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re: Your friend/brother is marrying a complete bitch

Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:23 pm to
Posted by TheWalrus
Member since Dec 2012
40951 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:23 pm to
No it’s his life, even his parents gave him a talk, I tried to be supportive
Posted by shel311
McKinney, Texas
Member since Aug 2004
111291 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:30 pm to
quote:

Just roll with it.

I’m not causing issues with my friend over some stupid woman


Eh. I mean, you're basically stating just being the guy's friend is the ultimate goal and not what may actually be best for the guy.


From the OP, it sounds like it's a group of friends who all agree on this. The best route IMO would be to get the entire group, no not on the bachelor party, to sit down and have a serious conversation and lay out why they feel the way they do, and obvious in a civil manner. If they just come in and say she's a bitch, that's not helping. But lay out all their points and obviously go heavy on how they want what's best for their friend.

But in the end, you do that one time, and one time only. Sure, maybe you lose a friend over it, but I think it's still worth it. And if he hears you out and still wants to marry the girl and also still wants the group as friends, you never bring it up again, and just go back to being bros.
Posted by Hoops
LA
Member since Jan 2013
6605 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:31 pm to
Yeah it’s terrible. Plan on texting and getting responses only when he’s at work or the shitter
Posted by smoked hog
Arkansas
Member since Nov 2006
1819 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:36 pm to
Straight up told my brother what I thought of the girl he was dating. Eventually he listened and moved on. Thanks me now for being blunt.

A former good friend didn't listen as well. I actually backed truck in and left keys in during the wedding. The other 3 groomsmen were also trying to talk him out of it up until 10 minutes before the wedding. Still married but she has pulled him away from all friends and family.
Posted by whoisnickdoobs
Lafayette
Member since Apr 2012
9352 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:36 pm to
Lost a good friend because he married a terrible person. They ended up divorced a few months after being married.

Sucks I lost a good friend, but I'm glad I at least tried to get him to see straight. I feel like it's better to try and help your friend, than to sit there and say nothing, but really for some people there's no helping them. It's pretty much a lose-lose situation most of the time.
Posted by troyt37
Member since Mar 2008
13363 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:39 pm to
quote:

If thus has happened to you, did you let your buddy know what you thought?


Probably the most redneck story of my life. Got in a fistfight with my brother in a hotel in Colorado on Christmas Eve when I found out he was serious about the devil's daughter. We made it through it as brothers, but seldom do I talk to him when he doesn't thank me for trying to fix that mistake before it happened.

Posted by X123F45
Member since Apr 2015
27595 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:39 pm to
The guy I consider my brother is marrying a really good woman... Who is using him for money and a place to stay.

It's messed up, but he seems happy about it.

I got married out of pity, I'm in no place to give anyone advice
Posted by TigerCoon
Member since Nov 2005
18986 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:46 pm to
Stay in your lane, bro.
Posted by DevilDagNS
Member since Dec 2017
2701 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:52 pm to
He knows she is a bitch, so it won't be some big revelation. He just doesn't care for whatever reason. Saying something won't make him dump her, but she may make him dump you. So in other words, there is nothing to gain by saying something unless you are willing to walk away from the friendship.
Posted by NawlinsTiger9
Where the mongooses roam
Member since Jan 2009
35048 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:56 pm to
quote:

It is just tough. Whether it is your brother or a dear friend you just want good things for them.


Damn man, that sounds especially brutal

And the line I quoted hits the nail on the head. It just fricking sucks. Nothing you can do to help while your loved one gets destroyed.
Posted by mailman
Houston
Member since Jul 2009
6143 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 2:58 pm to
quote:

Lose a buddy or have his SO hate you forever... I'd keep my mouth shut and grit my teeth in social situations.


This is true in most situations.
Posted by PiscesTiger
Concrete, WA
Member since Feb 2004
53696 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 3:18 pm to
For the types of us who cannot stand a bitch...and I mean a bi-polar and nasty malignant count, no matter how firehot her tits and arse are, we just do not have the mindset to get it. Certain brothers out there are attracted to bitches and/or whores. It takes all kinds.
This post was edited on 3/4/19 at 3:19 pm
Posted by mmmmmbeeer
ATL
Member since Nov 2014
7474 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 3:19 pm to
Had a USAF buddy who met a Korean chick while stationed over there. He separated from the service, moved in with a couple buddies and I, waiting on her to come over and get married.

Chick could barely speak English. Roommates and I had obviously never met her but knew he was making a very, very poor decision. We all sat him down and broke it down for him why we thought he was making a mistake. We didn't pressure him, just offered up our thoughts.

He wasn't happy with us. That said, a few weeks later he called it all off, thankfully.

A little bit different situation but, regardless, it CAN work to talk to ya boy but you have to do so tactfully and respectfully, as well as preparing yourself for him to completely blow you off and how that will impact your friendship.
Posted by YumYum Sauce
Arkansas
Member since Nov 2010
8341 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:05 pm to
Pussy is not undefeated... but its never had a losing season.
Posted by Rabbs and QStick
Houston
Member since Apr 2012
2858 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:10 pm to
My college roommate married one. I was best man in their wedding and laid out some issues I had with her privately with him prior. It was a good talk, but I came to him not attacking but to really have a back and forth.

After 4 years he seems to be happy and has 1 year old little girl. Not much has changed with our friendship, but that's likely because we both handled the situation how good friends should be.

Just because you know a guy extremely well and are best buddies, doesn't mean you necessarily always understand the perfect woman for him.

Sometimes it's hard to understand what you don't know, maybe she's really a very supportive person in private and just isn't best at fitting in with group around them.I know sounds crazy, but I've seen it before. If he's happy, you should be happy for him. Key is making sure he truly is happy.
Posted by bigwheel
Lake Charles
Member since Feb 2008
6491 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:20 pm to
T & A wins.
Posted by keks tadpole
Yellow Leaf Creek
Member since Feb 2017
7605 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:21 pm to
Odds are that your future wife won't really want to hang-out with of your friend's spouses, or her sisters-in-law, regardless of how sweet and kind all parties involved are. It's the way they are. FWIW, if she was the coolest wife / GF on the planet, she'll will get tired of you coming over the house to BS with her husband, and she will make him choose going to watch their pudgy 8YO daughter cheer-lead at a meaningless 2nd grade CYO football game, vs. to BR, when you have (2) 50 yard-line tickets to LSU A&M, out of spite ( because she wants to go too, since she is cool).

Let it go. Everything works out in the end.
Posted by darnol91
Member since Jun 2015
749 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:36 pm to
quote:

This is happening to my friend right now. He’s completely pussy whipped because he thinks he won’t be able to do better( she does make good money as engineer) but she is so bad for him. All of our friend group agrees.
I’ve gotten drunk and told the girl multiple times I think she’s a bitch and ruining our friend. I’ve told her she’s a manipulative egotistical bitch. And I’ve even started saying it to her face sober.
He’s still up her butt, if he doesn’t care what I have to say and doesn’t talk to me anymore than I don’t want that pussy whipped bitch to be my friend.
Be a man, address the situation and then whatever happens happens. But don’t sit there and not say anything like a bitch


Tell me how you really feel..
Posted by shutterspeed
MS Gulf Coast
Member since May 2007
63883 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:45 pm to
quote:

did you let your buddy know what you thought?


No. People choose mates in part to fulfill deep-seated needs. Just hope the marriage makes him happy or be there when everything falls apart (of course with plenty of shite to give him).
Posted by marcus3000
The nice part of Gardere
Member since Jan 2018
848 posts
Posted on 3/4/19 at 4:53 pm to
I went through this four years ago.

I told my brother this chick was crazy as frick (he knew she was bipolar,) but he "loved" her. Now during her manic episodes she commands the relationship and doesn't understand or respect how my brother stepped up to be a dad (a big deal.)Her moods run that relationship, but my brother spends far more time with my niece so he's got that going for him.
This post was edited on 3/4/19 at 4:54 pm
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