone less than his peers. Daughter (no pics) scrolls as much as any other college girl does.
Posted on 3/17/25 at 4:41 am to pelicanpride
There are no iPads during the week. We also just implemented a 2hr per day rule on the weekend. Kids are 8 and 10. Phones maybe in 7th grade
Posted on 3/17/25 at 6:20 am to pelicanpride
I shared a room with my brother growing up. We had two TV’s, one with Sega Genesis hooked up to it, another with an 8 bit Nintendo. We also had a half pipe in the backyard and neither of us owned a helmet.
Somehow, we are both productive members of society in our late 40’s.
Somehow, we are both productive members of society in our late 40’s.
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