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re: ATL - Toddler Left in Car

Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:15 am to
Posted by AngryBeavers
Member since Jun 2012
4554 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:15 am to
quote:

100% of people make careless mistakes

some careless mistakes are just more horrific than others


This^
Posted by HeadyMurphey
Los Santos
Member since Jan 2008
17185 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:15 am to
Right, my careless mistakes are leaving the food on the counter and forgetting to put it in the fridge. Not forgetting my offspring in a baking car
Posted by Pettifogger
Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone
Member since Feb 2012
79235 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:16 am to
quote:

some careless mistakes are just more horrific than others



Which is why we go to far more lengths to avoid not running over pedestrians than we do to not dropping things on the floor.
Posted by GRTiger
On a roof eating alligator pie
Member since Dec 2008
63060 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:17 am to
quote:

Looking for excuses ahead of time seems like a recipe for disaster.


Actually, assuming you are immune is what is called for in the recipe for disaster. Knowing how this could happen is exactly what everyone should be thinking about, preferably every time you take your child with you in a car. And these aren't excuses, they are causes.
Posted by Salmon
On the trails
Member since Feb 2008
83583 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:18 am to
quote:

Actually, assuming you are immune is what is called for in the recipe for disaster.


this this this

thinking "this could never happen to me, I'm a super parent!" is the recipe for disaster
Posted by theantiquetiger
Paid Premium Member Plus
Member since Feb 2005
19227 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:18 am to
quote:

I really cannot understand how this happens. Could have something to do with priorities.


There have been studies on this. There is no pattern what so ever, age, race, wealth/poor, education.

Both my daughters are big enough now to open car doors (and don't ride in car seats (one in booster), but this was always my fear, as well as electric shock and choking.
Posted by GeauxTigerTM
Member since Sep 2006
30596 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:18 am to
quote:

100% of people make careless mistakes

some careless mistakes are just more horrific than others


That's the argument though, isn't it? Just how careless are you?

Sure...we all make mistakes. the issue is, just how far up your own arse must your head be to make a mistake like this? I'm saying that AS A PARENT, I was never in a situation where this ever came close to happening. Why? Because regardless of my routine or how busy I was, I took a little bit of time to recognize that my kids were with me and that they were my priority until they were no longer with me. That simple thing made me continually look into the back seat. It focused me on their presence and did not allow me to shift off to other worries. It wasn't hard...but then I put them first.

None of that makes me perfect. It just makes me a caring, responsible parent. That's not a difficult job provided your kids come before yourself. They ought to, after all...but it's clear that they don't for many.
Posted by Isabelle
Member since Jul 2012
2726 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:19 am to
Routine not. Responsibility, yes.
Posted by sicboy
Because Awesome
Member since Nov 2010
77620 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:20 am to
And I guess you only read what you want to. For myself personally, I can't see it happening. Taking care of my child is priority one, and I don't let that get lost in any of my other responsibilities. If it's just him and me, everything else revolves around him. With my wife, we tag team with someone always with the kid.

I'm sure everyone says that this could never happen to them until it actually does, so I don't want a story like this to get me on my high horse. I'm fortunate and I will work hard to continue to set myself up so that this kind of thing will never happen.


But I'm sorry, you'll never convince me that those two are the same.

Posted by Pettifogger
Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone
Member since Feb 2012
79235 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:21 am to
quote:

thinking "this could never happen to me, I'm a super parent!" is the recipe for disaster



Agreed, but we also don't want anything approaching societal "excuse" for this behavior.
Posted by Salmon
On the trails
Member since Feb 2008
83583 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:23 am to
quote:

we also don't want anything approaching societal "excuse" for this behavior.


no doubt

Posted by GRTiger
On a roof eating alligator pie
Member since Dec 2008
63060 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:25 am to
It's insulting that you think your position comes from the fact that taking care of your child is priority one. I assume that's true for most people in this thread, and it certainly is for me. So maybe lose that absurd argument that we must disagree because of priorities.

What if I said the fact that the tiny potential this rare and unthinkable accident doesn't phase you in the slightest makes me think you don't care for your child?
Posted by The Third Leg
Idiot Out Wandering Around
Member since May 2014
10052 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:25 am to
quote:

Agreed, but we also don't want anything approaching societal "excuse" for this behavior.

It's amazing, really. Here we sit in a highly developed nation, which is also the largest consumer of recreational narcotics and the most prolific jailer in the history of mankind.

In this nation we empathize with people whose poor decisions lead to infant mortality but drug addicts are locked up for years and rendered unemployable.

Accountability must be evolving as a term.
Posted by Hardy_Har
MS
Member since Nov 2012
16285 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:27 am to
quote:

Sure...we all make mistakes. the issue is, just how far up your own arse must your head be to make a mistake like this?


Mental "walking around sense" plays in as well. I have a good friend who is briliant, makes a load of $$ but lost his car keys in his refridgerator last month.. Some people are more capable of a mistake like this than others that love their child just the same..
Posted by GeauxTigerTM
Member since Sep 2006
30596 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:27 am to
quote:

Actually, assuming you are immune is what is called for in the recipe for disaster.


I wasn't immune! Jesus Tap-dancing Christ...

Preventing this was simple. It took almost no effort. It didn't require any new gadgets. It did not require any special habits like a stuffed animal in their seat.

All it took was paying attention to them. I'm not sure why that sounds like something special, but it really is not.

It's not that I was immune to this. It's that I recognize that when my children are with me, there are bad things that can happen to them if I'm not vigilant. This can be demonstrated in any number of examples where all it takes to prevent something bad happening is an ounce of prevention. I make the effort. If my making the effort makes others feel badly because they don't, then that's on them. But I'm not interested in pretending this is some plague that's liable to happen to anyone...it isn't.

In these situations, I do not feel bad for the parents...even if it was an "honest mistake." I feel badly for the child who baked, and for the future and life they will never have because their parent unfortunately placed their own schedule and/or routine ahead of making sure their child was ok.
Posted by GetBackToWork
Member since Dec 2007
6260 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:28 am to
This can happen easily with the right mix of distractions and a sleeping child.

I was out running errands one afternoon. Mind starts drifting and you forget the kid is in back. I didn't leave the car, but it shocked me enough to think for a few minutes you could slip and make a tragic error.
Posted by Golfer
Member since Nov 2005
75052 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:28 am to
What I find most interesting is that people are against the idea that a kid is part of a routine but support the steps such as a car baby monitor or stuffed animal.

What do they think turning those on or relying on these as assistants are?
Posted by sicboy
Because Awesome
Member since Nov 2010
77620 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:29 am to
I'm not attacking the people who this happens to. I'm just disagreeing with whoever it was that equated it to a household task.
Posted by Golfer
Member since Nov 2005
75052 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:30 am to
quote:

I'm not attacking the people who this happens to. I'm just disagreeing with whoever it was that equated it to a household task.


That's not what I was doing and you know it.
Posted by The Third Leg
Idiot Out Wandering Around
Member since May 2014
10052 posts
Posted on 6/19/14 at 10:30 am to
quote:

What I find most interesting is that people are against the idea that a kid is part of a routine but support the steps such as a car baby monitor or stuffed animal. What do they think turning those on or relying on these as assistants are?

Who gives a shite if it is routine or not? The issue here is responsibility.
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