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Started By
Message
Parent Problems looking for advice
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:05 pm
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:05 pm
I am not doing this for no sob poor me stuff I am seriously wanting to know everyones input.
I am a married man in my upper 20's with a 3 year old daughter. I grew up in a very abusive household with a mentally and physically abusive father. My parent divorced when i was 10 however my dad stayed controlling my mom and I and he still does. After the divorce he never moved on which leaves me, my wife, and my kid the only people he has which leads to him bugging us all the time. When my child was first born he would see her once a week however he would still complain that it wasnt enough time. Prior to my child being born he got in a fight with me in front of my mom and Fiance at the time and said he was going to kill me, he has wished me and my wife would get in wreck with our unborn child, the list goes on... Our previous incident caused me and my wife to push him out pretty much and not let him around however he says we are crazy and that it is wrong that he is my daughters grandfather.... In these last few months i have noticed myself in a better mood because he im not letting him stress me out about time with my daughter...With all the things he has done from my childhood till recently he doesnt deserve to see me or my daughter in my eyes but am i wrong for that?
Sorry for the long story but i know somebody on here has to have went through similar problems
I am a married man in my upper 20's with a 3 year old daughter. I grew up in a very abusive household with a mentally and physically abusive father. My parent divorced when i was 10 however my dad stayed controlling my mom and I and he still does. After the divorce he never moved on which leaves me, my wife, and my kid the only people he has which leads to him bugging us all the time. When my child was first born he would see her once a week however he would still complain that it wasnt enough time. Prior to my child being born he got in a fight with me in front of my mom and Fiance at the time and said he was going to kill me, he has wished me and my wife would get in wreck with our unborn child, the list goes on... Our previous incident caused me and my wife to push him out pretty much and not let him around however he says we are crazy and that it is wrong that he is my daughters grandfather.... In these last few months i have noticed myself in a better mood because he im not letting him stress me out about time with my daughter...With all the things he has done from my childhood till recently he doesnt deserve to see me or my daughter in my eyes but am i wrong for that?
Sorry for the long story but i know somebody on here has to have went through similar problems
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:07 pm to SwampBandit
Tell him to hit the bricks.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:08 pm to SwampBandit
quote:
he doesnt deserve to see me or my daughter in my eyes
all that matters.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:09 pm to SwampBandit
Your job as her father is to keep her safe from everyone. If you think he's capable of harming her in any way, keep her away.
This post was edited on 3/8/18 at 3:09 pm
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:09 pm to SwampBandit
You're the parent and you get to decided who interacts with your kid.
Your Dad sounds like a POS sorry to say. Prob best you keep him at an arms length (or more).
Your Dad sounds like a POS sorry to say. Prob best you keep him at an arms length (or more).
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:09 pm to SwampBandit
i wouldn't let him be with her unsupervised. not with that history.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
speaking from experience, he's had his chance, time to cut bait
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
Why would you want that man in your child's life?
Tell him to stay the frick away and if he tries to keep coming around get a fricking restraining order.
Tell him to stay the frick away and if he tries to keep coming around get a fricking restraining order.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
Cut him out if he can't be respectful. Deal with him on your own terms instead of letting him dictate them. He is not entitled to spend any time with his granddaughter, that is your and your wife's choice how much he gets to see her.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
quote:
Prior to my child being born he got in a fight with me in front of my mom and Fiance at the time and said he was going to kill me, he has wished me and my wife would get in wreck with our unborn child, the list goes on and on
quote:
however he says we are crazy
The frick?
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
I think your father proves that parental respect is earned. You’re not wrong.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
If your dad said that shite....you should invite him over for a man to man conversation. Cook some steaks, beat his arse to a pulp and then let him know who runs shite now.
After this happens, he will respect you and you and your family can live in harmony.
After this happens, he will respect you and you and your family can live in harmony.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
It's called a restraining order. You can get one that still allows limited supervised visitation rights.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to MSMHater
quote:
all that matters.
Yea im just tired of the text with the poor me shite and i dont know how much longer i got and so on. I told him i could fricken die this evening that im not living my life assuming he might be about to die to feel sorry for him and give in...
Im literally in the process of selling my house to get away because we cant even sit outside without feeling like he will pass by and he lives fricken 20 minutes away
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:10 pm to SwampBandit
Leave him the frick out. Your kid doesn't need to be around all that shite. Nothing good will come of having him around her.
What exactly is he going to provide?
Tell him to get bent and stay the frick out of your life.
What exactly is he going to provide?
Tell him to get bent and stay the frick out of your life.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:11 pm to SwampBandit
I would tell him the GTFO and file some kind of restraining order. Grandparents aren't owed that time with YOUR child.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:11 pm to SwampBandit
This man’s presence in your life serves absolutely no purpose, and in fact, is completely detrimental.
Cut him loose.
Cut him loose.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:11 pm to SwampBandit
My wife threw her dad out of her life around age 20. Reconnected age 30, forgave. Age 35, had to throw him out again.
He’s never met our kid either and probably never will.
It helps that he moved out of state, but going to family functions on that side of the family has to be coordinated so he won’t be there, which means we hardly ever see them, which is a shame because I like them.
He’s never met our kid either and probably never will.
It helps that he moved out of state, but going to family functions on that side of the family has to be coordinated so he won’t be there, which means we hardly ever see them, which is a shame because I like them.
Posted on 3/8/18 at 3:11 pm to SwampBandit
If your dad is a piece of shite it's ok for you to tell him he's a piece of shite and move on with your life. The fact that he's still your father doesn't change what he is or what he did.
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