re: Annual Thanksgiving Play By Play Gamethread

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To top it all off, Precious, the elderly cat with loose uncontrollable bowels, decided to sneak in the garage. The MIL, in a panic, rushed to the rescue, only to have Precious slip off my Porsche and scratch the bonnet.

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This would enrage me that she defended him and not your right to confront such disrespect. I would feel that she secretly enjoyed his action

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I was thinking the same thing. She should have been fine with her husband choking the old arse slapper unconscious. If she likes that sort of attention, hubby has a bigger problem.

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This has potential

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I think it’s pretty much over. Blue haired cousin’s mom is my wife’s aunt who lives with my MIL, they’re sisters, old (75 & 80something), and widowed. Anyway, they’ve turned the upstairs of my MIL’s house into an apartment for her sister (blue hair’s mom). After the fireworks the aunt and cousin both went upstairs so I think it’s pretty much over, unless there’s some parting shots when blue hair cousin comes down to leave.

My aunt is convinced my mom doesn't eat anymore, has lost a lot of weight. Argued about with each other over that for 15 minutes.

My step father was ordered to pick up 2 pies from his sister. Supposed to be a gooseberry rhubarb one and something else. She was out of that one, but had a rhubarb and goosebery,, so he got one of each.

People started eating it, and then my mom kept telling everyone it's rhubarb gooseberry, I'm like no it's not mom, look at it. One is rhubarb, one is gooseberry. More people walked in, started repeating the same nonsense.

My mom and aunt broke into champagne, now tipsy and emotional. Crying to each other in the kitchen.

My step dad is threatening to take my keys until I help move a fricking huge sectional couch upstairs, and the one upstairs downstairs. Naw dude.

Help your stepdad you ingrate!

Your wife is a keeper

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The main highlight I overheard was “well unlike you, she knows she doesn’t have to spread her legs like a dog in heat anytime a guy looks at her.”

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You found a keeper sir.

At my in-laws who are nice sweet people, any potential for real drama is with my family and we made it through unscathed.
I gave my wife’s aunt and uncle some gummies. Uncle got so stoned they just had to leave. My wife is a little pissed, but she’ll get over it after another glass of wine. Pretty tame this year for us

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The main highlight I overheard was “well unlike you, she knows she doesn’t have to spread her legs like a dog in heat anytime a guy looks at her.”

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Pics, if cat fight breaks out.

Well looks like I'll get to be home eating Turkey Gumbo tomorrow after all.

After the tense encounter at lunch, we retreated to the outdoor patio to watch the football game, hoping for a peaceful respite. BTW, Tom Brady the announcer sucks but not as bad as Tom Brady the UM Recruiter. Eff you Brady. The MIL and her third ex-husband eventually joined us, and to our surprise, he offered a half-hearted apology for his earlier behavior. I simply responded with a dismissive "eff you" low enough that the kids didn't hear but firmly enough that he definitely understood. I returned to watching the game.

The awkward silence stretched on as we watched the football game, their presence a constant reminder of the earlier chaos. After a while, they disappeared back inside.

About 45 minutes later, we heard a series of strange, high-pitched yelps coming from the house. It sounded like a red fox caught in a trap. Alarmed, we rushed inside to investigate. The scene that unfolded was beyond belief. The MIL and her third ex-husband, in a drunken stupor, had decided to engage in some late-afternoon intimacy with the door wide open. The yelping noises were, in fact, the MIL's enthusiastic vocalizations.

Before I could react, my wife intervened, shoving them both out the door and slamming it shut. As they stumbled to their car, the MIL yelled, "We're never coming back!" We watched in disbelief as they drove off in their dumpy green F-250, leaving us to clean up the mess and process the bizarre events of the day.

It was shortly after that we realized they left so quickly that they forgot the elderly cat. I don't like cats but the wife has been after me to get a pet. So looks like I lost a MIL but gained an incontinent feline. We've decided to rename it Gemini.