About 5 months in, still unsure about relationship

Before I begin, this is a fricking NOVEL. I realize that. I don't blame anyone for not reading it, clearly. This post likely isn't appropriate for this board, rather than a fricking Ask Delilah column. So, you can bitch about it being so long, but no one is making you read this. Opt out now if it bothers you.


She's VERY sweet, and caring, and does all of the little things that makes a guy happy. She's thoughtful and is truly interested in my happiness. Probably as selfless as a woman can be. Makes me food, packs me food for work, buys me beer that I like. She is trust-worthy, and seems to be loyal. I LOVE her dog. and the dog loves me.

She is a little over-caring at times though, to the point of annoyance, and is more plan-oriented than me. I'm more of a go-with-the flow guy. This causes issues sometimes. Not exactly her fault I suppose. Not THAT big of a deal. Its more of a me being selfish thing, and I know that such compromises must be made in relationships.

She is from the little bubble community in which we both live near. Her parents, who are sweet, live a short car ride away from her. Most of her current close friends are ones that she has grown up with.

This isn't exactly a bad thing, but I am just not all about the suburban, gossipy shite, where everyone is always in everyone else's business, and I feel like this would be an inevitability.

I guess I'll also add that my family LOVES her, and she loves my family.

I also think that she likes me, and is more into the relationship than I am. I have been committed, and reciprocate accordingly, but she says very affectionate things sometimes that I just don't feel like I am on that level with her yet. How big of a problem is this? My last relationship had a good deal of passion. Passion that I'm not feeling in this one. But my last relationship failed, so yeah.

She is a cute, petite redhead. I am not crazy attracted to her physically, but attracted enough. She isn't overweight or anything, nice rack and all, but I wish she would be into going on runs with me, and was more interested in being physically fit, but I realize that that's hard to find sometimes, and if pushed the subject enough, she would probably compromise with me.

And lately I have just have started to miss being single, and flirting, and checking other woman out, and having complete freedom. I was single for a year before I started dating her, and I was kind of digging it.

My best bud just got divorced, and I see him doing whatever the hell he wants, whenever he wants, and I'm afraid that seeing this has influenced me in this direction.

I don't want to frick up a good thing with a good woman, but I also don't want to be in something only for the comfort and security that a good woman gives. This might just boil down to me not knowing what the frick I want right now. That's a common theme for me. I'm 31, she is 27. I am not exactly a spring chicken, but not a geezer either.

I know that every man has that "want" to be a single and frick around, but am I being stupid here? Should I just continue to stick it out with the relationship and stop thinking so much about everything like I always tend to do?

Again, I am so sorry for writing a book. Anyone who read all of that, and has advice to give, I commend and respect you, and I appreciate it.

and sorry guys, pics just aint happening.