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Message
re: Considering rebooting my life
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:00 pm to kingbob
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:00 pm to kingbob
quote:
I now have unshakable personal evidence that the Christian God exists, but also have unshakable personal evidence for why I shouldn't necessarily trust in said God. Our God is FALLIBLE. He makes MISTAKES...ALL THE TIME! As a result, I have struggled to go back to church since then.
This is a problem. Whatever you experienced wasn’t “the Christian God”. Sorry that’s the case despite your confidence in your unshakable evidence. No doubt something happened and it probably is having a profound influence on your current mindset.
Find a real church, traditional, conservative, orthodox, not a liberal believe nothing one. Get counseling. Get your faith in Christ back in balance. Get your heart right and your butt will follow.
All this other crap will fall in line.
quote:
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.
Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Are you not much more valuable than they?
Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
And why do you worry about clothes?
See how the flowers of the field grow.
They do not labor or spin.
Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.
If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?
So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:26-34
0
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:03 pm to kingbob
Most lawyers are shitty people. And most of them weren't always shitty, but the work makes them shitty. Sucks that you're finding out AFTER working as one.
Best advice I can give you is work absolutely as little as possible to sustain the kind of life you can tolerate. Then find a woman, have babies and define yourself by what kind of people you raise and the affect that you can have on their lives.
Defining yourself by your work is for empty, simple, sad pathetic men.
Ratan Tata has more money than he can spend in a lifetime. He has the love of his country, and there isn't any interview I've seen of him that he doesn't look full of regret and sadness because he has no heir.
Procreate. Leave a lasting legacy of people that talk about you lovingly and respectfully even after your dead. This is immorality.
Best advice I can give you is work absolutely as little as possible to sustain the kind of life you can tolerate. Then find a woman, have babies and define yourself by what kind of people you raise and the affect that you can have on their lives.
Defining yourself by your work is for empty, simple, sad pathetic men.
Ratan Tata has more money than he can spend in a lifetime. He has the love of his country, and there isn't any interview I've seen of him that he doesn't look full of regret and sadness because he has no heir.
Procreate. Leave a lasting legacy of people that talk about you lovingly and respectfully even after your dead. This is immorality.
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 6:05 pm
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:09 pm to kingbob
quote:
For some background, I'm an attorney in my early 30's. I've tried two different professional careers so far and struggled with both (construction and law). I have yet to work a single job that paid me enough to live that I didn't absolutely hate. Most jobs I have worked made me feel like a bad person just for doing my job, and I never felt particularly "good" at any of those jobs either.
So given your age and minimum 7 years of education, I'm estimating you have only spent about 5-7 years in the workforce. From my experience, it takes about 5 years in a high skill job to learn it well enough to feel good at it. Job satisfaction will come from feeling skilled at what you do. If you have worked 2 careers in that 5-7 year time span, you are likely quitting just before you turn that corner where you feel good about what you do.
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 6:10 pm
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:22 pm to Philzilla
Faithfully (meaning be honest) take the Myers Briggs exam. Its an eye opener and can help with planning.
You may find a perfunctory type of work may suit you better than something you bring home with you every day. The law you bring home everyday, weekends, vacations, it never goes away.
You may find a perfunctory type of work may suit you better than something you bring home with you every day. The law you bring home everyday, weekends, vacations, it never goes away.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:22 pm to kingbob
quote:This is what I try to tell anyone that tells me they want to be a lawyer.
subject matter, billable hours requirements, morality issues, etc). When I've gotten to do "actual legal work" like draft motions for summary judgment and argue in court, I've enjoyed those portions. The problem is that "actual legal work" is like 0.00000001% of being a lawyer in my experience.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:22 pm to Teddy Ruxpin
quote:
Before changing careers I suggest leaving LA.
This. Unfortunately.
quote:
It is also possible the problem is you, and I don't mean that negatively. Working sucks for most people. People just do it because they have to in a lot/most instances. This doesn't mean continue to be unhappy, but really think about your feelings regarding work.
This as well.
I know, that's zero help. I've been fortunate that in what I've chosen to do out of college, I've enjoyed the work with the exception of a two year stint with a corporate company in Lafayette. I've spent many years self-employed.
Took and chance with a job opportunity roughly 10 years ago that feels like hitting the jackpot as far as enjoying the work but also work/life balance. It's made the family life 700% better.
Really wish you well and hope you find what fits you best.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:50 pm to kingbob
Find a job that would fulfill you if you were not making a ton of money doing it. No matter what you do the answer to “Do you think you get paid enough?” will always be “It could be more.” Money is always going to be a temporary fill. If what you’re going does not bring joy and value to your life, no amount of money will fulfill you. Best of luck.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:52 pm to kingbob
quote:
For me, I think some of my struggles in law are due to the nature of the positions in law that I have held to date (subject matter, billable hours requirements, morality issues, etc). When I've gotten to do "actual legal work" like draft motions for summary judgment and argue in court, I've enjoyed those portions. The problem is that "actual legal work" is like 0.00000001% of being a lawyer in my experience.
That is basically every professional, high skill job. In my job I spend 10% of my time or less doing my actual job title and 90% of the time in preparation, meetings, writing documents, emails, etc.
If I'm hearing any theme in your posts it is that you hate unpredictability, long hours, bosses with last minute demands, etc. You will never escape this completely, but your best bet may be state or federal government work and not a position like prosecutor, investigator, field enforcement, etc. Stick to a headquarters regulatory office doing general documents, filings, application processing, etc.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:53 pm to kingbob
void
This post was edited on 6/17/23 at 11:40 am
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:55 pm to kingbob
I work 15 weeks out of the year, am in the top 1% of wage earners and...
I hate it.
Whatver you do for money will eventually suck. Just suck it up and make the best of it while stockpiling money to retire early.
I hate it.
Whatver you do for money will eventually suck. Just suck it up and make the best of it while stockpiling money to retire early.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:56 pm to kingbob
Construction and law are both miserable career paths. Easy to see why you’re disgruntled. Welcome to hell, it never gets better. Most high paying careers are beatdowns.
Work for money, not happiness—compartmentalization is key.
Work for money, not happiness—compartmentalization is key.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:56 pm to kingbob
quote:
I used to be. I had a near death experience last year where I literally visited the afterlife. It has definitely shaken me to my core and left me questioning everything that I previously knew. It's a weird dichotomy, I now have unshakable personal evidence that the Christian God exists, but also have unshakable personal evidence for why I shouldn't necessarily trust in said God. Our God is FALLIBLE. He makes MISTAKES...ALL THE TIME! As a result, I have struggled to go back to church since then. quote:I've always had some sense I had a mission and knew what I want to do with my life I was offered a mission in the after life, but it was one completely antithetical to my values as a person. I turned the mission down, and was told that it was my cross to bear to not allow that mission to happen if I was rejecting it. I know that's really vague and weird, but Peter's a real piece of work, after-all. Never met an answer he wanted to give straight.
I know I’m not exactly what one might call a friend of organized religion, but have you considered questioning the objective reality of this experience in light of the fact that it seems to run counter to, literally, every known human religion?
On a mildly related note, I would be genuinely interested to read the detail. I obviously can’t speak for the rest of these miscreants, but I would read without comment or critique, beyond simply acknowledging that I had seen it
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:57 pm to kingbob
Change can be difficult and stressful. But it can be an adventure too. At your age and circumstances you are free to explore whatever and wherever you wish to do.
Go find a job elsewhere-it doesn't have to be the one you will stay at the rest of your life-in fact odds are you will switch jobs and professions several times before you retire.
There are a lot of cool places to live-here in the US and elsewhere. Consider it as an adventure or vacation.
Hell I packed up and moved to Seattle when I was 60 just for the experience of doing something different in my life. Went from living in suburbia TX to an urban lifestyle just to see what is was like-walking to work every day and enjoying the city before it went really to crap
Grandkids pulled me back eventually but I am a bit of a gypsy anyway. This is probably not my last stop..
Don't overthink it-just go explore the world. There ain't nothing to be afraid of out there-jump on the Greyhound and go.
Go find a job elsewhere-it doesn't have to be the one you will stay at the rest of your life-in fact odds are you will switch jobs and professions several times before you retire.
There are a lot of cool places to live-here in the US and elsewhere. Consider it as an adventure or vacation.
Hell I packed up and moved to Seattle when I was 60 just for the experience of doing something different in my life. Went from living in suburbia TX to an urban lifestyle just to see what is was like-walking to work every day and enjoying the city before it went really to crap
Grandkids pulled me back eventually but I am a bit of a gypsy anyway. This is probably not my last stop..
Don't overthink it-just go explore the world. There ain't nothing to be afraid of out there-jump on the Greyhound and go.
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 7:02 pm
Posted on 6/13/23 at 6:59 pm to kingbob
quote:
I used to be. I had a near death experience last year where I literally visited the afterlife. It has definitely shaken me to my core and left me questioning everything that I previously knew. It's a weird dichotomy, I now have unshakable personal evidence that the Christian God exists, but also have unshakable personal evidence for why I shouldn't necessarily trust in said God. Our God is FALLIBLE. He makes MISTAKES...ALL THE TIME! As a result, I have struggled to go back to church since then.
You sound like a great candidate for an ayahuasca journey or a weekend of dropping acid in the tropics.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:01 pm to kingbob
quote:
just realized that there really isn't anything keeping me in Baton Rouge any more, that I'm flaming out in my career, I don't have any kids or a spouse whose needs I need to take into consideration, and what I have done up to this point straight up isn't working anymore.
Bro, get the frick out of this state.
If I didn’t have kids with an ex-wife I would’ve never came back when I separated from the military.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:04 pm to kingbob
I changed careers and regret it every day
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 7:04 pm
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:06 pm to kingbob
You made it through law school.
How about getting an MBA. I’d thing engineering or medical school would fit well.
How about getting an MBA. I’d thing engineering or medical school would fit well.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:09 pm to kingbob
No one can tell you exactly what to do because everyone is different. The one thing I believe and would tell anybody is the little extra money isn’t worth driving yourself into the ground. Of course there is a point where you need to make enough to live comfortably. Find something that you don’t absolutely hate. Doesn’t work stupid hours and weekends. Life is too short to spend it working more than you have to.
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:11 pm to kingbob
I like u king Bob keep ya head up bruh
I also like the idea of getting your MBA and pivoting to a corporate legal role
I also like the idea of getting your MBA and pivoting to a corporate legal role
This post was edited on 6/13/23 at 7:18 pm
Posted on 6/13/23 at 7:12 pm to kingbob
I have an attorney friend who pivoted to legal recruiting. You could try that. I’d definitely consider moving out of state if nothing is keeping you here.
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