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re: Divorce Prep
Posted on 9/11/25 at 5:46 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
Posted on 9/11/25 at 5:46 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
Sorry to hear. My dauhther (no pics) separated from her husband of ten years during May of 2024. They have 3 young kids.
Be patient. It is a long, slow, painful, expensive process. The family court system in south Louisiana is f-upped. Hearing officers act as 'gate keepers' for the judges. They are merely liberal DEI hacks. Prayers sent for you and your family. Regardless of what happens try to focus on the kids! Take care!
Be patient. It is a long, slow, painful, expensive process. The family court system in south Louisiana is f-upped. Hearing officers act as 'gate keepers' for the judges. They are merely liberal DEI hacks. Prayers sent for you and your family. Regardless of what happens try to focus on the kids! Take care!
0
Posted on 9/11/25 at 5:48 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
I’m not sure if this is a real thing or not, but I’ve heard one should get in contact with all the best divorce attorneys in the area first maybe setting up a meeting is a part of it, but basically it prevents them from being able to represent her? Can anyone confirm is that’s a thing or not? Just saying. Sorry to hear about your situation CFT.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 6:10 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
I'll say what I always say...don't let your emotions guide your actions. Men are held to a higher standard when it comes to emotions.
Plan to fight if you want to or plan to take a loss.
Don't make any crazy moves without sleeping on it, cooling down and thinking about it clearly.
Expect to have to go full out if you do fight her in court. Get a good attorney and plan, act calmly and build your case.
Seek to do as much as you can to secure your interest without giving her legal ammo to use against you
Don't let her play you with some angle where you need to accept her position or she banks on you being nice or kind, and don't agree to anything without your lawyer being part of the process.
Plan to fight if you want to or plan to take a loss.
Don't make any crazy moves without sleeping on it, cooling down and thinking about it clearly.
Expect to have to go full out if you do fight her in court. Get a good attorney and plan, act calmly and build your case.
Seek to do as much as you can to secure your interest without giving her legal ammo to use against you
Don't let her play you with some angle where you need to accept her position or she banks on you being nice or kind, and don't agree to anything without your lawyer being part of the process.
This post was edited on 9/11/25 at 6:20 pm
Posted on 9/11/25 at 6:21 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
I was married for 12 yrs, before getting divorced. You must find a way to talk to her about the welfare of the kids, first and foremost. When you tell them, you must agree on what to say to them and tell thenm together. Do this first, before you start the battle over money, possessions, etc.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 6:23 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
What does she do that’s so bad you want a divorce? Can’t you just work it out with her
Posted on 9/11/25 at 6:49 pm to nealnan8
quote:that’s pretty heartbreaking.
You must find a way to talk to her about the welfare of the kids, first and foremost. When you tell them, you must agree on what to say to them and tell thenm together. Do this first, before you start the battle over money, possessions, etc.
Selfish people suck
Posted on 9/11/25 at 6:54 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
ur fricked, regardless
know many of men, who just moved into basement, gave her the pay check, just to see their kids every night after work.
know many of men, who just moved into basement, gave her the pay check, just to see their kids every night after work.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 7:18 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
Same as colonoscopy prep…..
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:04 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
quote:
Side note, I live in Louisiana and my wife is/was a heavy drinker until the past few weeks. I'm assuming she's gotten advice from her lawyer and/or friends about that.
Since La. Is a no fault state, she could have cheated on you multiple times and it wouldn’t matter as far as the financial aspect is concerned. She will be entitled to half of everything.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:17 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
First and foremost, take the high road. She wants to get down in the mud, let her do so alone.
Always be thinking about the kids. Every decision you’re about to make has to be done with their best interest at heart.
Don’t do anything stupid. Cut off contact and only communicate via attorneys.
Are you prepared to take care of the kids. My marriage lasted 24 years. One child was in college, one a senior in HS and one a sophomore. The younger kids decided they wanted to live with me, and at their ages their mother knew they would stand before a judge and request to live with me.
My ex wife wound up paying me a whopping $120 a month for child support, based on her monthly income.
My youngest just started speaking to his mother again. It’s been seven years. It crushed him.
Always be thinking about the kids. Every decision you’re about to make has to be done with their best interest at heart.
Don’t do anything stupid. Cut off contact and only communicate via attorneys.
Are you prepared to take care of the kids. My marriage lasted 24 years. One child was in college, one a senior in HS and one a sophomore. The younger kids decided they wanted to live with me, and at their ages their mother knew they would stand before a judge and request to live with me.
My ex wife wound up paying me a whopping $120 a month for child support, based on her monthly income.
My youngest just started speaking to his mother again. It’s been seven years. It crushed him.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:18 pm to bdavids09
quote:
What does she do that’s so bad you want a divorce? Can’t you just work it out with her
She met with an atty, not me. I'm not looking to get divorced...at this time. I love the stability the kids currently have and being there when they first wake up. I don't want to give that up.
I've been thinking about this all day and the only thing I can think of is to go back to counseling with a different counselor/therapist and take all the f*cking alcohol out of the house. I don't want to do that but it looks like I'm going to have to do that. I don't know if she'll be in agreement but, I just want to buy some time. We've built the perfect setting for a family and I would hate to throw it away. I really can't imagine the toll it would take on my kids.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:38 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
quote:
I've been thinking about this all day and the only thing I can think of is to go back to counseling with a different counselor/therapist
You said earlier in this thread your wife consistently humiliates, degrades and emasculates you over her perceived insufficient lifestyle. She doesn't respect you. She probably hates you. Counseling will not fix anything. Your wife is an ungrateful c word who will only learn her lesson once you're gone.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:50 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
quote:
She met with an atty, not me. I'm not looking to get divorced...at this time. I love the stability the kids currently have and being there when they first wake up. I don't want to give that up.
Then fight like hell for your marriage and your kids. You love the stability for your kids? A divorce will destroy the very foundation your children rely on.
quote:
only thing I can think of is to go back to counseling with a different counselor/
Go see a different counselor. Go talk to a priest. Take your wife on a date - whatever it takes to bring your marriage together. Marriage is work at times! People get in a funk, and raising kids takes a toll on you. That said, you have to actively choose each other every single day and choose to be reminded of the beautiful blessing of God's grace. Pray for His guidance in your next steps and pray for your wife.
I fully believe that many marriages that end in divorce could have been salvaged.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 8:54 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
First word of advice. If she has hired an attorney, you need to get one ASAP.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 9:26 pm to HouseMom
quote:
That said, you have to actively choose each other every single day and choose to be reminded of the beautiful blessing of God's grace. Pray for His guidance in your next steps and pray for your wife.
Ask your wife to pray with you. The Intimacy of praying together is powerful.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 9:33 pm to TideSaint
quote:
Ask your friend what attorney she allegedly met with and schedule an appointment with their firm. That'll ham things up for her until you can get an attorney for yourself.
You watch too much TV. Every attorney runs a conflict of interest before they take a case. They would just tell him they can’t represent him.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 9:34 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
Why does she drink so much?
When did it start?
When did it start?
Posted on 9/11/25 at 10:03 pm to SCLibertarian
quote:
You said earlier in this thread your wife consistently humiliates, degrades and emasculates you over her perceived insufficient lifestyle. She doesn't respect you. She probably hates you. Counseling will not fix anything.
I agree with everything you said here but, the kids need a dad present and I feel I need more time being here. She's good at packing lunches but she's never disciplined them. In fact, she often un-punishes them when I send them to their room. The kids will undoubtedly turn into a-holes if she has primary custody. If we drag this out, I can always get away from her by working or just going outside.
quote:
Your wife is an ungrateful c word who will only learn her lesson once you're gone
I think about this every time I cook or fix something around the house. Part of me can't wait until the perfectly timed Amazon boxes stop showing up and she runs out of soap, toilet paper, paper towels, etc.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 10:11 pm to East Coast Band
quote:
Why does she drink so much?
When did it start?
She's always drank. She's given multiple reasons for drinking so much over the years but most recently she said it's because of me.
Posted on 9/11/25 at 10:20 pm to Cage Fighter Trainee
quote:
she said it's because of me.
Yep. Time to go bro.
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