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Some really bad rumors about SW Ep. IX

Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:31 am
Posted by tiggerthetooth
Big Momma's House
Member since Oct 2010
64341 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:31 am
LINK


quote:

We're just a few short days out from hopefully seeing the first Star Wars 9footage at Celebration in Chicago, which kicks off this Friday. The big event begins with a panel devoted to this final sequel in the Skywalker saga, and it's expected that we'll finally learn the title along with a few other tantalizing details. But first, we have another story leak that comes from a somewhat trusted source (in that they've been right about a few things in the past). And it deals with romance, the force, and a very scary sounding villain of sorts that may be just a little hard on the eyes.


quote:

We've heard plenty of Star Wars 9 rumors and leaks leading up to this week's Star Wars Celebration, but so far none of them have proven true or false, as Disney and Lucasfilm are keeping a pretty tight lid on any and all information pertaining to the story. This latest tease will come as happy news for all you Reylo shippers out there, as it sounds like J.J. Abrams may have taken the bait, giving back a burgeoning relationship between light side user Rey and dark side abuser Kylo Ren. Mixed into all of this is a very scary sounding new character called The Oracle, who is said to have the power to haunt your nightmares for years to come. What, does he lick butter and eat pies while obsessing over Rose Tico in a basebment? That would certainly give me the shivers.


quote:

There are potential Star Wars 9 spoilers ahead, so tread carefully. This supposed leak comes from Reddit user u/JediPaxis, moderator of the Star Wars Leaks subreddit. This person has come correct with accurate information in the recent past. But still, consider taking this news with a grain of Jakku sand until J.J. Abrams confirms it at Celebration this weekend.


quote:

This latest rumor claims that Star Wars 9kicks off with Kylo Ren still caught in the midst of turmoil, as he struggles to fight between the light and dark side of the force. He can't decide which pull is strongest. Not helping matters is that he's 'in love' with Rey. And this already sounds like bad Star Wars fan fiction. Rey will attempt to mend their broken relationship, but apparently that doesn't go well.


That part of the story sounds a little suspect. Will J.J. Abrams really give us a love affair between Rey and Kylo? What does sound very much in tune with this new Disney era Star Wars is the character called The Oracle, which Kylo comes in contact with. The creature is described as an 'alien parasite'. And it sits on the head of a giant sleeping baby. Perhaps not a human baby. As seen in the movie, this will be created using a puppet or practical effect. There is a 'faithful' recreation of leaked fan art in the Reddit post. And it's something you'd expect to see in a Star Wars movie at this point. Sure, the sleeping baby sounds suspect, but if before seeing The Last Jedi, someone told you Luke Skywalker would be sucking down the deliciously warm green milk of an alien sea cow direct from its udders, would you have believed that rumor?




quote:

It isn't known if Kylo Ren seeks out The Oracle, or if he is 'summoned' to the ungodly creature. It is speculated that The Oracle lives in a new swamp type planet that we haven't seen before. Some are claiming that this could be Star Wars 9's new version of a Yoda like character. But Lovecraftian in nature.

Not much more is said about this Oracle creature. It definitely sounds like it resides on the weirder side of this universe. But as Solo showed us with some of its creations, Disney is all about getting weird with Star Wars. As it stands, there is speculation that The Oracle is just a minor character, which sounds about right. It could possibly lead to two or three important plot threads but probably won't clock much screen time.



quote:

It is stated that Kylo Ren's obsession with Rey will be much more integral to how this particular sequel's story plays out. But will J.J. Abrams really let these two fall in love, since there has already been so much made about Reylo on the Internet to begin with? Just talking about it almost feels like self parody at this point. Is that something Star Wars fans want or need as Lucasfilm wraps up the Skywalker saga forever? This latest news comes from Star Wars Leaks on Reddit. You can see the disturbing recreation of The Oracle at that link. Sorry we can't show you here.
Posted by OMLandshark
Member since Apr 2009
120445 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:35 am to
Posted by The Quiet One
Former United States
Member since Oct 2013
12149 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:41 am to
I doubt this is revelatory, but I so don’t care about any of the characters in this trilogy to really give a shite what happens in episode nine. Short of them having a big orgy and we find out Rey is a Force Squirter, I’m passing on this movie.
Posted by SonicAndBareKnuckles
Member since Jun 2018
1949 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:43 am to
quote:

What, does he lick butter and eat pies while obsessing over Rose Tico in a basebment?


Shoutout to Ethan Van Sciver of ComicArtistPro Secrets, 26 year veteran of the comic book industry, world's most charming, elegant, eloquent, and yet humble man. Great big Star Wars fan and trusted member of the media.
Posted by Centinel
Idaho
Member since Sep 2016
45884 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:44 am to
quote:

and we find out Rey is a Force Squirter


Ya, but the real question is this a Light or Dark Side power?
Posted by Arksulli
Fayetteville
Member since Aug 2014
26930 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 8:57 am to
So the big bad villain will be newly introduced. Yep. That sounds about right for the sequels.

After all, why build up a villain over two movies before the finale of a trilogy when you can introduce them in the last movie and hope they catch on?
Posted by statman34
Member since Feb 2011
3808 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:05 am to
Anything short of revealing Episode 8 did not happen will render Episode 9 irrelevant. Anything else would just be additional salt in the wound.
Posted by boogiewoogie1978
Little Rock
Member since Aug 2012
20052 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:14 am to
This movie is on a one-way collision course with failure.
Posted by HTDawg
Member since Sep 2016
6683 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:20 am to
quote:

very scary sounding villain of sorts that may be just a little hard on the eyes.


Isn't that always the case? It's clear they don't have any new ideas. It's also painfully obvious they didn't plan this trilogy out at all in advance.

It's also obvious Star Wars fans cannot be satisfied no matter what. Nobody hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. Stars Wars fans have gone far past the point of simply being able to enjoy a SW movie.
This post was edited on 4/10/19 at 9:22 am
Posted by St Augustine
The Pauper of the Surf
Member since Mar 2006
72082 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:29 am to
quote:

Ya, but the real question is this a Light or Dark Side power?


Depends on the night
Posted by BulldogXero
Member since Oct 2011
10292 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:33 am to
quote:

It's also obvious Star Wars fans cannot be satisfied no matter what. Nobody hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. Stars Wars fans have gone far past the point of simply being able to enjoy a SW movie.


Where's the evidence for this? I think Star Wars fans just want to see good movies. Star Wars fans don't complain that much about TFA, Rogue One, or even Solo for that matter.
Posted by GeauxLSUGeaux
1 room down from Erin Andrews
Member since May 2004
25669 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:35 am to
quote:

And it deals with romance, the force, and a very scary sounding villain of sorts that may be just a little hard on the eyes.



Posted by Loaner1231
Member since Jan 2016
3903 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:43 am to
Lol this has to be false.
Posted by TeddyPadillac
Member since Dec 2010
30304 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 9:55 am to
quote:

It's also obvious Star Wars fans cannot be satisfied no matter what. Nobody hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. Stars Wars fans have gone far past the point of simply being able to enjoy a SW movie.



What the hell are you talking about?
Most people were satisfied with TFA and looked forward to TLJ. Most people were satisfied with Rogue One. For me, Rogue One is the best Star Wars film after the original trilogy. and for those that watched Solo at home, most likely for free since no one wants to give money to these idiots anymore, most people were mostly satisfied with it.

Star Wars fans are very easily satisfied. It's really not that hard to make a decent Star Wars film. There are very simple expectations to meet, and they have failed miserably at that with TLJ and from the looks of it, with this future shitty movie.
Posted by Roaad
White Privilege Broker
Member since Aug 2006
83821 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:05 am to
This post was edited on 4/10/19 at 2:03 pm
Posted by Roaad
White Privilege Broker
Member since Aug 2006
83821 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:06 am to
(no message)
This post was edited on 4/10/19 at 2:03 pm
Posted by VermilionTiger
Member since Dec 2012
39197 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:26 am to
This is coming from someone who didn't watch Star Wars before The Force Awakens came out:

I watched the first 6 in order of title in the lead up to TFA. The Force Awakens was a pretty damn good movie. It had the villain and the villain had a mystery around him. After Snoke died, what's the point? It's just two teenagers in a lovers quarrel.

The Last Jedi was a complete joke. That's not even me being upset about it because I only invested enough time to watch 7 movies before I saw it. It was an absolute piece of shite, though
Posted by TigerMyth36
River Ridge
Member since Nov 2005
41502 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:36 am to


Some super evolved Midichlorians!
Posted by whatiknowsofar
hm?
Member since Nov 2010
27430 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:36 am to
quote:

It's also obvious Star Wars fans cannot be satisfied no matter what. Nobody hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. Stars Wars fans have gone far past the point of simply being able to enjoy a SW movie.


This is straight fricking bullshite. All we asked for is competent story telling that remained faithful to the overall arc of all the characters we've known for decades.

But hey the guy that played Luke didnt agree with the tone and structure of his character in the Last Jedi and we're the fricking assholes. bullshite.

Maybe next time get a goddamn director that realizes Luke should acknowledge seeing C-3PO after decades apart instead of Mark Hamill having to tell the director. fricking fricks. Disney you can suck my lightsaber.
Posted by Bluefin
The Banana Stand
Member since Apr 2011
13485 posts
Posted on 4/10/19 at 10:41 am to
quote:

The Oracle

Great. I was hoping Kylo would find his true meaning through the advice of an elderly black woman who bakes cookies in the Bronx.
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