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Message
As I was leaving home this AM, the wife said, "Wait, I want to give you a screw."
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:17 pm
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:17 pm
I'm not usually amorous at 9:00 AM, but what the heck - if she's that horny, maybe I can even coax a bj from her. Although I had already showered and dressed, I immediately expressed my enthusiasm for her suggestion. But no, she handed me a small bolt (which she erroneously identified as a screw) and wanted me to run by the hardware store while I was out and pick up several like it. Oh well, there's always the Christmas bj coming up.
21
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:18 pm to blueridgeTiger
This is bad and you should feel bad.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:18 pm to blueridgeTiger
Hoped this was a david the gnome thread
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:18 pm to blueridgeTiger
No matter what people say on here attacking you for this post, there is no doubt in my mind that this is content.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:19 pm to blueridgeTiger
How you gonna make it another week cuzz?
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:19 pm to blueridgeTiger
NM.
False advertisement in the thread title.
False advertisement in the thread title.
This post was edited on 12/16/19 at 12:21 pm
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:19 pm to blueridgeTiger
Amazing people don't know the difference between a bolt and a screw.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:19 pm to blueridgeTiger
nice joke, skillet...sheesh 
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:20 pm to arseinclarse
I would say it's on par.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:20 pm to blueridgeTiger
quote:
I'm not usually amorous at 9:00 AM, but what the heck - if she's that horny, maybe I can even coax a bj from her. Although I had already showered and dressed, I immediately expressed my enthusiasm for her suggestion. But no, she handed me a small bolt (which she erroneously identified as a screw) and wanted me to run by the hardware store while I was out and pick up several like it. Oh well, there's always the Christmas bj coming up.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:21 pm to blueridgeTiger
Same thing happened to my cousin but his wife thru the screw at him, which stuck in his left eye then she severed his jugular.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:22 pm to blueridgeTiger
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:23 pm to blueridgeTiger
I knew the punchline before I read your post.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:23 pm to blueridgeTiger
Don't worry Jodi gave her a real screw after you got to work
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:23 pm to blueridgeTiger
quote:
there's always the Christmas bj coming up.
Yeah I’m looking forward to that
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:24 pm to blueridgeTiger
not funny. didn’t laugh
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:26 pm to blueridgeTiger
That's miserable.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:31 pm to blueridgeTiger
i knew this was not going to start or end well for you. how bout i save you with the walmart joke martini posted years ago and then forgot he posted it and posted it again 2 weeks later.
“I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my dog at Walmart and standing in line at the check out.
“A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
“On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting the Purina Diet again although I probably shouldn’t because I’d ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
“I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
“I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.
“Horrified, she asked if I’d ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the dog food. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle’s arse and a car hit me.
“I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:33 pm to LSUballs
quote:
but his wife thru the screw at him, wh
Sounds like she might have a good arm. Did she play travel ball?
Posted on 12/16/19 at 12:34 pm to blueridgeTiger
What grown man isn’t already working by 9am?
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