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re: Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances
Posted on 5/21/24 at 9:49 pm to Mr Clean
Posted on 5/21/24 at 9:49 pm to Mr Clean
quote:
And a point of clarity - when i say hotel living …she isn’t holed up in a hotel - she is just traveling to different cities but the past week as been w/ our youngest You are an elite excuse maker
Or she’s just, like, on vacation?
0
Posted on 5/22/24 at 3:49 am to 850SaintsGator
My quess is that she's preparing to move out and divorce you. Hotels... maybe an apartment in the works. She's getting everything lined up. Are items and her clothes disappearing from the house?
I suggest talking to a lawyer immediately and do everything he/she says to do. You may be advised to file for divorce (which gives you some control), to hire a PI to document her activities especially when your kids are with her, to move money to another bank and limit her access to funds. You've got to take charge, for your kids and for yourself so you can function as the good parent and provider. And, stay in the house.
The divorce process should include psych evaluations of you, her and the kids...they will be thorough and powerful.
I suggest talking to a lawyer immediately and do everything he/she says to do. You may be advised to file for divorce (which gives you some control), to hire a PI to document her activities especially when your kids are with her, to move money to another bank and limit her access to funds. You've got to take charge, for your kids and for yourself so you can function as the good parent and provider. And, stay in the house.
The divorce process should include psych evaluations of you, her and the kids...they will be thorough and powerful.
This post was edited on 5/22/24 at 4:17 am
Posted on 5/22/24 at 6:32 am to broadhead
quote:
read through two pages but if no one told the OP please check your credit report. I wouldn't be surprised if she has open credit account that are maxed out. Ol'boy is screwed.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she maxed out a card or 3 and now she is withdrawing cash because she can’t figure out a way to get a 4th card
Posted on 5/22/24 at 8:07 am to 850SaintsGator
We need an update on this...
Posted on 5/22/24 at 8:11 am to 850SaintsGator
Where the money going? Are these cash withdrawals.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 8:16 am to 850SaintsGator
quote:
Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances
quote:
I know I’m coming to the correct place-
Obviously not, since you did not post pics!
quote:
She has been withdrawing money starting about 10days ago…$200 here …$300 there etc
quote:
i asked why is this happening- she says, paying bills
Y'all pay bills in cash? Standing in line at the "bill pay" with the rest of the trailer dwellers?
quote:
i just want to know the truth.
You know the truth, but you just don't want to admit it.
quote:
She protested etc said it might not be legal etc blah blah
Oh, yeh....She's got mental issues. What could be illegal about a separate account?
quote:
most of this month she has been hotel living bc she says she feels unsafe around me etc
That's hilarious!
quote:
I don’t think she is doing drugs or illicit stuff- idk the cash money - i think it’s the mental health stuff)
So, you think she just likes to collect "cash money". Have you made a surpise vist to the hotel she is living in?
C'mon man!
P.S. This is a pretty decent drama you've concocted here for the attention. I actually know a guy who had a kinda similar thing pulled on him.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 12:50 pm to Boudreaux35
quote:
I actually know a guy who had a kinda similar thing pulled on him.
Keep going. We can live vicariously through him since the OP vanished
Posted on 5/22/24 at 7:20 pm to Mr Clean
Yeah, what he said!
Posted on 5/22/24 at 7:42 pm to 850SaintsGator
Man I am sorry you are having to deal with this but I think you are dealing with a bipolar person. My family had this situation with my sister. You definitely need some legal advice but you need to start going on the defense of protecting your money. Do the separate account but make sure that you are on the up and up as you will have to justify every credit/debit if and when the day comes. Also start trying to intercept the bills instead of her using that as a carte Blanche excuse. You know your situation so again start the defense.
Good luck to you man.
Good luck to you man.
Posted on 5/23/24 at 2:11 am to 850SaintsGator
I went through the same thing years ago. First it was a $100 here, $200 there. Then it was credit cards and then the HELOC. Then she liquidated my son’s college savings account. Took less than a year and it was all gone.
She wasn’t spending the money on drugs or booze. She literally was giving it away. The voices in her head were telling her it’d help save her and our family.
Your wife needs help. She has some kind of mental illness. You’ve already said it runs in the family. Who knows why or what is causing it. Meds, age, genetics. It doesn’t matter.
You need to step up and protect your financial health. And if you care about her and your family get her the help she needs or it’ll get worse until she accepts she needs help.
She wasn’t spending the money on drugs or booze. She literally was giving it away. The voices in her head were telling her it’d help save her and our family.
Your wife needs help. She has some kind of mental illness. You’ve already said it runs in the family. Who knows why or what is causing it. Meds, age, genetics. It doesn’t matter.
You need to step up and protect your financial health. And if you care about her and your family get her the help she needs or it’ll get worse until she accepts she needs help.
This post was edited on 5/23/24 at 2:14 am
Posted on 5/23/24 at 2:28 am to ATLTigerbb
Man find a god friend who is close to the situation not us or find a lawyer. Protect the cash for now and any credit cards. Make sure the kids are ok and get them out of needed. The next step will her taking and leaving with them or her saying some crap and getting you kicked out of your house until things are settled. Trust me on this. If she is unstable be careful they can ruin your life with a phone call of you get in a fight. Be careful.
Posted on 5/27/24 at 4:25 pm to 850SaintsGator
Any improvement to this situation? How are your kids?
Posted on 5/27/24 at 4:49 pm to Booyow
quote:
owes her pimp his money
not pimp, plug
Posted on 5/27/24 at 5:58 pm to 850SaintsGator
A few questions need to be answered before any solid advice can be given.
Are kids involved? If yes, your situation just took a huge detour. If there are kids, are they with her or you?
She's said she's afraid of you, so why would she say such a thing? Is there any history of domestic violence or any type of restraining order involved? For your sake, I hope not.
You said you're the only one working currently. When was the last time she held a job and contributed to the household income?
Have you spoken to her family and friends and do any agree with you? If you can get any family member or close friend of hers to take your side, that's a game changer.
Does her family have a history of mental illness?
Is this a sudden situation or this has been going on for a while, including the talk of divorce?
First thing I would do is take care of the kids, if there are any.
Second, go see an attorney ASAP just to cover your back.
Thirdly, I would continue to trying to secure your finances, even if that means cutting her off until things can be settled.
Lastly, limit your contact with her because if she's truly going through a mental situation, she needs help. If she's doing all of this because she wants a divorce, the less contact the better!
Good luck brother! I've been through an ugly divorce and the kids are the ones hurt the most. The only ones that win in this type of situation are the attorneys!
Are kids involved? If yes, your situation just took a huge detour. If there are kids, are they with her or you?
She's said she's afraid of you, so why would she say such a thing? Is there any history of domestic violence or any type of restraining order involved? For your sake, I hope not.
You said you're the only one working currently. When was the last time she held a job and contributed to the household income?
Have you spoken to her family and friends and do any agree with you? If you can get any family member or close friend of hers to take your side, that's a game changer.
Does her family have a history of mental illness?
Is this a sudden situation or this has been going on for a while, including the talk of divorce?
First thing I would do is take care of the kids, if there are any.
Second, go see an attorney ASAP just to cover your back.
Thirdly, I would continue to trying to secure your finances, even if that means cutting her off until things can be settled.
Lastly, limit your contact with her because if she's truly going through a mental situation, she needs help. If she's doing all of this because she wants a divorce, the less contact the better!
Good luck brother! I've been through an ugly divorce and the kids are the ones hurt the most. The only ones that win in this type of situation are the attorneys!
This post was edited on 5/27/24 at 6:02 pm
Posted on 5/27/24 at 7:24 pm to SwampyWaters
quote:
A few questions need to be answered before any solid advice can be given. Are kids involved? If yes, your situation just took a huge detour. If there are kids, are they with her or you?
He’s AWOL
Posted on 6/5/24 at 11:30 am to Mr Clean
Still no updates??
Posted on 6/11/24 at 1:45 pm to im4LSU
quote:
Still no updates??
Bump to see if OP was ever reunited with his child.
Posted on 6/11/24 at 3:59 pm to Ben Hur
This reads like the OP has his own substance abuse issues and got busted doing either drugs or cheating (or both)
He started this thread to help convince himself she was a shitty person but felt guilty and started the white knight act
I’d love to get the in laws and SO’s take on the situation.
Regardless the OP got the sympathy he needed and has disappeared
ETA : he hasn’t posted since 5/20 so the people following him and his wife may have finally caught up to them
He started this thread to help convince himself she was a shitty person but felt guilty and started the white knight act
I’d love to get the in laws and SO’s take on the situation.
Regardless the OP got the sympathy he needed and has disappeared
ETA : he hasn’t posted since 5/20 so the people following him and his wife may have finally caught up to them
This post was edited on 6/11/24 at 4:02 pm
Posted on 6/11/24 at 4:12 pm to ATLTigerbb
quote:
She literally was giving it away. The voices in her head were telling her it’d help save her and our family.
Who are you to question the Lord when he speaks to your wife?
Posted on 6/11/24 at 4:19 pm to 850SaintsGator
Jesus I love my sane wife
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