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Started By
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re: Being a bridesmaid or best man is more of a financial burden than an honor
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:03 am to ibldprplgld
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:03 am to ibldprplgld
quote:
I was asked (and said yes) to stand in both before "destination" got brought up, so I was between a rock and a hard place.
I've learned my lesson.
Destination as in Houston? Or Destination as in "insert Caribbean island here"?
1
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:06 am to Golfer
Pretty close. One was in Nappa and the other the British Virgin Islands.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:07 am to LNCHBOX
quote:
absolutely would notice that, and I can guarantee you many others would to. The last weeding I was in I bought shoes the day of the wedding because the tux shop told me the wrong info. I wasn't going to be the only one not matching.
Why is not looking like a slob a female trait?
You look better in your own tux than a rental. The only real noticeable difference is collar which is pretty irrelevant from beyond the first few rows.
That is $200 the groom can save his wedding party along with the headache of returning the tux the next day. There is always people traveling in.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:08 am to TH03
quote:
You have shitty friends then. That's shady.
This
Even though I had a poor man’s version of a destination wedding we still let people know way ahead of time. And was totally understanding if people couldn’t travel there due to finances.
If you want a destination wedding....you should be realistic and realize it will be a small wedding of just close friends and family with a small wedding party. It isn’t appropriate to decide you want 10 bridesmaids and groomsmen to all travel to whatever location you decide on.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:09 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
The only real noticeable difference is collar which is pretty irrelevant from beyond the first few rows.
plus, if somebody notices this they're trying to find things to notice and criticize
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:10 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
You look better in your own tux than a rental.
OK.
quote:
The only real noticeable difference is collar which is pretty irrelevant from beyond the first few rows.
False. Like very very false. You aren't into clothing at all, that's fine. You don't speak for every male. (ETA: and even if it's not noticeable to guests, it will be very noticeable in the pictures.)
quote:
That is $200 the groom can save his wedding party along with the headache of returning the tux the next day. There is always people traveling in.
Assuming everyone already owns one tux that is the same color, sure. That's also a pretty steep rental rate. I've only had one rental that topped $200, most have been under $150.
This post was edited on 6/10/19 at 11:11 am
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:10 am to TH03
quote:
I don't get why people try to bash others for how they spend their own money
I don't get why people bash others for sharing an opinion.
Have you never shared yours about something you thought was unreasonable, dumb, head scratching even though they have the right to do whatever they want?
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:11 am to LNCHBOX
quote:
Assuming everyone already owns one tux that is the same color, sure.
Yeah most people own black tuxes
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:11 am to RLDSC FAN
Honestly the vast majority of weddings I’ve been to have either been your normal wedding, same kinds I’ve been going to for 35 plus years or backyard weddings. Even wealthier people I know have thrown pretty “simple” weddings. I have been to many of them all over Louisiana (maybe that’s why) and never see these extravagant weddings and reception parties the OT talks about. Even the younger millennials weddings have been no different today from what I’ve seen than they were in 1988.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:11 am to RLDSC FAN
quote:
So who’s to blame? The Bride. Forty-eight percent of people blamed the bride for pressure to spend on the event, while 35% blamed the spending on pressure from other bridal-party members. Only 21% blamed the groom.
If you think about it, a very significant portion of the stupid shite we waste money on as a society in order to signal wealth to each other comes from women who are not financially responsible for the actual purchase at point of sale.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:12 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
Yeah most people own black tuxes
Which is why there are so many tux rental places
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:12 am to RockyMtnTigerWDE
quote:
Have you never shared yours about something you thought was unreasonable, dumb, head scratching even though they have the right to do whatever they want?
It isn't reasonable when I do it either.
It's just decently well off upper middle class people who can't fathom having $50-100k just to blow on one night of partying.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:13 am to TH03
quote:
It's high, but at the end of the day, it's their money. I don't get why people try to bash others for how they spend their own money.
Sometimes it is their money, and sometimes it's dad's money.
I just find it foolish when a couple spends $50,000 on a wedding that doesn't last a year.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:13 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
Yeah most people own black tuxes
False.
And I say that as someone who has owned multiple black tuxes since high school.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:14 am to windshieldman
I've only been to 2 pricey weddings. Both were well north of 100k. Most have just been normal type weddings.
I'm gonna get married in a box
I'm gonna get married in a box
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:14 am to Revelator
quote:
Sometimes it is their money, and sometimes it's dad's money
If it's their money and they can't easily afford that, it's dumb. Traditionally the bride's family pays anyways.
quote:
I just find it foolish when a couple spends $50,000 on a wedding that doesn't last a year.
How many people do you know that did this?
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:14 am to windshieldman
I'd be hesitant, not bc I'm poor, (I am), but bc the odds of a marriage lasting are small these days.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:19 am to TH03
I was in a wedding 2 weeks ago that cost me about ~3k from start to finish. and it was well worth it. You cant put a price tag on fun.
Its nice to have weddings when everyone is financially stable and can afford out of country bachelor parties and not have to penny pinch. And if you cant afford it, its understandable, no harm, no foul.
Its nice to have weddings when everyone is financially stable and can afford out of country bachelor parties and not have to penny pinch. And if you cant afford it, its understandable, no harm, no foul.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:21 am to yellowfin
Renting tuxedos and trips can get expensive, but being in a wedding is a privilege for me, so I do not mind the money that goes into it.
There was on bachelor trip I simply could not afford, and I was upfront with the groom and it was a nonissue.
There was on bachelor trip I simply could not afford, and I was upfront with the groom and it was a nonissue.
Posted on 6/10/19 at 11:22 am to TH03
quote:
False.
And I say that as someone who has owned multiple black tuxes since high school.
Let me restate this, it’s very common for people in their mid 20s+ to own a black tux and it’s very inconvenient to rent tuxes. Most people don’t notice the difference and it’s a nice thing to for your wedding party.
I’ve been in several weddings that have done the “wear your own”. It’s very nice especially when you have to travel for it.
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