re: Dads that pay child support: how do you do it?

After reading your post about "Hey I'm pregnant and in love with someone else", that kid probably isn't yours. Get the test because there isn't any way she just magically started that.

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I’m going to have to think outside the box.

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Do you have access to land?

If so, plant a few acres of cream, crowder or field peas, find a shucker and a Mexican or two and you can make some good money.

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that kid probably isn't yours.

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The test has been done

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He can dedicate one afternoon a week to at-home music lessons

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I could definitely do this

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Can you rent out a room to bring in some income?

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I'd be careful with that if he has any sort of split custody. Ex-wife might try to use that against him if the kid goes back and tells her stuff that she can use / spin to make it look like dad's house isn't a safe environment for a kid. Better check with your lawyer before you go that route.

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In any case, you will figure it out. My advice is do not let the child support make you bitter. Hopefully your ex uses it for the needs of your child.

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I always hear this. What it means to me is that no one's going to die but just because my kids live doesn't mean i didn't fail. I met my wife with 3 kids from the only loser she ever dated and he's on a restraining order now. Owes 55k in child support. Doesn't work. If he does, a grand per month is levied over to us. We're currently trying to hunt him down to both serve adoption papers for the 3 kids, and child support. Last month the lawyers worked out that if he'd give an address to be served, we'd drop the assault charges. So we moved the assault case out a month, this shirt sighted idiot didn't allow himself to be served so he's back to court Tuesday. Kicking the can down the road ig. He'll be jailed for not meeting the child support payment as well after a massive witch hunt, he was forced to court by the assault charge, which finally activated the 30 days to comply. This garbage is endless.

Meanwhile I signed a mortgage when I made 65 hours a week supervising. As soon as I signed the dotted line, the company brought in a guy to clean this place up and now OT is the devil. My wife has to do 6 months of sitting in a classroom helping a teacher, for free, and paying 4 to 5 grand to the school before she can become a certified, underpaid teacher. Rank 49th in teachers pay, God bless you Ron DeSantis. Had twins a year ago so we can't have her even begin that 6 month idiocy until they're old enough for school.

Then we have a school district issue, we have 2 acres out in blackwater that's prized land as a financial back up, but if we sell that then the twins have to go to a further away school while their siblings go to the closer one.

The problems never end, and I can't work too much or we come off EBT. Yeah, im sure I'll figure it out, but it doesn't mean It's not going to be really awful. Just means we survive. Going from taking care of my mom to a family of 5 with a mortage under bidenomics has been a big eye opener. I miss just working hard and things being ok, its so much more complicated now. Meanwhile I feel guilty for coming home and having a drink in what little free time I have to relax. Being a man ain't for the weak, as overlooked as that rhetorical statement is. Were really being pushed to the edge of the pendulum and its going to suck for everyone when it swings back.

Trust me iI. We waste nothing. We eat cheap, steak isn't even on the menu when we get EBT. It goes to storage for future problems. I have totes of dried food. We don't eat out at all. Me and my wife will for our anniversary but thats it. The idea if a paid vacation is laughable. Had to make the decision that we'd be a football only family because we can't afford all the costs of multiple sports. We've been to the movies on time for inside out 2. No snacks, just there for the movie. I maxed out my loan and I have a wonderful home and gave my children a wonderful home to grow up in but I'm tight as hell everywhere else besides something to drink after work and watching football practice.

This is becoming reality for so so many people, we have to live by the bare minimum and I feel for those who aren't used to having a nice restaurant meal or vacation here and there.

Edit: This is all said that I have a wonderful wife that I couldn't love more. I can't imagine going through what some of yall have. I'd be back in the gutters. My responsibilities and love for my wife and kids holds me up. Also makes me stress endlessly about failing them, but there's ups n downs to everything.

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Had the rare date one time and she wondered why we parked so far out, I came clean.

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Yup. While my wife conveniently maintained dual income with her POS boyfriend, I won’t sniff another successful date.

There's no better time for side hustles than right now.

You should absolutely not worry about looking or acting poor, first off. Get over yourself until you can live comfortably. Save some money, get an emergency fund, and go from there.

I would absolutely get a roomate. Be a little picky if you have to. If you have a pet, its very hard to find a place to stay for anyone with a dog. Find a single guy with a dog. Make sure its a very safe pet obviously with a child and ex wife involved.

Uber at night is a great way to make money. Go to a bar area from 7:30pm to 11pm or whatever. Airport rides in the early morning hours also pay well. Again both could be done around a long work day for just 1-3 hours a couple days a week to make an extra bit of money.

Get cheap on your vehicle. I'd get a small older Honda or Toyota sedan if you don't have one. I had one with 2 kids when I first got married. People love to think you need an extra full size car to keep kids safe. Frick that, get something cheap to own and drive.

When it comes to child support, ex-wives are like Paulie from Goodfellas:
Wrecked your car? F**** you, pay me...
Lost your job? F****you, pay me...
In the hospital? F****you, pay me...
Helped me out with the kids when I was sick? F***you, pay me...